14 was confusing hemorrhoids and herpes. I had him google photos to tell the difference 🤭 It turns out he meant hematoma. I think he's all done with Google for the day.

I've been to every state but Alaska and nearly every medium-large US city, many traveling alone as a woman. I've never felt unsafe from a US city. Annoyed with traffic, bothered by restaurant prices, disappointed by a few customer service failures, but never unsafe just for being in a US city.

Has Rand Paul even been to Chicago? I go through there periodically never a problem beyond a few impatient drivers tailgating.

Challenge your favorite political candidate to direct resources toward helping their constituents.

Sunset was so pretty tonight that everyone was pulling over to take photos of it.

Send your thoughts and prayers.

Do I dare to plant mint inside? It's so prolific I fear it might figure out how to spread between planters and murder the competition.

14: I'm going to pierce my ears to make you mad 🤪 Me: why would that make us mad? Your dad and I have pierced ears 14: I'll get my NIPPLES pierced 🤭 Me: want to guess why that's not a problem either? 14: 🤯 Me: you have Gen X grunge parents. You'd have better luck shocking us with straight As.

Oh good. We're at the Monty Python level of dark comedy when it comes to pushing women for things that are likely out of our control.

Should I start up virtual town halls again? Golden isn't holding any and I've got a lot to say...I suspect others do too.

It's #SundayCheckIn for 9/28. How was your week? How are you holding up? What do you need? What are you struggling with? What has helped? What kindness would help you? Remember to wash your sheets.

Starting in on the indoor winter garden with some just starting out potatoes (that got left too long in the cupboard) and a pineapple (grown from summer piña colada scraps). What else should we grow?

This should never be permissible. If they can do this to anyone, they can do it to you too...no matter how much you think they won't or can't do it to you. That's how fascism works, my friends.

14 has started describing things as to whether or not they are from "my century". 😐

We've added pecans to the mix.

We're deploying troops on Americans? What sort of fascist upside-down hell are we in? If you haven't been to Portland, Oregon it's...not dangerous. I would feel comfortable walking alone at 2am there. It's a quirky little big town with a lot of personality. Portland even has a haberdashery!

I don't understand why these people keep beating up on trans. Whether you look at this like who cares who someone else sleeps with or dresses, or that in any population there will be some X% where folks feel like they were born in the wrong body...why do they care how someone else lives to be happy?

When you have a long day in Portland but live in Rangeley, this is the view as you leave and when you come back. It's so beautiful here I feel like it's imaginary.

I realize I've been gone all day, but can someone tell me why there is a screwdriver in my sink?

14 has informed me he is now up to TWO hairs capable of reaching beard length.

I've had numerous people scold me, who generally is more of a severe understatement sort of gal, about my regular use of "fascism" in describing our current governance as "extreme" or "hyperbolic". Unfortunately, it's that it's fascism. And fascism thrives when you won't call it what it is.

Every reality dating show contestant to any other reality dating show contestant they'd like to be hooking up with: whhhhy are you still single? Nearly every viewer after a single episode, adjusting their "captain obvious" t-shirt: I'd be happy to answer that question for you

EBK telling me that I'm working too many hours because he can only find me in my office.

Look what I found.

I've been up since 4 am and just made it home. Tonight is definitely an in bed at 9 sort of night.

I'd like to take this break in trial to state: the phone that went off today in court wasn't mine.

I do not want my computer hardware to be a monthly subscription model, particularly not individual components. Same with any appliance in my home. Or my car. Or basically most of my life.

Rolling in after 7pm following a full day of trial and meeting with a client after, glancing at my email like... [If you need an email from me, I have over 700 from today waiting for me, so not going to happen. Sorry. I'm going to go collapse in a heap so I can do another day of trial tomorrow.]

Imagine how much harm is being done to this child. They're doing it in our name on our dime. We're paying for child abuse.

I'm in Portland tonight and every time I switch places I'm struck by how different city noise is from mountain noise. It might actually be louder in the mountains, but it's nature singing you to sleep. Portland is some of nature punctuated by folks who really want to share their life's soundtrack.

Earlier today I put an apple in my pocket, which I personally picked from a tree and was excited to eat tonight. There is no apple in my pocket now. I did not remove the apple from my pocket. Where do we think the apple got off to?

I don't particularly care for Kimmel. But what I really don't care for is a government that tries to censor comedians, especially considering that our comedians hold a mirror to our politicians better than our news does.

12 was committed to his pumpkin making it home.

I've been trying to find a way to put words to this. I don't know how to trust someone(s) to run our government when they don't deliver what they sell us on when they're in power, and fail catastrophically to defend democracy in times of crisis.

Haley Pond getting in the mood for a watery tart to start throwing swords.

It's #SundayCheckIn for 9/21. How was your week? How are you holding up? What do you need? What are you struggling with? What has helped? What kindness would help you? Remember to wash your sheets.

These binders are underwhelming for how long it took to make them up and the amount of toner they chewed through. Nonetheless, I persevered with these double-sided monstrosities.

I understand holding bigoted opinions - I don't agree with it, and it's awful, but you have a constitutional right to be an idiot. I don't understand why we are debating whether or not people are entitled to basic rights as a matter of policy that's seriously entertained. Get them a tent, indeed.

Very excited I paid $40 expedited shipping to get this product today. 😐

If someone had any salacious dirt on me and tried to extort me with it, I'd lean in to the dirt and tell the extortion bros to get bent. Unfortunately for me I'm not that exciting so I have to live my "screw you guys" vision in the hypothetical since no one cares that I need to paint my fence.

12 can already recite the ads about Susan Collins. Looking forward to the joy that next year brings.

Hell of a late life crisis that Putin is having. Can't he get a rag top Camaro instead of trying to convert Europe into his domain?

I think shrinkflation has hit my toner cartridges and I don't like it.

I know I'll be back to being sharp as a tack by tomorrow, but I am not today. Thank goodness a huge amount of my day is making up duplicate binders.

Just wrapping up a 22.5 hour workday where I worked through breakfast and lunch, had my husband bring dinner to my desk and I ate while working, all with a hacking cough so bad that I was sitting on a towel in case my have-given-birth bladder couldn't handle it. Do not recommend.

YOU ALL. I have absolutely failed as a Gen X parent. Apparently today 12 found himself in QUICKSAND. How did I not prepare him for quicksand? The peril my entire generation was over-prepared for (well, maybe mummies too)! In semi-related news, it seems our well has not run dry with the drought.

Never get in a land war in Asia.

If we're agreeing with folks we don't normally agree with politically, that should be a space to start working on getting us back to a space where we can disagree without the threat of murder or fascism.

If the first half of the 1900s taught us anything, it should have been that if a genocide doesn't shock you into tackling fascism, then fascism spreads like terminal cancer. We find way too much casual murder acceptable on this planet, deeply to our detriment.

Have we considered that comedy and free speech absolutism either may not, in fact, be back, or that there are multiple, mutually exclusive meanings for all of those words?