I do wonder sometimes if id be happy in a relationship because I pretty much only really tried to be in one once but it went pretty badly. I feel like there were two other times in my life I kinda wanted to but nothing ever happened with those people in the end

I've been playing this game a bit lately and I really like it I recommend it! store.steampowered.com/app/2436940/...

sometimes I feel sad not being able to share certain games or things with friends because it's only available in english

My anxiety has been really hard to deal with lately for me but as much as I try to ignore it, it's still making me freeze up and have difficulty even speaking with friends at times

I used to be like, shamelessly myself but then people would kinda copy me on social media and I didn't like that but sometimes I wanna express more of the abstract side of myself more again cuz it's been so many years

There are so many things I'm grateful for... things really can always get worse, be grateful while you can

Sometimes I get phantom smells because my sense of smell is so bad, It's usually not what you'd expect though they are like smell hallucinations and it'll be things like; Rubber Alcohol Latex Gasoline Mint Pickle Brine Banana Peel Leather Chlorine Pool Smell random stuff like this

some doodles I did for a friend a while back

I had a ton of scares with my laptop today and my cortisol was through the roof but i'm sitting here now and it works and I can only hope it'll work tomorrow in the morning

I started to do one of these too muahaha

I did the completion, I am excited for the full game

there's a level of guilt I feel trying to use my Japanese in non-learning spaces, like I'm just a hinderance or awkward to interact with because I don't speak well. I think at this point the anxiety of that feeling is stronger than any anxiety I have for speaking in the first place.

This whole thread I forgot to mention immature people suddenly change personalities for the worse when around certain people or kinds of people. Those people still have some growing to do so I think I'm comfortable not getting too close

Bravely Default HD just shadowdropped on steam so I will be playing that

Okay after playing more deadlock I finally got put into a rank I think fits me better ( I was ranked WAY too highly before ) and also I really like playing Victor a lot

I want to work on not feeling so frustrated at myself for feeling so stupid

this OS is so bad dude

Also.. ive been doing some tabletop rpg stuff lately and I actually quite enjoy it but wow im so bad at the roleplaying part, its kinda embarrassing just playing a character in that way.

Those last drawings I did made me think it is really fun making quick little doodles of some cute guys for concepts, game characters really can just be cute little guys...

If I have too much joy sometimes I get a headache, too much smiling, laughing, or I guess happy chemicals. Headache.

doodled this guy in a drawpile

Lately I've been really nostalgic with Kid Icarus Uprising it was I think my favorite 3DS game

I have compassion for people who hate me for some reason, like wanting to help someone who hates me is impossible but y'know I guess I can't really stop that feeling from welling up in me it might be a personality trait

I drew moth again for some reason

I feel like I have no desire to do anything lately, like I'm forcing myself to play video games, Forcing myself to study, Forcing myself to draw, Forcing myself to talk to people

I'm always sooo bad about feeling like all of my efforts are for nothing, I just want to skip to the end...

just stubbed my toe so hard half the nail got stuck at a 90 degree angle it's like an "L" shape. Horrible.

A lot of suicidal thoughts lately again

ooogh I am so bad at dealing with embarrassment

I get incredibly anxious when I am having a good time with something and nothing horrible seems to be going on for too long

I think part of why I wish I could be a part of something bigger is because I don't feel capable of making something big myself. I'd love if I could but I've lived my whole life feeling like i'm eternally 2nd rate

Not gonna keep talking about this but, If America is such a country of freedom there sure is a lot of laws and bills being presented/passed that take AWAY freedom lately.

Is there no cure for the feeling of feeling alone yet you are surrounded by people. This and lonely yet socially overwhelmed, I feel like I spent hours muted in a call with friends today cuz it kept happening where I was overwhelmed over and over

i'm confused by this and what exactly main volume even is and why are they different but control eachother

Does anyone else avoid being nice ALL the time so people don't get a crush on you or something

I don't know why but I've been incredibly tired and sickly feeling lately, lots of headaches, lots of random pains, only awake for maybe 9 or so hours before I want to sleep for 10 hours and having this sort of wake-sleep cycle does not feel good

I feel like talking about it a bit, But Fritz in this image (The mad scientist fox) I had as a character who achieved immortality through alchemic processes or creating a potion, something like biological engineering in a fictional sense --

I wish I got more art criticisms honestly, Constructive ones at least. I know it's easy to say "you should color more/add backgrounds more" but I would love "you should try this or incorporate this" as a way to help my style look better/more appealing

I am instantly turned off and away from people who just say 'female' instead of girl or woman etc.

最近、レイトン教授と不思議な町のフレンドリー版をやってた。何年か前に英語でやったけど、日本語版には違うパズルもあるらしい。そして、前に解いたパズルはほぼ全部忘れちゃった 日本語の初心者としてはこういうゲームがつらい あああ

I'm gonna make a point to never respond to anyone who opens with 'hey can I tell you something' or 'I got some news' etc. like, I just won't respond. If you want to tell me something just say it, It's needlessly adding tension for no reason

I wish the kind of education I want didn't cost so much money, I really don't trust myself to teach myself something so difficult like a language, but I just... I just wish I had some results to show for it. Even after all of this time every day... There's still so much I don't understand

It's hard to say or do anything when I constantly am telling myself no one cares. And often it's true, especially if it's just me enjoying the things I enjoy or just wanting to talk. It's always easier to conform to what the others are doing but it'll always make me feel hollow for it

I really do love the amount of customizability these games have and having a whole squad of interchangeable demons fitted to your playstyle feels so cool to me