keep a large framed painting of one (1) friend in my house. but if you add more than one then it becomes this Whole Thing www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

billions and billions of dudes. possibly too many?? clearly more investigation into the dudes is needed www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

i knew i should've stayed an infinite being of pure energy; all the other infinite beings of pure energy told me but did i listen? NO because they were ANNOYING www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

what about mortifying defeats, or cringeworthy losses? how precisely do those factor in www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

in heaven you can do anything EXCEPT make heaven suck, and that's on account of how the main thing about heaven is that it doesn't suck too bad IF AT ALL www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

CHOOSE YOUR OWN POETIC ADVENTURE WITH EMILY DICKINSON (SHE IS UNAWARE THIS IS HAPPENING; PLEASE DO NOT TELL HER ESTATE) www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

Sherlock had gone "full Sherlock" when dressing this morning and even Watson had to be like, okay you're dressed like Sherlock Holmes, WE GET IT www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

i love conflict avoidance, and if YOU think conflict avoidance is bad then yeah maybe you're right!! www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

some days you just want to write a comic that will become instantly dated. greetings, future readers - remember when spending more than $100 on eating out was REMARKABLE?? www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

it's important to be good at it and if you have talent that can make it easier, especially at the start. hope this helps!! www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

i think you shouldn't be friends with someone if they won't proudly proclaim that you're definitely not the WORST dude www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

they're little bundles of joy that you can't talk to but need to somehow teach complicated concepts to, and they have knives for teeth but don't know it yet. what could go wrong www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

in truth there are simply two types of people: people of the first type, and people of the other types www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

wait, i ALSO have to forget all my old acquaintances? BUT THEY WERE SUCH A GREAT SUPPORTING CAST FOR ME www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

you can't spell "sexagesimal" without "ages"! and i have NO IDEA what that implies www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

heresy comix www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

what is this: charcoal mixed with saliva and - is that ANIMAL FAT?! oh boy, when i find out who's doing this they're in SO MUCH TROUBLE www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

MENSTRUATION IS DIFFERENT, AND ALSO THESE ARE DINOSAURS SO THEY'RE NOT USED TO IT, SO AS YOU CAN SEE THE FACT THAT EVERYONE IS DINOSAURS IN THIS COMIC IS DEFINITELY PAYING OFF IN THIS PARTICULAR INSTANCE qwantz.com/index.php?co...

Advantages to Being Old: a comic written by someone who is SO COMMITTED to growing old that if he doesn't do it he'll DIE qwantz.com/index.php?co...

Here are deadlines for order RAD DINOSAUR COMICS MERCH for the holidays!! 🦖🎁 topatoco.com/collections/...

sherlock we need you to invent a universal language!! and NO you don't get to say "mathematics is a universal language" because how do you say "i'm horny" in math?? you CAN'T, don't even TRY qwantz.com/index.php?co...

the image of the earth is off-screen. and big. real pretty. honestly it's a shame you can't see it qwantz.com/index.php?co...

to answer your question: yes, the pumpkins ARE out of season and look it qwantz.com/index.php?co...

t-rex's sinister neighbours return! or... WERE THEY THERE, JUST OFFSCREEN, THE ENTIRE TIME???? qwantz.com/index.php?co...

fixing this is going to require some... re-training qwantz.com/index.php?co...

i've heard of a "critical failure", but this is ridiculous qwantz.com/index.php?co...

man i HATE it when i respawn as a baby in the hospital at the very start of my life, and then some jabroni makes me die on the very first goomba www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

t-rex and dromiceiomimus in: "horse play" qwantz.com/index.php?co...

daaaaaaamn i can't believe all those other suckier dudes made me lose enlightenment. wtf www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

the case was called "Murder... a la Mode" and I DO NOT APOLOGIZE qwantz.com/index.php?co...

girl we have some bad news on your girlsecondarycancerlabreport. i'm afraid i have some bad news for some very specific cancer girlies qwantz.com/index.php?co...

behold! a vision into a dystopian world in which one might look down on Gamers www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

just casually tossing out "vampires but for other bodily fluids" like it won't revolutionize at least three distinct genres www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

utahraptor! i know this will only hurt me after I'm dead, and yet somehow, I think it's hurting me right now??? www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

you can't say you'd get used to them because they're giant skeletons with angry eyes!! and if that doesn't convince you, maybe i can remind you that these are giant DINOSAUR skeletons?? check and mate www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

are we to shorten it even further, to "Halloween", without the apostrophe? no, you'll pry that contraction marker from my cold dead hands... which is, at least, on theme www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

this is why true pros go on "hikes", which are walks in wilderness areas where there aren't any stores so you can't buy ANYTHING and can also sometimes DIE www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

okay teeth are probably worth it but COME ON www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

anyway bottom line is i do NOT have experience with successfully getting away with charismatic high-profile heists, so let's all look into someone else before even CONSIDERING me qwantz.com/index.php?co...

Timmy is BACK and ALMOST ON SCHEDULE qwantz.com/index.php?co...

throw in a killer robot, a mamma's boy, and a sprinkle of mean girls, and we are in BUSINESS www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

my new calendar presupposes earth's orbit has been adjusted from the old style (the planet taking a full 365.2422 days to complete a single orbit around sun) to the new style (a comfortable yet zippy 7) www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

*scarf* it's for science, so i can *om nom nom* like them a NORMAL AMOUNT www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

IT'S LIKE SENDING A LINK, BUT MORE WORK www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

the best unpopular opinions make everyone mad but nobody hurt: a truly victimless crime www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

utahraptor pay a guy to fix it. utahraptor you have to pay a guy when you mess up real bad qwantz.com/index.php?co...

as the saying will soon go: in the land of the omni-blind, the double-blind man is king qwantz.com/index.php?co...

We deserve and demand a special zone to be scrubbed clean in by patient machines, and I dare say it's criminal we are denied. www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

when a story sounds THIS good, you have to say "oh shit" www.qwantz.com/index.php?co...

Here's the sticker on T-Rex's computer (10 minutes in Inkscape)