if my book ever gets a translation to any language i'm telling the translator to just do whatever. add a random crucial plot point that changes everything. i'll pretend it's always been there but that it's only illuminated once free of the shackles of the english language

getting a mid, 7am breakfast with your friends at a casino restaurant with an indoor waterfall on a monday really sets a bewildering vibe for the rest of the week

please tell me which books you conspicuously set out so people ask you about them

not ashamed to say i organize my books to make the ones i want guests to ask me about the most visible #mytruth

nobody will humble you quite like a copyeditor

when the "vintage market" is all beeswax soaps etsy jewelry and ai-generated designs on plastic coasters

how it feels every time i say "my book"

woke up to a world without baseball

"it's a dead ball" oh you mean a sick fucking trick shot?

do the baseball people know we all have work tomorrow

seeing tv ads for the first time in forever (world series) (go jays) and it seems like the only things for sale anymore are weight loss injections and ai assistants (unclear what the assistants actually do other than replace you as an employee/friend/family member/person)

probably feels soooo good to blind yourself with quicklime

much love to all jewel thieves. didn't know that could still happen but glad it can

if the jays take it all then it really is the american century of humiliation

the lion doesn't concern himself with the opinions of other cooler and smarter lions

macy rodman the genius that you are

you would, wouldn't you

Please take ONE Tootsie Roll.

partner is leaving for a week so i'm gonna pour a glass of whiskey and watch dogville alone for the first time and just see what happens to me

regular all-staff work meeting kept coming back to the topic of protests and staying safe and knowing your rights like oh things are WEIRD weird aren't they if this is what coworker talk has become

newfound appreciation for this lorde album

everyone stop watching the Hot New Movie until i've seen it

weapons should have been a really great fucked up middle grade horror novel that leaves a strange impression on you but you can never quite remember the name of. roald dahl-ass movie (complimentary)

thoroughly broke my smartphone (for the first time ever) and so i just ordered a flip phone catch me playing snake and taking shitty pixelated nature pics

lit mag rejections should automatically open a new browser tab with this little creature already cowering and trembling

since i was a small child my dream has always been to be misunderstood

you guys ever hear music? song of the summer, music

science fiction writers please be careful of the torment nexuses you dream up these days i think tech ceos are just looking for ideas atp

these two paragraphs just cured my imposter syndrome

putting my partner on the dedication page so i have about a year to come out to my parents before my own book outs me upon release. which would honestly be very funny

contractually obligated to revise the book i wrote of my own free will

i know confidentiality is part of their whole thing but they should livestream the conclave

guys i haven't heard from the falconer in a while i'm getting kinda worried

new career goal is to be interviewed by dua lipa she's so good at asking authors questions what's that all about

the suburbs are so scary i've been walking for 20 minutes and there's no end in sight i need a dowsing rod to find a café

new piece in @havehashad.com today!!! I think it’s my favorite piece I’ve written in the last, like, year Honored to have it be in my favorite lit mag, skull Number 10 baby!!! 💀 www.havehashad.com/hadposts/car...

hope we're all still reading novels by then

is Saint Juan Diego’s tilma stunt the first outfit reveal to be officially declared a miracle?

what do you mean that one-day no-demands no-target caveat-riddled boycott didn't work

my editor's like "it's good to make sure there's nothing compromising on your socials" before book announcement/launch and i'm just pretending my tumblr doesn't count as "socials"

no idea what to put on my author website maybe i'll just link my playlists

abracadabra abra oo nana, that me espresso, i'm so Julia, a puh tuh puh tuh, etc. i call this the "silly phrasing echolalia" school of pop

i do believe in dragon new warm mountain i really do

sure die hard is a christmas movie or whatever but you should be watching long kiss goodnight for the holidays instead

well it's no tumblr that's for sure !

the gays in my town are all pivoting to "vintage reselling" and they keep buying the same brass dolphin from each other

Small Hours