If it gets much hotter my balls will be down at knee level - I think I quite like that idea, I love a nice set of low hangers! I hope one or two of you sexy beasts likes them too.

Ha! If I stand really close and take a snap with my luvverly new 9mm lens, certain things look bigger! Yep, my coffee cup is really tiny in real life.

Too hot to go outside or do anything, so a bit of editing - who wants to play Fuckopoly?

I have no idea what these doohickeys are for, but if you lot have got them, then I want one! Can I use this if one of those stupid websites asks me to prove my age, there is no way I am giving some dodgy company in the USA a copy of my passport - they can fuck right off.

Today’s special coffee flavour is ….

It’s Tuesday - summfink about tummies, titties? As long as there’s coffee, I’m naked and perving over all you gorgeous sexy fuckers here, then I’m happy.

I suppose it’s a bit pervy, licking my own armpits? Don’t care, if I could suck my own cock like I used to be able to do when I was young, I’d never leave the house!

I felt sorry for the little elf who does all the photo developing in my camera this morning, I am still testing out my new lens so I took lots of piccies. I like this one, my tits (the right one anyway) look nice?? I have lost about 6kgs and hope the tits stay, I like them!

This morning I woke up very early, had some coffee, then checked my bits were still working.

Mono-Monday kitchen, me in colour, so almost MM compliant?

It’s Monday again! The law says you have to post mono-nudey pics on Mondays.

Someone told me they needed an injection of energy in this hot weather - I d rather have an nice long, slow, balls-deep injection of cock, but then I’m a pervy old fucker who loves cock!

Thanks Mr Bezos - you evil, billionaire fucker. I saved 50 euroquiddollars on this lovely 9mm lens, so I got to keep that money and you didn’t get it! Yep, gonna enjoy playing with this one!

I’m going to have fun with this new lens!

Amazon Prime Day, so of course I bought another new lens for today's NNCC pics!

I thought it was Tummy Tuesday today, my brain is melting in the heat. First thing in the morning I look like I need ironing, maybe poltergeists are coming and drawing on me in the night?

Two of my favourite tastes - coffee and precum, can you guess what the others are?

It’s important to test the pool water, I haven’t got a clue what I’m doing so I just bung various chemicals in it and if the skin doesn’t get burnt off my balls then it’s all good!

Saturdays are good, I like Saturdays, I might even like the pop group the Saturdays, dunno, I’ve never heard any of their songs.

If I opened a coffee shop, the flavours would not be like that fucking awful Starfucks place.

I like tugging my titties, I’d like it better if you did it for me!

Just resting for a minute before I add the special flavour to my coffee - yes, there is a ‘u’ in flavour, it’s our fucking language, a clue is in the name, English, ooh that was a bit harsh eh? Some twat tried to correct my correct spelling on a forum, so I’m still grumpy!

Thinking…should I watch all the World Cup games or just the ones in Canada and Mexico, I’ve been to both those countries and they're very nice, I have never, and never will visit the other place - ha ha as if they’d let me in! Decoupling is tricky, but we’re going for it in the EU!

Two of my favourite tastes, coffee and pre-cum. I need some help filling my cup - volunteers?

Today I might just laze around, watch TV, drink coffee, maybe a beer or two later. I wanted a quiet day but it’s a fiesta day in our village so it’s noisy as fuck! Fireworks at midday? Yeah I don’t get it!

Why aren’t lemons called yellows and limes greens?Oranges are orange, so I’m gonna start calling my fruit by it’s colour, the reds are lovely this year, the pinks are just starting to ripen and the blacks are on their way - strawberries, raspberries, blackberries

I was pondering again this morning. I like to ponder while I’m drinking the life giving brew. If I could suck my own cock, I would of course, but I’d still prefer to suck yours.

Just standing in the sunshine, 15 minutes a day is enough for me, even after living in hot countries for 20 plus years I still get burnt to a frazzle if I expose myself for longer.

Coffee with unripe, green lemons? Yukk. Nope, those lemons will be lovely in a few months, but I ain’t not never ever putting them in coffee!

Simple pleasures - Coffee ✅ Naked ✅ Outside in the Sunshine ✅

I need some help filling my cup, or, just cum in my mouth and that will save some washing up!

I wonder if in some alternate universe there is a version of me, drinking tea, naked, early in the morning?

05:28, that’s a stupid early time to be awake! Oh well, waking up is a bonus, when you don’t wake up is when you have to worry!

Yep, I just checked and amazingly today is Monday, the Mono Monday Police, checking we are all posting B&W pics, won’t catch me!

Monday again? These weeks are whizzing by way too quickly.

Just put my coffee down for a minute…..

Somebody told me men can’t do multitasking - wrong!

First thing to do in the morning is check in the bathroom mirror that everything is still in working order. Then coffee of course.

It’s amazing what the Internet can tell you - "Coffee's history began in 9th-century Ethiopia with legend tracing it to Kaldi the goat herd discovering its energy-boosting effects". All hail the great Kaldi!

Apparently I am a 'radical-atheist', I don’t know how I can ‘radically’ not believe in something but it makes a change from being called a commie, radical-lefty or - oh , the horror, ‘Woke!’ Guilty as charged. Maybe I’m a radical NNCC member, an extreme nude coffee drinker?

Whoosh! What was that? That was another week flying past way too quickly, Mono Monday again, already???

Toady I will be pondering on the 2 transgender MSPs elected to Holyrood in first for Scottish parliament. Yay for them! I expect the Reform mob will be howling with rage, ha ha. Some of the Green Party new councillors are Vegan! Stay woke people!

Yep, Sunday is a good day for drinking loads of coffee, maybe a nice glass or two of red wine (I’ve got a nice bottle of Gran Reserva Rioja just begging to be opened). The weather here has finally got a bit more like Spanish May weather, so I’ll be moaning about the heat soon!

Sundays are nice, the rain has finished (yesterday was fecking nasty, thunder, lightning, plagues of frogs, sea monsters rising from the ocean…)

Stopped pondering and did something much more enjoyable - ah, that feels better!

More window pondering: If God really didn’t want men to ‘enjoy’ each other then why the fuck did she make it feel so nice? Why didn’t she give us 2 hearts like Doctor Who? Why does anyone care what a non-existent entity did or didn’t do?

.. standing by the window looking at the outside world, where all the hay-fever stuff is, bastard pollen! My allergies are much better now I am old, 25 years ago I had to have steroids, inhalers and fecking oxygen a couple of times, these days I just get streamy eyed and turn into a mouth breather.

Saturday! Even though I’m retired now I still think of Saturday as a day off! It’s a day for drinking huge amounts of beer and vodka and tequilla and….- but I don’t do that these days, so just a couple of beers and chill.

I have heard stories of a mysterious, ancient order called the #willywankaclub, I am prepared to undertake the dark, secret rituals of initiation into this sect - especially if spanking is involved!