I was also born in the time of John Paul II & now will be on my 4th Pope in my lifetime & old enough to state that they don't make Popes like the used too.

Yesterday I got sunburnt quite badly. Today I will get very wet when I head outside. This seems not normal.

While I know the now ex Pope renounced his salary ($32k PER WEEK) I think we can all relate to the faint possibility of a future that involves dying while still working 🫠✌️

It's only day 7 but I can confirm this is an absolute first pancake of a month. For sure.

I feel like 5am me is the most determined & sure me that exists. I absolutely know that me at any other time of the day cannot cope with her legacy most of the time.

When are we banning fireworks?

The people who aren't coming with you into next year do we bin them tonight or is this a tomorrow job? Asking for myself.

2024 was a bit (lot) of a shitter. Just going to keep working on it in 2025.

I really wish HMRCs hold wasnt just silence, I'm scared. I already know they are mad at me, this is not helping.

When we invariably have to build society again from ground up what are we doing about slow walkers?

Wanted to enter today very much with the confidence of the low loader that over took the Tesla in front like it was the reason we were all doing 30 in a 60 & definitely not the Yaris 4 cars ahead. Turns out I did. What a knobber.

Going for a run at lunchtime in the hopes it changes my entire personality.

Bottle holder pockets on bags are weird. Just put it in your bag like a normal person.

When I'm in charge we're having 28 days in a month. They will all start on a Monday. There will be 13 months. I'm not a fan of adding in another month end but sweet mother of God it'd be offset by the lack of mental gymnastics around planning flucating dates.

Today I'm being incredibly unproductive on cock lane. Which might be a contender for title of my memoir.

A Brief History of Women Are Too Emotional 🧵

Well, we have a update. Add a tiny bit of dark muscovado sugar & make it a flat marmite white instead. Chefs kiss. No notes.

Just living for the #WomenInMaleFields hashtag on socials right now.

I'd like the record to show that I ran 8 miles yesterday without stopping for coffee & a read. I stop because coffee is life & reading is fun.

Once more of the people in the back. (and most men)

Late to the party but a marmite latte is a solid 11/10.

Yoga, coffee & deep chats. Perfect Saturday morning before 10am.

I know why going away me decided to air my bed & bedding. Coming back me is as furious as expected.

How's work? Oh I hate it here. Can you add a bit more positivity to that statement? Oh I'm positive I hate it here

Honestly, my rewatch of Brothers & Sisters is just everything. I just love Calista Flockhart & Rob Lowe 😭

Interested to know if Space is as mad at billionaires as the Ocean is.

There is a fly buzzing around my bedroom, there are other rooms why are you here my guy? And I might be being dramatic but I just want to move house at this point because he will not be quiet.

It's been a day . I absolutely know the people who picked up my car would have declined the house key & headphones attached to my car key, but at the same time does anyone know where they are? And really I should have spotted this before 10pm.

When it's bin night & the neighbour wants to chat till they realise you're just in your knickers & a big cardigan. I'm not stupid, I knew exactly what I was doing.

I had my hair & nails done yesterday & my neighbour kindly commented I should take myself out & I joked that it would need to be quick & painless & laughed. He asked if I was okay. So that was nice 🫠✌️

I really need those 'dissappear for a month' advertising things to stop because I'm sorely tempted but have too many responsibilities.

Do I... 1. Yoga at home for 45 minutes of an hours class so I've got 15 minutes to get somewhere for 7pm. 2. Yoga in the carpark at the place I need at at 7pm at 6pm & do the whole hour? Either way I'll shove a hoodie on.

Swimming on a broken toe is not the one, 400m continuous drills in fins on a broken toe is not the one either 🤢

The mole hill I'm prepared to die on is that people who think Milton Keynes is a weird place to drive around just aren't that well travelled in the UK.

Me, 18 years ago, watching Brothers & Sisters: I love Justin. *me thinking I've changed & evolved* Me, today, rewatching Brothers & Sisters: I still love Justin.

I have consumed no news or content for the last 48 hours, just blue sky, the gold thing in the sky, real people & cricket. It's been marvellous. & I can confirm I will learn absolutely nothing from this.