happy new

me at 4 am

kill suffering

i really genuinely hope that all the horror i have is only mental and made up and not actually external and thus uncontrollable or real

i didn't know i could fully experience severe parasympathetic acute stress reaction while sleeping and seeing awful things in dreams and still have it after waking up but i guess i have to live with that now

reality is so difficult

i hate bureaucracies they are so obfuscated and exhausting

i'm the best musician ever

i'm tired

to live happily in this universe is to be a supergenius i suppose

imagine if there was no horror and dread in life

this is awful and depressing and i am nowhere near ready to ever do that

ethereal with some of its definitions is such a good word that describes most things i enjoy

if you have (actual) ocd do everything you possibly can to fully treat it before it irrecoverably and painfully ruins your life

i need to learn a way to stop clinging to views and opinions it brings me so much suffering and internal conflict and anxiety when i see someone or manyones say something that goes against what i think

i have a strong craving to leave this universe somehow

i released a thinger you can listen to.................................................. soundcloud.com/uefiser/feat...

most sane automation

sometimes i make an insanely cool sounding track and get surprised by how cool it sounds and then i wake up

funny fpc trick i randomly discovered

waters #deltarunespoilers

reality is probably the most evil phenomenon that can exist

i need a visual style that is closer to the game i don't like the current one

ore

music is so difficult i can't

apparently i reached the point where i can't even feel comfortable eating anymore

what do i do if i can neither exist as a lay person due to inability to do anything nor as a monk due to inability to both do anything and to bear absence of pleasure until my death

i've been learning buddhist cosmology and so far it makes actually somehow so much sense and even though i don't really accept any religious ideas the ones in buddhism would probably be the closest to me out of all

my skills and feelings depend so much on ocd i can barely do anything i hate mental illnesses

physical existence is disgusting

Old Rain world arts^`^ #RainWorld

i wish either my mind was immune to external conditions or i wasn't surrounded by external conditions horrible enough to cause such profound unbearable damage to it

Echoes of sand and rain ... Thanks for waiting! Had much fun with this one! Posted in full resolution, thanks for the love! #Rainworld #rainworldfanart

funy wave

^w^

wow state censorship is another step closer i wish humans didn't fall for the belief of politics