oh hey what’s up

never actually wore a hotel robe before

it’s been a minute #fcf

good news: we had fun last night

oh we’re gonna have fun tonight

sexted a boy “can’t wait to stuff you with my bug cock” kill me now

so I was fucking a guy in a bathroom at a party last night during the time change, came out, checked watch, and thought “wow I didn’t realize we were going at it that long”

still enjoying this hotel room

oh look a hotel mirror for hump day

we’re in a hotel room and I’m cheering

amazing what a bit of sunlight can do

finding it hard to concentrate on weekend work

“it’s an underwear birthday party, it’s gonna be chill and not an orgy” fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice… you’re not gonna fool me again

sexting before 7am is like, bruh, I’m bricked up but I need my coffee first to think of more inventive ways to say “I want to fuck you”

morning view #fcf

if I were outside this might be frozen… …would it be frozen? hey google what is the freezing point of precum anyway merry #fcf

boy it sure is handy sometimes to precum so much I don’t need lube

now where should this go #fcf

showing my meat to prove I’m not a bot

sure it’s #fcf but it’s also the beginning of Dry January

boosting platypus content

yes, yes, yes, one but okay, not… really?, no, yeah sure, not here, *gasp* what?!, okay!, very, ehh not really, wtf??, yes! and labeled!, id., id., aww, ish?, yes, WHAT DOES THIS MEAN the world may never know, lol no, id.

so, this is bothering me: the video quality sucks? why does it look like I’ve got Vaseline on my phone camera anyone got Bluesky tips for more High Quality Dick Content?

🎵 all I wanna do is pound someone’s son / I got a feeling I’m not the only one 🎵

back to the email factory when all I want to do is pound out someone’s son

just bouncing around, and then…

lol holy shit new platypus fact learned!!

this beast needs proper recognition! just look at it 🥵

[post on main gets 30 likes] alright a banger [dick pic here gets fewer than 500 likes] Shall this be the End of Patrick Platypus?

it's 🫨 perfectly 🫨 fine 🫨

still in my pajamas but excited for #fcf

the [hole pic] you [request] in jest, [gets sent] in earnest

Merry Christmas from your friends at Monotreme Enterprises, LLC

fat cock Friday pointed at you like a gun

look I love you people but I can’t take gooning seriously

My greasy dong asks you to label your horny posts here, loves. Click the little shield and add one. It's easy; I even do it one handed!

what’s up friends it is Friday so here’s that fat cock for the day #fcf don’t forget to apply labels to your fun sexxxy posts

frankly disappointed purported nudes of the CEO assassin had to come through the groupchat before seeing them on here

excited for the convention!

it is I, Patrick Platypus, here once again on #fcf

filed under: we love fat cocks that shoot

Time for another helping #fcf

yooo Deutschland what’s good in Berlin this week?

here’s that edged load as promised 😇💦 thanks for getting me to 1k so quickly! 🫶🏼

remembering the time I went up to a guy with a huge dick at Steamworks in Chicago, started playing with it, he said “what do you wanna do with it?” and said I don’t know what I can do with it, and he said “then what are you doing here” and I just kinda shrugged

a sunny disposition on this fat cock Friday #fcf

Big load energy

showing my meat to prove I’m not a bot

I want Bluesky to see this one 💦