Jackbox Games' Job Job has a 100% success rate in making me cry-laugh

For your consideration, my Firebreathing Alignment Chart.

Secret Lair knows what I'm about.

Yo Disney We've had a lot of good memories over the years Why do you do this? And no, I'm not going to pay $30/month JUST for ESPN.

Dance with the one who brought you.

And I oop

First Powered Cube draft: scored a 6-3 with this hyper-aggressive deck. Would have played fewer lands if I had the spells to do it.

Me: "I don't need to draw any more lands." MTG gods: "DID SOMEONE SAY MORE LANDS"

Played Annie Flash last night, and for the first time, it sputtered. The deck's real good at spinning wheels, but if it doesn't draw the right pieces, it has a hard time turning that wheel-spinning into pressure. Still a ton of fun, but I finally have meaningful feedback for upgrades!

How do you build for open-ended commanders? I'm looking to overhaul Niv-Mizzet Reborn, and there's not enough multicolored-matters support for that to be my Plan A.

Local radio station was giving away a shed, and that feels like a perfect encapsulation of life in the Midwest

Annie Flash steals another win! Rocketing up my favorite deck rankings. It's always doing *something*.

To oppo: thank you for letting me play this out, and I'm sorry.

Ironic: accidentally buying a second copy of Clever Concealment because the first one was too well-hidden

Me in the corner rocking back and forth as MTG x TMNT spoilers flash on-screen muttering to myself "It's not for me but it is for someone it's not for me but it is for someone"

The NYT Connections game always has one group that's "Words that would belong together if they were different words"

Five years ago, in response to doomsaying about Secret Lair: The Walking Dead, I scheduled this reminder to check in on the health of Magic five years later. It's more profitable than ever.

Two of my originals are looking for new homes: Linden, the Steadfast Queen 18"x24" oil on canvas Kenrith Family Portrait 30"x40" oil on canvas There is no current price in mind, and I would be happy to forward any offers to the current owner of the paintings. #mtgart #mtg

Not a bad hit!

First 2HG draft of the weekend was a 3-0! My half was this sweet artifact deck chock-full of value.

Everything in the Arena store costs 5x in gold what it costs in gems. Premier and traditional drafts cost 6.7x, which I've never liked. Pick-two draft throws the numbers off even more, at 8.3x. Can't we just have a single consistent conversion rate? Unless the confusion is a feature, not a bug...

One last Edge of Eternities draft to prep for MagicCon before Spider-Man drops tomorrow...

PIZZA TIME

In Commander last night: "I'm going to Crop Rotation for Field of the Dead." <Find a card that starts with "Field of" and grab it> <Notice several turns later I had tutored for Field of Ruin instead> Whoops

"Sorry we leaked your data. Here's a dollar." –ParkMobile

All EOE'd and Cube'd out, but it's too soon to play SPM. Guess I'll just find new ways to break Arena and see how large I can make my deck before things crash.

✨Epcot✨

Calories don't exist on vacation.

I played my first Pick-Two Draft yesterday for the Midweek Magic. What surprised me was how *fast* the draft was. From P1P1 to deckbuilding in under 6 minutes.

Charley horses make terrible alarm clocks.

The Arena Open Day 2 opening draft is in the books, and I'm pretty happy with how the draft went!

Day 2, here I come!

Went back through my Switch's photo library and found some Animal Crossing gems.

I'm nothing if not consistent.

After mistakes were made with a P1P1 Infinite Guideline Station, this absolute pile somehow scrounged up 5 wins.

Hmmm... Should I update old decks or build new ones...

First trophy of EOE! Deck was a ton of fun to play.

Had this engine rolling for a few turn cycles of tonight's commander game. As long as I could draw a card on someone's turn, Niv would commit a crime for Duelist, which would create the second draw for Pyromancer. I didn't win, but I was the fun police for most of the game.

The past 16 hours have just been a litany of flight delays and cancelations, surprise road trips, and last-minute hotel stays. If I sit next to a shower curtain ring salesman on the plane, I'm walking home.

First draft of EOE: 4-3 in Diamond with mediocre creatures supported by decent removal. Though I think at least one opponent got hosed trying to splash a third color off of Lander tokens...

Last time I saw the Rainbow Crosswalks, they were just rainbow. They've picked up a few new colors since then!

Prerelease time!

Having "The Turn" with Insidious Roots in Standard is especially sweet when the opponent you're tormenting is on Omniscience. Taste of their own medicine and all that.

Arena Open Day 2: Draft #1 is in the books! Took a while to find the open colors, but I think this deck's decent.

Day 2, here we come!

Happy birthday to these two!

There's a man playing accordion at MSP airport. Keep on being iconic, Minnesota.

Okay I might have undervalued The Sibsig Ceremony. (2-1)

If I won the lottery, there would be signs