Time flies when you're having kids

Did you hear that steve jobs died of smegma

Have You, (21M), Recently Been Affected By Food Poisoning, (17F), After Ingesting Raising Cane's New Chicken Tartare? Our Lawyers, (12F), Will Get You The Big Bucks, (1000M), Because We're Suing The Shit, (Shit), Outta Em. We're Gonna Cook Em In Court Until Their Internal Temperature Is (165F)

Beautiful marriage of tung and chungus present here

It's so sad that Keanu Reeves died of polio. What's polio? Polio balls

Keanu Reeves Dies Of Polio. After His Famous "You're Breathtaking" Speech, He Was Found In Iron Lung. He Contracted Polio From Puddle Water Via Silly Straw

Man Named Goatse Found Forgotten In Trunk Of Rotten Honda Accord. Studies Show He May Have Been There For Centuries. Whoever Opens It Next Will Get Totally Trolled (John 3:16)

Kid named computer: Okay

Damn daniel!! Spit on that thang!!

In a large city I don't know well getting on and off trains that I don't know the destinations of and I couldn't be happier

i like my Coffee how i like my Eeffoc. Bacwards

um... "Kill la Kill?" That anime's name is... problematic. Could you please call it Unalive la Unalive instead

"Bluesky Terrorist" Shot Before They Could Post Eleventh Copy Of Same Mediocre, Unrelatable Image In A Row

Cracker is the new mustard

Haha sudden lockdown alarm middle of class hoorayyyy

My new band poop clumbus is gonna COLON-ize your earholes

Shane Dawson, CEO Of Exxon Mobil, Found Having Sex With Cognitohazard

Jesus Christ didn't need "good boy points"

Haha Jonathan you are 8 AM AP Chem Test

You stupid. [No I'm not] What's my plus name? [Jeff] You jeff

Sometimes I leave the fork in the microwave just to feel something

My final goal as Eric's Fantasy is to quote so many bible verses that people forget that the bible wasn't originally the inside joke that I will make of it

Am i fucking crazy how was this account created November 30 2024 thats INSANE i swear ive had this account for like 6 months max it feels like my plentiful ericisms have only blessed this god(John 3:16)forsaken website for like half a year, not a year and a half, what the Fuck

Make me famous

"My name is." -Jeff 19:21

Erics fantasy is now a bible verse page. Song of Solomon 8:10

Man Named Goatse Found Forgotten In Trunk Of Rotten Honda Accord. Studies Show He May Have Been There For Centuries. Whoever Opens It Next Will Get Totally Trolled (John 3:16)