> Go through the 5 stages of grief > Get to Bargaining > The bargaining works and i actually get what i want ….the heck do i do now?

How to be a millionaire in the USA: 1. Become a billionaire

The 2 types of Pokemon Fans 1. People attracted to children 2. People attracted to animals

Can’t wait until #67 enjoyers find out about 69.

Youtube with content creators: "Say the word "h*ck" and your account will be vaporized." YouTube with advertisers: "You want to send a scam porn ad to 5 year olds? Go right ahead!"

"I applied so hard and got so far, in the end I wasn't even hired." ~ LinkedIn Park

Wind deniers be like: “Must’ve been the….um….uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”

Did you know there’s a real life version of Pokémon Go, where you can meet real monsters in your area and participate in challenging battles? Look up “Tinder”.

How to create a new madden game: 1. Take the previous madden game 2. Change the title 3. There is no step 3

"Why is your dick so small?" - Some girl, who doesn't even have a dick

How to become successful: 1. Wake up at 6am every morning 2. Take cold showers 3. Work hard 4. Be born into a wealthy family 5. Exercise

Virgin Companies now: "Nooooo I want an 18 year old with 25 years of experience!" Chad Companies then: "You’re 7 years old, no experience? Welcome aboard!"

Did you know that there's a strategy in battleship where you can win every single time, just by moving the pegs around in a certain way? Look up "pegging" to learn more.

How to get upvoted on /r/unpopularopinion 1. Post a popular opinion 2. Wait

My mom thinks I’m a loser with no life. What she doesn’t know is that I have a mansion, tons of food, am a professional at construction, and have a full set of diamond armor.

I can't wait for AI girlfriends to become real so I can tell people "I'm dating a model"

Medical commercials be like: "This medicine can treat your mild back pain. May cause depression, bleeding, sudden death, schizophrenia, and lycanthropy"