“Don’t Tread on Me” somehow became “Carry your papers at all times.” It was never about freedom.

“Don’t Tread on Me” somehow became “Carry your papers at all times.” It was never about freedom.

If ICE agents believe they’ll never be charged this will keep happening. The Hennepin County DA should bring murder charges now. Justice for the family and a message to every federal agent that state laws still apply to them.

ONE DAY HELL WILL BE FULL OF ICE.

I support dry January in theory but unfortunately I’ve already prepaid for multiple cruises and it would be fiscally irresponsible for me not to drink.

The “Las Vegas is struggling because of price gouging” narrative misses the key fact that Canadian travel is way down. Canada is our largest international market and visits are off roughly 30%+ year over year in recent months.

Every time someone good comes into my life, they disappear. No warning. No closure. Just silence. This is about my plumber and electrician not returning my calls.

We should ban gambling on current events. Turning wars, elections and human suffering into betting markets is fucking disgusting. Companies like Polymarket and Kalshi thrive in legal gray zones and we should outlaw them.

I think it’s interesting that far right influencers like Nick Shirley and Fuentes openly describe themselves as virgins. They claim it’s for religious reasons but they don’t exactly spend their time living out those values. It comes across less like faith and more like an inability to get laid.

The biggest problem with SNAP is that healthy food in this country is not affordable.

Policies that restrict SNAP purchases often miss the human impact. When a child’s occasional candy bar becomes unacceptable, something’s gone wrong. At that point, the policy looks less like reform and more like intentional humiliation.

It’s got to be tough being a 13 year old boy these days. You want to date someone your age but you’re competing with presidents, politicians and billionaires.

As we head into the holidays, a season for grace and reflection, how we talk to each other matters. This isn’t about MAGA diehards who won’t question anything. It’s about people who voted for Trump and are now frustrated. It’s possible to acknowledge that without blaming voters themselves. 1/3

Fascism is having to watch a bootleg version of a news program produced in your own country.

The penalties for overselling flights should be so severe that airlines simply stop doing it. If bumping a passenger cost an airline $25,000 in fines (per person) they’d suddenly find a way to manage capacity honestly instead of treating customers like optional inventory.

The DOJ just released what may be the biggest news story of the year. MS NOW, CNN and the BBC are covering it live. Fox News is talking about Ilhan Omar.

It’s telling how the DOJ can find time for repeated grand jury attempts against opponents but not for something as important as redacting the Epstein files If they couldn’t meet the deadline they should have said so weeks ago.

I support naming things after Trump. Ethics laws. Pardon restrictions. Conflict of interest rules. Crypto regulations. When serious people are back in charge, we need a new framework to mandate what used to be obvious until Trump broke it.

My boyfriend does this really cute thing where he asks me for my opinion and then interrupts me mid-sentence to tell me he already decided.

Tonight was my first post in about eight months. I checked out for a while, spending nearly 90 nights this year on cruise ships and making friends from all over the world. I’ve never felt less proud to be an American. Some will tell me to leave. I might someday. But I’m not the problem. They are.

Still waiting for Trump to explain how Biden caused the tariffs.

“I’VE NOT LOST CONTROL” is what I tell my boyfriend when he asks if we should call a plumber because there’s water everywhere and I’ve been trying to fix it all day.

Turning on Fox for a few minutes to see the spin. Lindsey Graham is on with Sean Hannity. I clearly have a pain kink.

You can’t gaslight people about affordability, brag your way through a speech, declare inflation “solved,” take credit twice for the same war, close borders and damage alliances, promise tax cuts that explode debt, and still pretend voters aren’t feeling it. People live in reality.

I thought he’d go longer. I guess he doesn’t have the stamina.

“Inflation is stopped, prices are down, and America is back.” No one agrees with that.

I’m not sure where gas is $1.99, but I’m pretty sure it’s nowhere I’d ever want to go.

Six. 👋 Seven. 👋 The Republican healthcare plan

Next year we’ll start seeing the results of the tax cuts and they’ll show up as even more crippling debt.

You can’t gaslight people about affordability. If their groceries, rent and insurance are hurting them, telling voters it’s “down” won’t change that but it will change their opinion of you.

I’ll try to watch the speech...we’ll see how long I last. I don’t expect a war announcement. I expect an hour of self congratulation.

ONE DAY HELL WILL BE FULL OF ICE.

My front yard cactus is leveling up—last year it had just one flower, and this year it’s pushing out five.

The man who ran a fraudulent university and defrauded countless students should be the last person talking about punishing real academic institutions. But here we are.

People say “He’s playing chess while you’re playing checkers.” No—actually he’s at a tiny table shoving crayons up his nose.

My dentist asked if I floss twice a day. I said yes but forgot to mention it’s only on the days I have a dentist appointment.

Just spent two hours replacing all the handles on my kitchen cabinets. I can confidently say—American factories screwing in tiny screws to make iPhones sounds miserable.

The price hikes and market losses don’t come close to the grief and rage I feel for the innocent men rotting in a hellhole in El Salvador. Let the tariffs stay. Let the people who voted to treat humans like trash finally feel something—anything.

Trump didn’t win because of culture war nonsense—he won because people felt the pinch of inflation. Now that he’s driving the economy off a cliff, I’m weirdly okay with it. Just keep those tariffs up. Let his voters taste what they voted for.

"Sixteen Nobel laureates have described his (Trump's) economic plan as something that would increase inflation and by the middle of next year would invite a recession." Kamala Harris 9/10/24

The operation was a success! The patient woke up, saw the bill, checked his 401(k) and promptly asked to be put back under.

My boyfriend told me he hates me today. Well, his exact words were: “I don’t want you starting another home improvement project until you finish the seven that are still pending.” Same thing, really.

I know it’s petty, but if I get a Tesla for my Uber, I’m canceling the ride instantly. Done it a few times now. The shitty part? A lot of Teslas in Uber’s fleet are leased to drivers at subprime rates.

Elon Musk asked what kind of jerk enjoys watching Tesla’s stock crash. Me, I do. 😈

Stocked up on Crown Royal today. My Canadian friends might be boycotting our liquor (rightfully so) but I’m still happy to support yours.

Back from a month-long social media detox. Feeling refreshed and ready to dive back in!

Tesla stock is 30% cheaper since Trump took office. I guess he is lowering prices.

Hey Elon, here’s what I accomplished last week: 1. Went on a cruise and drank like a pirate. 2. Made work pay for Wi-Fi, then ignored all emails. 3. Ordered two entrées every night. 4. Told everyone I heard calling the Gulf of Mexico the Gulf of America to go fuck themselves.

I ate an entire pint of Talenti in the bathtub today. 10/10 would recommend.

We should rename the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans to “The American Ocean.” That way, when a pilot announces, “We’re now flying over the American Ocean,” everyone will be confused because there are two of them.