It's Saturday again already. Where did the 4300 km go?

Yeah, so there's like zero chance we'll summit #Everest today.

Sure, frequent hotel stay awards are nice, but we really want taco trucks parked out front.

It would be steak night at camp if it were Saturday. It's Tuesday.

How to make a $4 pizza taste like a $16 pizza: Add $12 of ingredients

I'm treating myself to chicken and waffles without waffles this morning. (I ran out of peanut butter)

Remember the meeting between Liddle Marco and Sergei Lavrov? Lavrov has been accused of sabotage and is persona non grata in the Kremlin. This is because of the strong talk Lavrov gave to Rubio, which the Kremlin says was not Putin's position. They say it jeopardized a Trump-Putin meeting.

Side wager: it happens on a ramp

Narrator: they weren't

I can see Trump's losses of last night from my back porch. There's a TV out here. I guess I should bring it in for the winter.

UPS plane crashed at 17:15 local time.

I knew I recognized that evil man's face from somewhere

Nice Daylight Saving Time ya got there. Be a shame if something happened to it.

They're starting to put Charles on money and I don't know if this or his bad teeth is funnier.

A helpful person said I should go fly a kite nsw

That's the best coffee I've had all morning. Incidentally, it's also the first coffee I've had all morning, and probably the first coffee made on the whole block.

The microwave blinked the correct time at midnight, but every blink since has been wrong.

What did everyone use their "extra" hour for today? I made a fantastic breakfast - and took the time to savour it.

Nice to see you again, @fagankara.bsky.social Good morning!

Hurricane Melissa is currently a Category 3 headed for Jamaica and Florida. Expected to get stronger and inflict approximately $12M in improvements to Mar-A-Lago.

"Why'd you make so much?" Because.

Remember MAD Magazine where you folded the back page a certain way to reveal a hidden message? I kinda do the same with my posts 😁

To avoid the rush of others likely to follow, I am having it for breakfast

After we're done getting rid of the Orange menace and fascism, can we work together to get rid of Axe Body products?

It was another long week at work, which is pretty standard. But my body is telling me I need homemade chicken fried rice, and it just volunteered me to help make it.

Little-known fact: Kenny Rogers' hit song "We've Got Tonight" was actually about the last day the McRib was on the menu

It must suck for them and their plan for us to riot, when we're not going to riot.

Who's going to tell Trump that Al Capone's riches aren't in the walls of the East Wing? Geraldo?

If you've seen one Rapture, you've seen them all.

Imagine my surprise when I pressed the lower button by mistake

If Alberta wants income taxes from me in 2027, the deadline for them to ask is December 15th of this year.

Damn it, George Soros, I wanted Direct Deposit.

Of course, the prudent step is to order two to-go lasagne because the first one might be defective.

Separatists just don't get it. #AbPoli #CdnPoli lethbridgeherald.com/news/lethbri...

Crazy busy at work, but I'm still here!

I signed the #ForeverCanadian petition in #GrandePrairie today. One step closer to 300,000 signatures!

Stainless steel travel mug, meet SOS pads. SOS pads, meet stainless steel travel mug. Game changer. No more soaking it in various solutions to get it clean. I grew up with these things. #coffee

Let it be known I don't shy away from asking the difficult questions

Has anyone considered that Trump is suffering from gold spray paint toxicity?

You're not from here, are you?

I'm thinking no, TimDifferentNumbers

Each hole of Trump's Gaza golf courses will have views of where the hospitals used to be.

"Well, don't put me in a position where I have to tell you to toast and butter the English muffin in an Eggs Benedict! What sort of a monster are you?"

Not knowing how to make friends, Pierre Poilievre lashes out at Mark Carney for making friends by meeting people face-to-face.

A win was crucial for Ukraine

Someone tell Trump he didn't win this golf championship before he claims he did. #RyderCup

Who's going to tell Trump that Home Depot is out of plaster sconces and gold spray paint?

The criminal masterminds planning to steal all the gold in the Oval Office are in for a big surprise. You won't need dump trucks, rail cars, or Caterpillar loaders.

The best way to handle datacentres is to have them build housing and infrastructure first, then have years-long studies about whether building datacentres are feasible.