Whenever I go out drinkin w/my frens people always ask me if I have a podcast bc I’m kinda cray & funny. So now I ask in advance when talking to strangers if they want the name of my podcast & responses range “yes!” to “umm,ok” so I tell them my podcast is called I’m Just Kidding!

I really did show my tits off all over New Orleans this past weekend

Went to mapleleaf last night I was heavily flirting w/some long-haired blond from AZ he’s like did u go to ASU I’m like yeah bro undergraduate 199x he’s like “the year I was born!” I was like come see me in LA & he hands me his phone to put in my number but he never hit sent text. 🫣😱

Running

This folding bike has been my ride here for the last two days it’s so fucking rad and I don’t use that word lightly

Prebunch my friend starts to get very crabby (I.e., woman on the verge-y) after a couple of days so I have to walk on eggshells until she smokes weed or whatever so I’m on the porch smokin and drinking a mornin glass of rose

Breakfast of champions. Yesterday was legit one of the best days of my life. Something entered my body. I danced my ass of for 8 hours straight

Who do you have to fuck around here to get a repost ?Jeezus

Rate my ass

Day 2 of Jazz Fest was amazing topped off by incredible set by Stevie Nicks in the rain the crowd was 🔥🔥🔥 all day and never danced so much on my life I enjoyed myself unironically

I deactivated bc some oomph was cunty in response to one of my posts so I was like, “why should i waste my beautiful mind?” Good vibes only

I’m at Jazz fest and a bit boy crazy ngl

The puke cunt republicans sure are salty about Virginia on twatter

Anyway this is LA. Anyone of a certain age who looks good but claims they don’t get (at least) regular Botox is lying thru their teeth. who cares?

Why to people get all judgmental like about injectables? Or anything people spend their hard earned $ on? My attitude is be a slut, do whatever you want. Heck I’d inject fetal tissue that was still twitching if I thought it’s make me look 20 mins younger.

It’s been 4 episodes but the Rhode Island bitches are already top tier househos

My Finnish aesthetician is coming next week. Thank God I need a touchup. I trust him implicitly I would let him sick at any needle in my face. The proof is in the pudding so to speak. what the fuck else am I supposed to spend my disposable income on?

I wasn’t sure if this uploaded with music. If it did, this is my favorite song of all time I love Ryan so much

Happy 4/20 even tho I don’t have any 4/20 frens on SM anymore which is depressing

In my career I’ve often had to deal with government employees often in a adversarial settohg. But these people wouldn’t let you buy them a sandwich because of their ethical obligations. Seeing like this just manes me sad

This person doesn’t know what he’s voting for. BWAHAHAHAHA. They’re not good, they’re stupid.

If you say any of these words you’re a fag Pretty Cute Chardonnay

The Israeli govt is as bad as ours. File under: no shit, Sherlock. But when your posts are essentially, “you know maybe Hitler had a point” but you think it’s ok bc you couch it using terms like Zionism, you’re a scumbag, darlin.Anyway, I haven’t seen any of this from oomphs, just generally on BS

These people are literally politically aligned with MAGA and the Republican Party. And they are fuckin R-worded

The Bluesky iPad app is randomly attaching weird images to my posts

Now I’m remembering why I left Bluesky. The antisemitism masquerading as virtuous leftist politics is too much for me. At least on the site formally known as Twatter, most people don’t pretend to be good.

Work colleague said I “text like a 17 yo” and I’m just like, thanks, bro!

I can’t imagine caring about anything less than Atrimis or whatever

Anyone know any curses or hexes, ancient or otherwise? I’m looking for dark arts practitioners only, babe.

Filtered marihuana ciggie or whatever