The new M&S chocolate peppermint bark cookies are INCREDIBLE.

A guy in Uniqlo told me he loved my tshirt

We have enough Lewis Capaldi songs. We really don't need any more thanks.

I've made myself a coconut water, beetroot and matcha beverage and ladies, I would not recommend it.

Labour really are doing everything they can to be universally hated on all sides. It's almost impressive

Someone told me it’s January in 8 weeks and they’re dead now.

Doing a bit of work on a Sunday arvo lads. Capitalism never stops.

I'm looking for investors in my new App which reminds you that you ate beetroot the day before and that you are in fact, not about to die.

Picked up these stunners at the outlet for £35

When I worked on the radio chart show I interviewed Lily Allen who, now we know, was in peak addiction era and she was a horror. Wouldn’t look at me, zero interest in the interview or promoting her album. The radio plugger was so apologetic

🚨Someone I follow on Instagram has put their Christmas tree up🚨 *unfollow*

Turns out Yaris Hilton had 'wet spark plugs' and basically needed a good pumping to get going. Bless her.

Been in meetings since 7am lads What a Friday treat

Yaris Hilton turns on but the engine won’t start so that’s fun. I can’t sort it out tomorrow so that’s gonna be a fun Friday job

Which Smiski are you today?

Get outside this morning if you’re able. The light is beautiful

Get those SAD lamps out girlies. We’re in the dark by 5pm season

Never expected Danny Robbins to be a catalyst in the breakdown of Lily Allen’s marriage

Why am I getting targeted adverts for Seth Rogans range of incense cones plz? The subject alone feels AI made

Went to a functional fitness class and then ate 6 chocolate digestives Namaste.

The German company that makes the mechanical ladder used in the Louvre heist has used the image to advertise, with the text 'When you need to move fast' 10/10 response, no notes

I'm a highly experienced senior digital producer and LinkedIn thinks this job is perfect for me. Darling. Respectfully but, WTF.

The internet’s boyfriend 💞💖 #CelebrityTraitors

The morning glow

Sorry you've been a victim of fake news. I said this morning to @vicderbyshire.bsky.social that the Green Party had passed 123,000 members. A couple of hours later it's out of date. @greenparty.org.uk have 126,000! 🎉🚀 Join.greenparty.org.uk

Todays plan. Big Sainsburys (with the Lindor pick and mix bar), big TKMaxx, roast dinner, catch up on MAFSUK. Stunning.

Me patiently waiting for the iPhone 17 pro max in orange to come back in stock

Why do I always feel awkward pressing the stop button on the bus please?

It’s Friday tomorrow and I have five meetings. FIVE.

Have you updated the deck? Is the deck ready? Have you made sure that Susan has seen the deck? Which version of the deck are we working on? Can you share the deck? Deck deck deck.

Oh good, another email from HMRC saying I owe them some more of my money. Wonderful

Homosexuals who drink Costa

Got to be in London early tomorrow for work and my train ticket is going to be £60 SIXTY POUNDS FOR A ONE HOUR JOURNEY.

Yes I wore a Spice Girls tshirt to the office today and yes everyone loved it

Yeah this is deffo a cold.

Ok so I think I have a cold. And I’m on the train to work. I’m sorry everyone, I thought it was my allergies

Ah yes, I see we’re in the season where some people are wearing shorts and some in scarfs and big coats.

Green party reaches 100,000 members for first time after Polanski becomes leader

lol that it’s Monday again?!

Spotted this tool jus walking through a town centre earlier. He was also wearing a Union Jack waistcoat

Do I want to start my week with a 6.15am fitness class or wallow in bed till 7am?

Made some choc and salted caramel cupcakes which also happen to be gluten free because I’m really great and inclusive

Going for dinner with my PT tonight which somehow feels like a trap.

Six magpies this morning lads

There’s a guy opposite me on the train doing the news paper cross word but he has a notepad to write down his guesses and only adds them to the grid when he’s 100% sure they’re correct. This is incredibly hot for some reason

Not me working yesterday when I'd actually booked the day off.

I've ordered an air purifier as my dust allergy is out of control. This feels like a real, boring, adult purchase.

The new TS album is better than the last one TBH.

Not someone on Scruff messaging me and asking me if I remember them from the date we went on FIFTEEN YEARS AGO. Darling, I don’t remember 15 days ago.