James Bond supervillains threaten to blow up the world with their big laser unless you pay them a trillion dollars. Real American supervillains embed themselves in the economy and threaten to cause a depression unless you subsidize their sex robots and the weird chatbots they use to avoid humans.

Just a normal day, why do you ask?

Please report ICE and share videos of their illegal actions here… oversightdemocrats.house.gov/immigration-...

I’m sure we are all shocked.

Government response to contempt inquiry: 1. Fuck you, we’d do it again 2. It was all your fault, you putz 3. Kristi Noem made the decision to keep flying.

Is Pete Hegseth wants to improve grooming standards, how about he starts by eliminating hair grease?

Melania Trump welcomed the Christmas Tree yesterday. In a white wrap of the finest puppy, she circled the wagon until her incantation to the Old Gods was complete. 113 crows burst from the tree, which smoldered, then erupted in flames as the birds lit on the First Lady’s shoulders. “Classy.” Fox.

Academics: our daughter did a research project and presented it at a workshop. Now, the person who runs the workshop series is using all her materials to do other presentations with an “additional assistance by” fn for daughter. Her advisor says tell Urban Soils Institute to get proper credit. ??

Ahh the guitars of 90s alternative. Stirs your blood. youtu.be/oPxxRzrpQWs?...

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, DOJ. It tolls for thee.

Got damn sounds like the perfect American “international armed conflict.”

Just a reminder that if you get an email from Barnes & Noble about buying signed first editions, I guarantee you there’s a local bookstore that has more. @squarebooks.bsky.social for example.

Dear Hive Mind: In the original tv series, wasn’t there a mention that Paul Drake had played for the Rams?

This is embarrassing.

It is 10:30 PM on the East Coast. There is no fucking Way Big Ten football should be on right now.

I just saw a reel of a comedian, pretending to be a pilgrim walking around the new world. “oh, this is nice. I just didn’t realize the whole thing would be outside.”

SNL Writer’s room as they watch Trump and Mamdani together: “motherfucker—now we have to redo the cold open.”

Her video is 17 minutes to find out she’s resigning on January 5.

Walmart, is you ok?

No, I have questions.

107 minutes into a meeting with the data analytics team, one of them highlights a cell in a spreadsheet and says, “This is interesting.” Reader, it was not.

Profiles in courage

High-ranking officials assured us repeatedly and in a rather condescending tone that the tariffs would not increase prices.

omg lol "Quiet Piggy" via amayes on the Tok www.tiktok.com/@amayes.me/v...

The President of the United States just called for Democratic members of Congress to be executed. "HANG THEM", he posted. If you're a person of influence in this country and you haven't picked a side, maybe now would be the time to pick a fucking side.

Up late. Wordle 1,615 5/6 ⬛🟩🟨🟨⬛ ⬛🟩🟩⬛🟩 🟩🟩🟩⬛🟩 🟩🟩🟩⬛🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 @lisaazbirder.bsky.social @propcazhpm.bsky.social @katgranz.bsky.social @bethinfrance.bsky.social

Someone should be talking to a lawyer. Like now.

Interesting. Consolidated appeals. Injunction stayed only as to ORNG federalization. The rest pends SCOTUS decision in IL case.

Huey Long: Every man a king! Donald Trump: Don’t be insubordinate!

TIL that a friend’s mother (an OBGYN) helped deliver Lisa Marie Presley, and was the one to tell Elvis “It’s a girl.”

“I will run America like a business.” (immediately loses $374bn)

The new Kavanaugh Color Chart.

Starts with a quick suck of the Fuehrer’s dick, then gets to the “we need secret police ackshully” on page 2.

Hooray for Hollywood That screwy ballyhooey Hollywood.

What does Amazon think I’m doing with my curtain rods and drapes?

What perfect album came out the year you turned 16? youtu.be/-AurKrXaFgw?...

Repost this everywhere you’re active on social media. Send to your friends and family who aren’t.

A good read about the societal impact, and generational trauma, that will not merely be the legacy of Trump, but is likely his goal. www.bloomsbury.com/us/i-saw-dea...

Wordle 1,611 4/6 ⬛🟨🟨⬛🟨 🟨🟩⬛🟨⬛ ⬛🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 @lisaazbirder.bsky.social @bethinfrance.bsky.social @katgranz.bsky.social @propcazhpm.bsky.social

Today’s read.

I just murdered a brown snake.

And now for the rest of the story. www.instagram.com/reel/DRDG0Js...

MIL: I got you guys tickets to see Jack Johnson next summer. Me: Oooooh, Circle Jerks are touring again.

Just a quiet Friday night working on a door knocking script for @heidijschmidt.bsky.social and her campaign to 'Get Schmidt Done' here in Maryland's district 31. If you've got a minute check out the campaign, maybe get involved www.voteheidischmidt.com

Hey Cornell. Maybe get better lawyers. Or a spine.

Trump lowering tariffs. I don’t understand. Why is he letting these countries off the hook for paying tariffs to US the American People?