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There's a wet diaper on my bedroom floor I absolutely know nothing about. (That's a lie.)

you want to be daddy’s [adjective noun], don’t you, [pet name]? you want to [verb] and [verb] for daddy like a good [gender]

Easter Boi 🐰

More like thickness prince...

Happy Pink Moon. 🌸

🦕🦖🧁🎉 with @lukeadventures.bsky.social

Played kissies with my 🧸

Happy Spring Equinox. 🌱

Wet night 💦

Happy Sap Moon. 🍁

Can I come over and we play "let’s make it fit"? 👉🏻👈🏻

Plugged & padded 🐸

I am NOT trying to trick you into putting a leash on. And if you would just come here, within leashing-range, you'd be able to see that.

Let's get this butt padded! 🦄

www.buildyourdynamic.com 🫠

Happy Horny Werewolf Day

Are you actually "low maintenance" or did you just internalize at a young age that the less resources, attention and energy you require, the more lovable you are? So you take the least amount space possible because you think you're unlovable if you express desires or needs.

Happy Storm Moon. 🌩

I'm smooth like a 🧜🏾‍♂️ again.

Happy Wolf Moon. 🐺

Happy New Year! 🦄

It's the first New Year's Eve I won't be padded at midnight in quite a few years. 😬

Happy winter solstice! Today the Oak King is reborn.💙💚

Watch me pretending to be big! 💪🏻

Happy Oak Moon. 🌳

I'm smooth like a 🧜🏾‍♂️ again.

Four cocktails later... 🧽

I'm not handsome, I'm pretty!

Happy Frost Moon. ❄️

Happy Samhain! 💜💙

Happy Harvest Moon. 🌾

It's gonna be a rainy day. Wet. Leaky even. 💦

😮‍💨

I don't know what grey is. I never did. 😟

Beware!

Nightstand Romance 🧸

Locked, not padded. Soon to be wet.

Happy Wine Moon. 🍇

Needy boi... 😫

Tummy Saturday or whatever. I'm way too young for anankastic alliterations. 🤷🏻

It's been a while 🧁

When not observed a little is both "me baby!🥺" and "i'm big!💪🏼" at the same time. Only when the glass flask is broken and the hydrogen cyanide is released they become either manic or depressed.

I think I’m kinda soggy after the 5,5h car ride 😇🙈

Happy Sturgeon Moon. 🐟

Fun fair! 🎠

Big boi. In one way or the other. Mostly the other. 😵‍💫

"Pull the lever, Kronk!" is the funniest joke in cinematic history and will never be topped.

Happy Buck Moon. 🦌

Let's play splashies! 💦