Paul Hardcastle radio and playing Balatro is a vibe

Listening to classic rock music Me: This is really good. I wonder who this is. Music: *Ripping flute solo* Me: Oh. Nevermind.

The fact that I manifested this into existence is one thing. The gay community and the non-book girlies/gays/theys loving it is a whole other level.

I often wonder what kind of drama is happening in the YouTube royalty free workout music space

AI can't do math

Him: You should go play games on your switch Me: First I'd need to find it, charge it so it can power on, then the OS will need to update, and that will take forever to download and then another forever to install, and then the game I will want to play will have updates. I'd rather kill myself.

Not wearing a shirt or a tank top under a sweatshirt feels illegal

This food is so good it has me critically thinking about the spice trade

THIS SUPREME COURT IS SO WEIRD

We are a no shoes household and sometimes socks are a fucking prison

I had two toasted slices of my sourdough for dinner and then washed my face for like 10 minutes. Sometimes things are good.

November 16, 2025 - this year's first Mariah Carey

What's crazy is Trump doesn't drink or do drugs. He's doing a sax solo on Clinton off a diet coke and lime - Danny Goodwin

You mean to tell me that Ptarmigan starts with a P?

"The doctor said it was the best result he has ever seen as a doctor."

Being reluctantly loved

If you'd only ever seen Benicio del Toro in Excess Baggage and then watched One Battle After Another I bet you'd be confused

Two Time Loser Cuomo

February 11. Never forget

Fuck Dick Cheney. Rot in hell.

This little man kills me

I desperately wanted to ask my dentist if he dreams (has nightmares) of disembodied mouths and or teeth but I figured it was inappropriate

Robin Hood confirmed that I was A. attracted to a cartoon and B. not a furry

A short, sentimental list about Key Chains by mayonnaise hands

If you don't think Afghan Hounds look like Judith Light we can't be friends

Did anyone ever realize that Ash Ketchum's last name foretold his future? He had to Catch 'Em all. Get it? Katchum. Catch 'em.

Are people really out here raw-dogging YouTube?

Turning off uBlock Origin and refreshing a YouTube page is fucking frightening.

Fall has sprung

Points to Angela Lansbury on the TV: Is she still alive in real life?

While it's sad she died, it was pretty funny that Diane Keaton's wiki page cited that she died in the Los Angeles fires. Riffraff will riffraff until the cops show up.

Filthy Frank foretold the prophecy and will forever be culturally relevant

My reflux pills live in my nightstand next to my vibrator

We forced Jimmy give up his peanut farm and now Trump has a website where you can give him money

Him: Did you see the harvest moon last night? I text you about it. His Text: Moon big

Ya' know there really is something to be said about drinking a soda out of a 32oz styrofoam cup when it's 90 degrees outside in October

To the lovely lady at the Seattle Airport horking in the bathroom stall next to me... I feel you, girl.

Jane Goodall was cool as hell. I was obsessed with watching documentaries about her work and thought she was rad as fuck for wanting to chill with primates

I slammed a Choco Pie right after I was done working out

“... we’ll have dinner together at a local restaurant and we’ll be able to walk. We don’t have to go by an armored plated vehicle.” Trump went to dinner earlier this month a few blocks from the White House to show it was safe even for him to venture out. He rode over in his armored limousine

If you were ever wondering what being 5'1" at a concert was like, it's like this

There is no way iTunes Visualizer was ever as good as Milk Drop

You guys, I keep hard candies in my bag.

I'm really shocked that in my mid-forties I can go to a metal show and headbang all night, get up at 10:30am, drive two hours with traffic back home, work out, unload the dishwasher, and then take an everything shower.

It's 7:30am and my office mate is clipping their nails. Someone kill me.

I'll never forgive the right for making me defend Jimmy Kimmel

What is this drink starving? *confusingly looks around* Thirsty.

"This is so nice!" They said while sipping coffee, breeze blowing on their face, Lexapro pumping through their veins, indica kickin' in, looking across the island they live on, and gaze upon the oil refinery.

I'll never forget my Women's Studies professor taking attendance on 9/11

"I think it's worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment to protect our other God-given rights." Charlie Kirk, 2023