End of the month. *Pays bills and credit card* Washing Machine: ‘SURPRISE!’ *promptly dies* John Lewis Online: ‘Good to see you again. How much money can we relieve you of this time?’ 😒

Miss Molly had her monthly groom today and as she was amenable to having her photo taken (usually she ducks when she sees a phone pointed at her) I thought I’d post a couple of shots of her

Had to pause after The Traitors and before Uncloaked to take the dog out for her pre-bed constitutional. Start to watch Uncloaked and the dog barks at the screen. Me: ‘NO! You do NOT shout at Claudia! 🤬’

Many of you know that I’ve been losing weight over the last 18 months and having enjoyed the Christmas and New Year period free of guilt, I’ve been back on it this week. For some reason, today I’m craving a treat (so will have one) and Claudia is speaking to me. I’m going to the shops.

So the only Christmas shopping I have managed to complete is the gifts for the dog 🫣

Triple Threat - Three versions of me reflected in an Anish Kapoor during a lovely afternoon with friends at Frieze London.

A picture that sums me up. Give me an audience and an Espresso Martini and there’s no stopping me! Captured in full flow by @balhamyte.bsky.social at my birthday celebration over the weekend

Birthday blooms courtesy of @balhamyte.bsky.social incorporating both of our wedding flowers (our buttonholes were white roses and thistles)

This escalated. Last Friday saw me walking home from the station after a night out singing Celine Dion. In French. I’m saying nothing more other than to confirm that there was indeed a strategic stop off at the McDonald’s conveniently situated between the station and home.

And for comparison, here was me in June 2024, versus where I am now, 8 months’ later.

As whist is now the new profile pic did some serious numbers on instagram, I thought it was time to update it.

I’ve told @balhamyte.bsky.social that this can be used as evidence of cruelty and unreasonable behaviour in the family courts 😂

It’s a cold, grey, rainy Sunday. Which means it’s the perfect time to sit on the sofa with a film that contains the perfect credits of: Color by Technicolor. Costumes by Edith Head. Miss Hepburn’s Paris Wardrobe by Hubert de Givenchy 😍🥰

Well it’s Burns’ Night so of course I was going to cook Haggis, Neeps and Tatties, with Cranachan for pudding. And a decent single malt to mark the occasion.

Anyone who knows me of old knows my hatred of the whole ‘Blue Monday’ nonsense and my insistence on unsubscribing from any mailing that references it in a bid to sell things. I used to post my annual score in the Bad Place so thought I’d bring it here. 2 mailing lists so far.

Had a real moment from my childhood just now. Walked into where I’m having lunch and working for the afternoon only to see Glynis Barber and Michael Brandon (Dempsey and Makepeace for you 80s kids) sat two tables away. The effort it took not to go over and say something to them was immense!

So yesterday X went, today Threads

Going away for Christmas is all well and good, but IT IS SO GOOD getting home to your own shower where you know the water pressure and know the thermostat works. A close second is being back in your king size bed with superking duvet after a week of a standard double with double duvet. 😂

Currently in an all-company, cameras on meeting One of the attendees asks if I’m okay as I seem to be rocking. Me - I’m fine, just on my walking pad. Cue hysteria from everyone followed by the CEO saying ‘To be fair you’re looking really good’ Me. Thanks, I’m going to turn my camera off now’ 😂

Bluesky now has over 10 million users, and I was #361,580!

#dogsatpollingstations Molly reminding you to cast your vote before the polls close at 10pm. Remember it’s your chance to have your say, no matter how you feel and if you don’t have your say when you can, then you can’t be part of the conversation afterwards.

The joys of living in South West London. On rugby international days it’s like the last days of bacchanalia on the high street 🙄

This may be a bit niche/car techy, but I’m looking to get a dashcam for my car (front and rear, will be hardwired in by the garage rather than needing removed regularly to be charged up) and wondered whether anyone had any recommendations or ‘avoid at all costs’? Thanks!

I was out for dinner this evening. I had an Espresso Martini as an aperitif which of course means it’s now 1:30am, I’m nowhere near sleep and so far I’ve bought new pillows and a pair of knee-length silk socks to wear with my dinner jacket to a birthday party next week.

Every year, I give thanks that this one is spectacularly unfussed by fireworks. She’s sat snoring on the sofa whilst fireworks are going off all over the place, even with the window open. Even taking her out for a walk isn’t a problem as she’s interested in the colours and flashes in the sky.

Message from the husband ‘What do you think to a no tree Christmas? Understated paper decorations. Small paper Christmas tree (50cm tall)’ Me: Sure, whatever you prefer Him: ‘I’m glad you like the idea as have already bought the tree’ Is it any wonder why 🙄 is one of my most-used emojis?

Driving @balhamyte.bsky.social over to a design client in Dulwich (trains are off, so chauffeur duties have been called on) and I’ve just caught sight of myself in the mirror. Half-zip jumper White shirt Jeans Gilet SUV parked outside. I couldn’t be anymore of a SW London dad cliché if I tried.

Having a very serious conflab between courses during our excellent anniversary lunch at Kerridge’s Bar & Grill this afternoon. 📷: @balhamyte.bsky.social as always

Today is my third wedding anniversary which is the leather anniversary. I bought @balhamyte.bsky.social a leather picture frame and put our favourite photo from the wedding in it (as we’d never got round to getting any wedding picture framed and put out) He, on the other hand, bought me this 😂

So an email drops into my inbox from my alma mater informing me that a reunion for my school year has been scheduled for March. Safe to say that it’s a hard pass from me. Whilst my school days weren’t traumatic, I do think that the past is best left where it is with this one.

50 years old and look at the plaster that the pharmacy gave me when I had my ‘flu jab earlier today 😂

Randomly and out of nowhere, this evening my husband decided to ask me how the Carringtons and Colbys linked together in Dynasty. Thirty minutes later, including crossing over to The Colbys, crossovers between the shows, recasts and retcons, I think he might have regretted asking the question.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/technol... So this could well mean the end of my Twitter journey

What did I look like ten years ago? Here’s me at my fortieth birthday party in August 2013. And then me on my fiftieth birthday in August 2023.

A sign that private schools are twitchy about the future. The alma mater is seeking donations, stating that providing bursaries is crucial to their charitable status. And for the record, I don’t approve of the loophole and it wasn’t my choice of school, but I didn’t have a voice in the decision.

The hotel pianist is currently playing a Cole Porter medley and the hotel has an epic staircase down to the terrace. I’m sat looking at the staircase and fervently hoping for this #iykyk

At the hotel I’m staying at, a car dealership has been holding an event for their top model (UK price £173k). I feel their staff have treated the hotel staff like trash. Am I overreacting contacting the brand’s head office to let them know, saying it’s enough to put me off buying their product?

So this is 50. And I celebrated it precisely in the way I told everyone I would after my fortieth birthday - by doing almost nothing and by running away for it. Having a lovely time in Portugal and as I’m married to a trained photographer, of course I’m going to have an official birthday portrait.

As it’s after midnight, I was allowed to open my cards. 🥰

It’s the last day of my forties, so I’ve done the grown up thing and run away for it. But waking up to views like this makes me think that sometimes running away isn’t necessarily the worst thing in the world.

That wonderful start to the week when you’re woken at 6am by the sound of the dog vomiting on the bedroom rug. In three different places 🙄 THIS IS WHY I FIGHT YOU FOR THE BONES YOU SCAVENGE ON THE STREETS. As an aside, chicken shops need banning. And as for the people who discard their bones 😡🤬