We still await Deevid’s shock that we were promised. #thearchers

We never did meet the Gills did we? Eternal silents. #thearchers

Adult offspring leaves home shock horror. #thearchers

Josh is Gen Z. He will already have noise cancelling headphones which he spends most of his waking hours wearing. #thearchers

Completely shocked by Monty Don making fart jokes on #gardenersworld, on the BBC of all places!

Preparing for an evening of avoiding #comicrelief #thearchers

If Esme is going to be a fixture maybe her accent will stop bouncing around like Zebedee. #thearchers

We’re in good company today chaps. #thearchers

No Brine, Debbie’s day rate ascended into the stratosphere. Ambridge can’t afford her any more. #thearchers

I wouldn’t give much for Brine’s blood pressure today. #thearchers

The B word discussion. Burden. Always difficult. #thearchers

Kate living near Feebs would be the last thing Feebs would want. #thearchers

Has Jill become a silent? #thearchers

What is all this nonsense about the telly? Just watch it ffs. #thearchers

Cake forks. Of course. #thearchers

“Romantic getaways with Erik”. Occasional shagfests hopefully. #thearchers

The idea that Roars would refuse an invitation to pulled pork is unconvincing. #thearchers

Just getting started? She’s been doing it for 20 years. #thearchers

The woman is obsessed with cheese. #thearchers

Shocking scenes as Wiwyum shows empathy in #thearchers

Tone getting the message from his family he isn’t good enough, like he got from his mother all his life. #thearchers

Just like Josh, the family is horrified that an adult offspring might move out and look after themselves. #thearchers

Spuggy? Come on. #thearchers

Brine is a “pull yourself together” kind of dad. #thearchers

For the Good of the Faamly. #thearchers

I can clearly no longer allow my wife or my servants to listen to #thearchers

Gawd, not Celia Sparrow. #thearchers

When the boat’s arockin don’t come knockin. #thearchers

This is Deevid setting up Chris’n’Hannah like Brine set up Rex’n’Alice. #thearchers

Hellin has known this bloke for about 3 days and she’s contemplating throwing everything away and escaping to Scotland. Madness. #thearchers

Don’t people google potential partners these days? #thearchers #stabbyhelen

Hoho, Brine is trying to set up Alice and Rex, what larks! #thearchers

Deevid and Brine love rugby so much they’ve never been heard discussing it in the entire history of #thearchers

I heard the Bull has a good car park where Chels could store her van whilst it’s being done up. #thearchers

If only there was a way of finding people who want a new job when you have a new job to offer. #thearchers

“We have a job vacancy. Should we advertise it?” #thearchers

“Tom took it well”, as Nocasha said to Pol Pat after their latest pegging session. #thearchers

Chels is always good value. #thearchers

Krustie: “It shoudda bin me.” #thearchers

Pip: “Mum and Dad will be devastated that a son in his 20s wants to leave home.” #thearchers

OK Josh is being horrible but Pip is a flake. #thearchers

I never thought I would see the day when a member of the royal family is in the cells. Regardless of behaviour I just didn’t think it would happen.

“Wealth management.” A profession about to be eliminated by AI apparently. #thearchers

Linda being totally unreasonable. Stella drives a long distance to a full time job. Of course she can’t join the speed camera rota. #thearchers

Just because Alice seems desperate to get in Rex’s knickers doesn’t mean that Rex automatically fancies her. #thearchers

We need to meet Nick the Nuts. #thearchers

Rex is boring but decent unlike his rackety brother who I wouldn’t trust as far as I could throw him, and as he’s an ex rugby player that wouldn’t be far. #thearchers

Ruuuaaridgdhdhh thinks he can just wing it. College course? Pah! Detail? Nah. #thearchers

The Zodiac! I remember it well. Hot and cold running walls all night. #thearchers

So chaps, the feeling is that Brine didn’t do it, and he’s covering for someone else? Although the aftershave is pretty telling. #thearchers