Yes, I’m already thinking about my Chinese food order for tomorrow.

Bari Weiss apparently spiked Sharyn Alfonsi’s 60 Minutes segment on CECOT for political reasons. Here’s her email to the news staff. Sharyn Alfonsi has more guts than every single beltway reporter.

When people from hostile countries start viewing your LinkedIn 😬😬😬 Or maybe I’m being too paranoid and they just want to endorse my “Management Skills”

When a reporter asks Trump or Susan Wiles about who gave the order to transfer Ghislaine Maxwell to a minimum-security facility a week after meeting with Todd Blanche and they come back with their BS “I don’t know!” They should follow-up with “Why aren’t you curious about that?”

Trump has declined so much that he can’t even make it out to a MAGA rally anymore, so he has to interrupt the Survivor finale to shout like a lunatic. Epstein files still coming out, buddy.

Trump’s address tonight is solely meant to distract and reset the narrative from a week where he wrote a despicable post about Rob Reiner’s death and his chief of staff confirmed that his name appears throughout the Epstein files.

Fun fact: I always carry a dreidel with me for good luck (and in case someone randomly challenges me to a dreidel duel). Happy first night of Hanukkah.

Waking up to the horrific news out of Australia. Two gunmen targeted a Hanukkah celebration on Bondi beach, killing 11 people. Outside of Israel, Australia is home to the largest population of Holocaust survivors. (1/2)

This is why I told the Biden/Harris campaign in 2024 that they should film videos in front of all the projects the Infrastructure Bill financed, to be loud about it bc we all knew the Republicans who voted against it were going to lie about what they did and take credit for it

Huge trove of photos from the Epstein estate being released. Link: www.dropbox.com/scl/fo/fq3vn...

Got this at an event. I said, “Gen Z water? Guess it’ll give me a…SLOW DRINK!” (Stunned silence ensued)

Starting today and all through 2026, whenever you address or talk about a Republican, make sure to always give them the title “Epstein Apologist.” So it’s Epstein Apologist Mike Johnson Epstein Apologist Nancy Mace And so on. Make them deal with it.

Dem fundraiser in the Hills. Of course I’m wearing my sunglasses at night. It’s my brand.

The Podbros and the Wonkbros have been screaming about the Dems needing fighters but when it comes to Jasmine Crockett, SUDDENLY they have a problem…I think we all know what’s at play here.

Re-upping this for reasons. (Reasons I hope to share soon) (This is what’s known in the business as a “tease”)

Bye, Alina 👋 👋 👋

Whenever I see these big business people who want to jump into politics and tout their complete inexperience with the system as a positive I always want to ask them: “So, since I have zero experience in your industry, would you hire me as part of your c-suite? No? Why not?”

The alleged Jan. 6th pipe bomb suspect told investigators that he believed the 2020 election was stolen. Now, who was out there promoting this lie? www.cnn.com/2025/12/05/p...

Waiting for more information on the identity of the alleged Jan. 6th pipe bomber.

She said we needed to have a serious talk about the treat situation

Although I hate how much ink (real and digital) has been spilled on certain figures, I’ve considered writing a thread tomorrow on the “Nuzzification of our culture”

Me too, Damien. Me too.

The amount of deviled eggs I could eat…

If you have to make three separate adjustments maybe backing up into a regular parking space isn’t for you and you should…I don’t know, just head-in instead?

Look, it’s beyond apparent that not enough people have read “The Scorpion and the Frog.”

MTG deciding to leave Congress the day before January 6th is almost too on the nose.

A little something for everyone in SoCal today: youtu.be/ZbLDH3Os8HU?...

Dick Cheney’s funeral is a great opportunity for the far left to once again say they couldn’t vote for Kamala (although weirdly, whenever pressed they always seem to claim they did 🤔) bc she had the AUDACITY to sit down with Liz Cheney who put the country over her party.

Don’t worry everyone, CNN and MSNBC will continue to carry water for the Republican lie about “well, why didn’t Biden release the Epstein files!!?”

You’re never going to catch me out there defending the Jewish space laser lady.

What was Trump doing during those hours he allegedly spent with an underage girl at Epstein’s house? This is an email from 2011 that Epstein sent to Ghislaine Maxwell which the Dem oversight committee just released. We need answers.

Yet another one of the Jan. 6th insurrectionists that Trump granted clemency to is being investigated for sex crimes. John Banuelos, who was accused of firing a gun into the air on Capitol grounds, is now being investigated for sexual assault and kidnapping. www.cbsnews.com/news/high-pr...

Republicans have been fighting to take away the ACA ever since Obama signed it into law. That’s why it was important to vote for Hillary in 2016 and Kamala in 2024. But too many people who supposedly cared wanted to play games instead, and here we are.

As Trump, JD Vance & Mike Johnson fight tooth and nail to guarantee people will go hungry, I think every enterprising citizen with a camera or phone should upload pictures of Republicans stuffing their faces this weekend. “They’re fine with you going hungry while they eat.”

Since my cat likes to conveniently “forget” I gave her treats 30 minutes after I give them to her, I’ve decided to take photographic evidence to PROVE to her that she has gotten a treat. However, this plan backfired because when I showed her this photo she said it was “Meow. I.”

BREAKING: Federal judge rules that the Trump admin has to pay full SNAP benefits for recipients for November. www.cnn.com/politics/liv...

The one thing you need to understand about elected Republicans is that CRUELTY is their primary motivator. You see it all the way down, from cutting SNAP to posts they hope will “trigger the libs” It’s all just to hurt people. They don’t want to help anyone besides themselves.

Wait, how is Fox still broadcasting from NYC tonight? I thought they’d be in the midst of evacuating on account of all the mass chaos and fire reigning down from the sky they were predicting as a result of one mayoral election.

Tonight’s elections make one thing clear: Trump is the biggest loser of the night.

Oh wow, what a timely reference. Can’t wait for your social media flunky to make some “Friendster” goofs next. That’ll really get ‘em.

Celebrating Halloween how I always do: putting out a huge pot of matzo ball soup with a ladle and a note for the trick-or-treaters to “Please take one!”

This arak is bringing me back.

This is a classic “I’m sorry I got caught, I’m not actually sorry,” situation because we all know he never had any plans to remove it on his own.

I wrote this during the last #NoKings day and it’s worth repeating: I think this is a great movement bc it gives people in red districts & suburbs a chance to come together and see that they’re not alone.

Bottom line: if you don’t vote, you are telling everyone that you are privileged enough to not be affected by whatever happens.

Why am I not surprised by this? “A flag with a Swastika on it has been found in Rep. Dave Taylor (R-Ohio) office” www.politico.com/news/2025/10...

Vile pigs. www.politico.com/news/2025/10...

Huge milestone! Speaks to the amazing work you’re doing, it’s definitely resonating with the audience!

After 738 days in Hamas captivity, the last remaining living hostages are finally home. 🎗️

They hate her because she’s Black. They hate her because she’s a woman. They hate her because her husband is Jewish. And they hate her because deep down, they know she’s right.