Have you ever just decided to act despite feeling you haven’t prepared enough? And do you chronically disqualify praise in one area, when you’re scared, while easily accepting it in another, when you’re feeling confident? www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

While it’s true that difficulty with beginning tasks is associated with ADHD and Major Depression, being symptoms of both, and OCD, which entails analysis paralysis, it’s also associated with the way we perceive the world and how we tend to learn about it. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Some struggle with conceptual overlap. This means that fuzzy categories scare them. To them, a thing is either a thing or it isn’t. Very binary; very black-and-white. The world only makes sense when everything in it is neatly organized and categorized. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

It’s easy to be critical and negative, pointing out differences; it’s much harder to discover what makes things similar. While negativity makes us feel safer, giving us excuses to avoid pursuits and people, it doesn’t mean that we are, or not meaningfully. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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OCD brings potential suffering into the present; it breathes life into it in the way people believe God breathes life into each soul. And it makes something out of nothing, at least nothing so meaningful. The Drama shows OCD in a way seldom seen in film. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Certainty eliminates the possibility of experimentation and, as importantly, the possibility of being wrong. While the individual believes that their parents were clear but wrong, they might instead prefer parents who are better able to tolerate ambiguity. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

His decision to self-sabotage isn’t just an attempt to escape a possible marriage; it’s also pushing back against the universe and even her. How dare Emma be someone other than whom he envisioned? Charlie is the epitome of those of us who struggle with OCD. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Charlie failed to grasp, which is common with OCD, that even if you had a simple understanding of someone’s decisions, for example regarding trauma, that doesn’t automatically mean you’d know how to help them. Arguably, Emma was fine. #thedrama www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

They wanted their parents to say, “This is so clearly the right choice for you, and since you’re too scared to make it, we’ll do it for you.” Thus, the universe makes sense. It feels as though some force is working to make their life better. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

#TheDrama showcases OCD in a way seldom seen on screen; we usually get depictions of people who can’t stop cleaning. The film asks: How well do we know anyone? And: Can we live with epistemological gaps in our relationships? www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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OCD latches onto facts and extends them, logically stretching them to the farthest end of human suffering. In a nutshell, OCD brings potential suffering into the present; it breathes life into it in the way people believe God breathes life into each soul. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Faith is a significant part of treatment for OCD, as well as humility. When we think of faith, we often think of religion, superstition, or even blind faith. We think of faith as a means of survival, a practical way to motivate ourselves to engage in life. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Emma didn’t need help. And while she didn’t understand how, she seemed to somehow move on while Charlie couldn’t. Emma symbolized the chaos underlying his well-organized life. And this left us with the question: Has love eluded Charlie or has he eluded it? www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

#TheDrama showcases obsessive tendencies in a way seldom seen on screen; we usually get depictions of people who can’t stop cleaning. The film asks: How well do we know anyone? And, more importantly: How well should we expect to know them? www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

His decision to self-sabotage isn’t just an attempt to escape a possible marriage; it’s also pushing back against the universe and even her. How dare Emma be someone other than whom he envisioned? And how dare life do this to him? Charlie epitomizes OCD. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

From the obsessive-compulsive perspective, where coherence is a necessity, its lack can and likely will be destabilizing. In treatment, a patient may tell us they wish someone else could make a meaningful life choice for them. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

While again beneficial, coherence precludes discovery. We can instead choose to value the truth and our ability to hold it, at least more so than coherence. This means allowing our lives to unfold, and it means having the courage to no longer be heroes. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

We chalk up idealism to youth, but it’s fair to say that most of us, even if we consider ourselves to be adults, struggle with tolerating uncertainty. Personally, my obsessive-compulsive mind detests it. I want my life to appear as a clear narrative. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

On ep 255, we welcome Jonathan Vigliotti to discuss the Palisades Fire, the systemic failures that caused it, the ethics of private fire brigades, how climate change influenced the fire, and the political neglect and flawed reasoning around it. Full ep: youtu.be/uplBbYqzRug

Rather than freedom, individuals with OCD, for example, may wish their parents did what was best for them—to take this choice of whether to embrace what they really wanted to love and make it for them. Here, the universe feels sensical. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

My obsessive-compulsive mind detests it. I want my life to appear as a clear narrative, where everything I do and everything that happens to me is part of some grander play, with me at its center, of course. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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Can we decide to just love to learn, for its own sake? And can we continue to hold onto hope, knowing that we’re equipped to handle whatever will come, even if, ultimately, we can’t make sense of it? Can that be meaningful, without any obvious meaning? www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Coherence precludes discovery. We can instead choose to value the truth and our ability to hold it, at least more so than coherence. This means allowing our lives to unfold, and it means having the courage to no longer be heroes. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

The Drama is one of the best films I’ve seen, and definitely the best depiction of OCD, outside of The Aviator. I’ll write about it at some point. Truly blown away.

Rigidity—black-and-white thinking—may inform the belief that parents have to always be supportive, even forceful in their support, to show they care. This is accompanied by the belief that they have to possess moral clarity, especially when the child can’t. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

The thought may be: “My anger clearly didn’t come from nowhere, and you’re the only one here.” We may attribute the source of our anger to another, deflecting responsibility for our feelings onto them, while again justifying it by its existence. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

In perfectionism, anger is associated with cynicism and pessimism, and with the belief one has to be on guard. Anger is also associated with anxiety, which, by its existence, allows one to believe they need to protect themselves from some evident danger. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Anger protects the perfectionist from themself, from the self-censure and rage felt about being wrong or overreacting. Anger, also, provides a continued sense of purpose and distraction from one’s inability to like anything about themself. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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We may attribute the source of our anger to another, deflecting responsibility for our feelings onto them, while again justifying it by its existence. “You made me angry” is a refrain in couples therapy. Thus, the perfectionist remains stuck in an enclave. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

It’s become popular to think of anger, and rage more specifically, as symbolic of chronic mistreatment. This is especially true in philosophy circles. Rage is conceived of as a natural response to injustice. So, it’s justified merely by its existence. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Perfectionists, especially the more demanding ones, hardly ever question their ideals. While this is extremely beneficial, or at least can be, in the fight for a more equitable world, personally, stubbornness can imply a deep lack of empathy. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Anger isn’t by itself an indicator of reality. The cognitive distortion, which in general is a pattern of flawed reasoning, of emotional reasoning implies that we’re using a feeling to form a conclusion about the world. Anger can reinforce itself this way. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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Anger is often justified by its existence. The underlying message is that it could not have stemmed from anywhere other than where it appears to have. And perfectionists, seeing the world in black and white, tend to believe their anger is always reasonable. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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The perfectionist may live a life with justice at the forefront, challenging oppression by speaking out against it. And, they may see injustice everywhere, failing to consider how their own interpretations and biases influence their perceptions. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Sometimes, when in danger, we need to double down on anger, eliminating self-doubt to survive. But, at others, the pride of anger subsumes any hope for love. Standing on its grave is the masked perfectionist, who doesn’t even know they’re wearing a mask. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

It’s popular to think of anger, and rage specifically, as symbolic of chronic and systemic mistreatment. This is especially true in philosophy circles. Rage is thought of as a natural response to injustice. So, it’s often justified merely by its existence. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Since we live in a culture that overvalues fame, or talent more specifically, it’s easy for one to become full of themself, to feel entitled. Perfectionists, thus, tend to believe things are supposed to come easily to them. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

To use an example from a close friend: Rather than believing she’s owed an audience because of the time she spends on writing, she shifts her focus to her writing ability. At bottom, she believes she was afforded the gift of writing. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Perfectionists want to not think too deeply about their place in the world and take for granted their specialness. They want to see and judge weakness in others while blinding themselves to their hypocrisy. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

While seeing themselves as superior communicators, they place the responsibility of improving communication onto others. Thus, the loneliness. Psychologist Gill Straker wrote, “Addiction is a way of not relying on a person.” Arguably, so is perfectionism. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

Entitlement is greedy, placing the self at the center. And entitlement is distorted, with several flawed beliefs supporting it. In addition to the belief great work should be produced easily and always met with praise, entitlement redirects responsibility. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

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Rather than believing she’s owed an audience because of the time she spends on writing, she shifts her focus to her writing ability. At bottom, she believes she was afforded the gift of writing, which allowed her to experience deep pleasure from her work. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...

While everyone occasionally feels entitled, deserving of a privilege that’s unearned, perfectionists tend to believe whatever makes them special, whether a developed talent or innate trait, is a gift for the rest of the world, meaning they’re owed for it. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perf...