Matt
@thotwheelsracer.bsky.social
š¤ 614
š„ 300
š 1372
Just a lil guy // a staunch character
Marina Diamandis you have 5 hours and 20 minutes to reconsider and put How to Be a Heartbreaker back on the setlist
29 minutes ago
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You just know an interactive seat map hates to see me coming
about 14 hours ago
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On reflection, cooking a batch of soup shirtless was probably a choiceā¦
about 22 hours ago
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COLE ESCOLA OH MARY! LONDON ALERT šØ
2 days ago
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We now go live to me, this Bank Holiday Monday
loading . . .
3 days ago
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āAnd how do you feel about having to wear a uniform?ā āI think we can all see the sense of it, for hygiene. And it protects your nipples.ā
5 days ago
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I fear SeƱorita Cactus is about to become my own personal Evelyn Tucci
5 days ago
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Costume parties are great, what do you MEAN youāve come dressed as SeƱorita Cactus, the deleted character from Pixarās Toy Story 2 that was eventually replaced with Jessie the Yodelling Cowgirl??
5 days ago
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Iām that friend you only keep around because they have a car, they call me the driversity hire
6 days ago
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Please donāt make me narrow it down to just 10
add a skeleton here at some point
7 days ago
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Havenāt really been looking after myself properly these past few months, but fear not, your boy is making soup again and Iām taking that as a sign Iāve turned a corner and good things are coming
7 days ago
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I have been ASSASSINATED
add a skeleton here at some point
8 days ago
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I really need to stop having traumatic experiences with evil evil men in venues called Village
8 days ago
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Is the Kia Oval like the Khia Asylum?
8 days ago
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Just woke up from a nap where I dreamed it was my wedding day, and just as we were about to be declared married a curtain fell to reveal we were on the set of Game Changer and the marriage didnāt count because he didnāt say Sam Says
9 days ago
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Posting this in hushed tones because itās a bit cringe to admit things, but friends fear he is itching to try writing comedy againā¦
10 days ago
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This and other insights š
10 days ago
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I am a delicate Spring flower please nobody talk to me for the next 2-4 business days
11 days ago
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Happy Oh Mary! new casting announcement day to all who celebrate (Broadway edition)
add a skeleton here at some point
15 days ago
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Everybody say happy birthday Max
20 days ago
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Me: I only know that song from a Simpson's parody? Them: That's how I discovered Spider-Man. From the pig
22 days ago
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In no particular order:
add a skeleton here at some point
23 days ago
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Might fuck around and start a thread of all the times I felt pure, unadulterated joy tbh
23 days ago
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Delightfully vague
23 days ago
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Gleefully collecting images of the Met Gala looks I particularly like for discussion with fashion friends tomorrow ššš
24 days ago
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Setting up jokes for your friends is one of lifeās greatest pleasures
about 1 month ago
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Sometimes when people greet you with a āhello gorgeousā, itās not because they fancy you, itās because theyāre doing an impression of Barbra Streisand. I learned that the hard way
about 1 month ago
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We call my birthday party āThe Mat(t) Galaā and just to warn you all now Iāve decided that a future theme will be āAnyone Fancy a Curry?ā and all guests will have to dress up as their favourite Tim Curry character
about 1 month ago
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I regret to inform you all that dadhood has finally come for me (I now spend half my day making gross throat clearing noises)
about 1 month ago
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Idk I just really think Iād slay a hotdog eating competition (not a euphemism)
about 2 months ago
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I never want to see a captcha ever again
about 2 months ago
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Went for Korean BBQ with a friend and accidentally drank a large bottle of soju by myself so ask me anything I guess
about 2 months ago
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Screw star signs, I want to know which of the Bennett sisters you most closely identify with
about 2 months ago
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HBOās The Pitt
about 2 months ago
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What a deeply cursƩd day today has turned out to be
about 2 months ago
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Tickled to discover that the entrance Sweatbox is the fire assembly point for a nearby office
about 2 months ago
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Itās all fun and games rehearsing the emotional crescendo of Memory from CATS until you realise neighbours have heard you belting the phrase ātouch meā over and over and itās still well beyond your vocal range
about 2 months ago
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Got any games on ur phone?
about 2 months ago
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Rebecca Black on Jeopardy! son or PinkPantheress on The Weakest Link daughter
about 2 months ago
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Fashionably late to the Haute and Freddy party
about 2 months ago
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I am about to become insufferableā¢ļø
about 2 months ago
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I thought I looked nice today (full outfit that got two (2) compliments not pictured)
2 months ago
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Lousy Smarch weather
2 months ago
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Now you all know me, Iām not one to cry at a musical, but I cannot even begin to describe my emotional response when they revealed the set at Into The Woods tonight
2 months ago
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And todayās performative man of the dayā¢ļø is the guy with a top knot sat at the table next to me in an art gallery cafe pretending to read Dostoyevsky
2 months ago
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Excuse me, is anybody feeding the birds? Because I donāt think that anybodyās feeding the birds
2 months ago
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Did I ever tell you about the time I got ghosted by a magician? Best disappearing act heās ever done tbh šŖ
2 months ago
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Am going to a formal dinner tonight so have had to pull some suits out of the wardrobe and the variations in size are WILD because some are from pre-covid when I was a good 20kg heavier
2 months ago
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MAYA RUDOLPH OH MARY
3 months ago
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Letās get this place HUMID
3 months ago
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