i'm a "pick me girl" specifically to aliens 👽🖖

i am going to a dinner in a private home tonight with boomers, can i wear my comfy pants and sports bra? can my dog come? can i skip?

i agreed to be mt man's partner in a pickleball league and if it breaks us up, that is on him; he knows i'm not competitive (or sporty, or coordinated)

i'm getting very excited about the 👰 though, trying to put my thoughts down for making a speech then is also what's stirring all the old shit up. where have i been, what did i learn, how have i grown to get to this moment, and feel like i have a partner who's building something with me?

semi secret micro-blog thoughts on closure, healing, gratitude... I'm feeling compelled to write my ex mil a letter to make amends? for not having the confidence to build a relationship with her? but thank her for welcoming me in to her family at the time how she did?

I think I should be more open about my opinions. Like the new ugly signs all over mt man's shop about how the discount program is changing - I want to take a photo and tag the asshat accountings with "imagine hating your customers this much"

This bitch (Beavis) got me up and out of bed only so he could sleep in it alone. 🗡️

very little, as it turns out, is about me.

dogs having zoomies (or as we call it with Beavis, cornholio mode) is so cute and uplifting

new thought/mission: should i make an ig where i post all the litter around my town to attempt to shame people into action? "TownnameTrash" bio: it's embarrassing to be your neighbor i bought a litter picker last summer and could just spend the summer cleaning up my neighborhood

sent a polite email requesting a fee be waived/discounted...fingers crossed.

confession: i don't actually like the guy who's catering our 👰's food, but other people do so i'm doing it for the people!!

you know how health insurance gives you discounts on stuff? i went poking around to see what i could get and it's all data privacy nightmare shit to get you (me) to stop taking meds and just vibe. l o l no thx bcbs

do most narcissists accuse those around them of being a narcissist? also, if i'm contemplating this, it pretty much means i'm not, right?

seeing a pic with my cystic acne patch from 3 years back makes me happy how much my skin improved. thanks spironolactone!

all i want to know is what this will mean for the flying d ranch and his conservation efforts near me.

most insane coworker: extra special insane

YouTube has removed one of my videos because I reported that women can still access abortion pills. I shared *factual & medically accurate* information about women's health—yet the platform says I'm "facilitating the sale of illegal drugs"

boss is testing the new hire by asking if she would like her email account turned on in advance of her start date. fuck offffffffff

my local market is using AI to generate social media posts and while at least they are proofreading so it's not total slop, i still just don't want a daily post from the market on why i should shop local. also i only shop there because of convenience, their prices are still nuts w/ minimal selection

beavis is great and adorable, but he is still a needy, energetic, puppy, so of course i encourage mt man to take him to work and give me a break

should we get our 80-something 12-step friends who will be officiating our 👰 some small token, if so, what? maybe just some flowers to wear? what about my bestie that has been helping me plan by making calls and coordinating stuff? flowers for parents? i haven't decide if/who will walk me?

thoughts and feelings are the worst. why haven't we created an on off switch for this yet? or is it weed?

(never used*) bidet available on facebook marketplace *so says the post

popping joint + muscle relaxer + thc/cbd balm + heating pad + nap. I expect to live! 🙏

Pain-somnia from my hip/si joint/low back. I don't feel or hear it pop back into place but I tried when I finally got up and am now heating padding+muscle relaxering

New honeymoon idea, go to canada and stay there

meanwhile liz phair is touring with sleater kinney and will be in MT on my wedding night? angsty teen angry feminist meatsr is reconsidering her plans for the evening. "hey friends and fam, great to see you h8 2 fuck n run but....."

do you guys want to see my beard and mustache growth so far? (it's just 2 dark hairs) ((I think i'm going to let them linger until mt man says anything)) (((i bet he will tell me there's an eyelash on my face before anything)))

they are dicking mt man over, again, now with a contract that puts him (after 3 years) into a probationary period, cuts his vacay time, and changes him to at-will when MT is a with cause state. what a bunch of assholes.

i had an idea of what if mt man and i honeymoon BEFORE the wedding? leave labor day weekend for a week, come back to all our friends and family in town, celebrate for a few days, then go back to real life?

speaking of narcissists the reason my sister won't be coming to my wedding is because she doesn't want to sit with my parents. she did not ask if there would be assigned seating.

beavis is being nuts this afternoon and i feel bad that i'm really really trying to finish a project. i wish i could just send him outside to ride his bike (but he's a tiny dog)

why has this week been 8 years long? how is it only wednesday?

how tf did my ancestors raw dog life w/o pharmaceuticals? oh yeah alcohol. maybe i should start drinking more/again.

doh! left the garage door wide open over night 🤦

i can like taste a cigarette in my mouth right now and have never smoked. probably a migraine warning sign.

i have too many feelings this afternoon but primarily it's "i don't wanna"

my lovesac supersac is so big and beavis is so small

i'm struggling to focus today, just give up?

fyi i pivoted and made tacos last night.

i really need fire place guy to go so i can grab: an onion maybe mashed potatoes something sweet for my sweety

my boss: here's what my ai thinks about our messaging. meastr, after reviewing the output and seeing that none of the messaging he's fed it is anything i've written or published: i agree with ai, you are not using the approved messaging

my tinnitus is so loud right now

i have started let most annoying run our check-in calls instead of trying to control everything and now we just spend 90 minutes with her screensharing with me on how bad our data is and me saying "yep" it's been great for my mental health

never understood rural america problems til i moved there

it's nice that the rest of yall can get boosters but that shit is not at all available within driving distance of me

dark thought of the day: was their less su*cide in olden times because it was easier to 💀 generally? like... don't like your parents? get lost during your rite of passage retreat.

"demonization of the pr*sident" no hun, he's a ghoul!