I am a crafty bitch

I love Steve and Nancy with all my heart. Do not let those dumb bitches end up together.

Billy is a scumbag but OOOH MY GOOOOOD is Dacre Montgomery a sexy sonuvabitch

Ok, but the thing is… Mike has always been the main character, hasn’t he.

Maybe the real Stranger Things were the friends we made along the way (I finished season 1 of my rewatch)

Curly girls who style their hair when they’re out of the shower are stronger than me bc wdym you REWET YOUR HAIR, standing around in a DAMP T-SHIRT OR ROBE, getting HAIR GEL AND LOOSE HAIR ALL OVER EVERYTHING I would throw a fit bro

HEY, HOLLY, SO, UH, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN TALKING TO VECNA, EXACTLY

I know she was just trying to be a good friend but goddammit Barb you should’ve just gone home!!!!!

Honestly, I kinda miss landlines. Bring that shit back. Realistically, the only thing I really want to use my phone for is texting, taking pics, and getting directions.

Rewatching Stranger Things and in the very first fucking episode where Will disappears they’re playing a campaign and he made an attack roll on the demogorgon and he had to roll a 13 or higher but he rolled and 7 and he told Mike “the demogorgon got me” AND THEN THE DEMOGORGON GOT HIM FOR REAL 😭

People whose favorite anime are Attack on Titan and Evangelion… we are not the same.

THREE TIMES!!! IN LESS THAN 12 HOURS!!! I QUIT!!!

HE’S IGNORING ME AGAIN

SECOND SAYS “I WAS JUST A GHOST FROM THE START” AS IF THAT’S SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER ABOUT HIM BEING GONE

DYING IS A DAY WORTH LIVING FOR

@patmdickerson.bsky.social has ignored all 12 of my texts I have been texting him since 10

The Pirates of the Caribbean really is a perfect trilogy.

SICK OF ALL THESE WEBSITES ASKING ME TO SIGN IN WITH A PASSKEY OR A CODE LIKE LET ME JUST USE THE STUPID PASSWORD YOU MADE ME SET THIS ACCOUNT UP WITH IN THE FIRST PLACE STOP EMAILING ME RANDOM NUMBERS WITH EXPIRATION TIMES

The only way I will ever find a perfect partner is if Alex trains them first because look at this. Now when I text her my every thought today I will know she is not ignoring me and does not hate me!

If I’m ever told I have to start commuting again would it be absolutely insane if I was like “can I bring my dog?”

AIN’T NO FUCKING SHOT I SAID THIS (I’m crashing out about the time I was on the Tyra Banks Show no I will not be elaborating)

People who don’t put effort into making their dating profiles… why are you even here.

Not my mom asking me how much debt I’m in. Girl. Unless you plan on paying it. That number is strictly on a need to know basis. And you simply do not need to know!

kate refuses to admit that an elton john song would be considered "oldies" music my sweet brethren the song you are referencing is from 1972.

If no one got me I know Benson got me (just a girl and her Emotional Support English Teacher)

*taps microphone* yes, hello, mr. mayor mamdani, may i please request one (1) rent-controlled astoria apartment, thank you 🫶🏼

I FEEL ALIVE

THE KING OF NEW YORK IS A 34-YEAR-OLD INDIAN AMERICAN MUSLIM MAN FROM QUEENS

GET ABSOLUTELY FUCKED, CUOMO

Breaking News: Zohran Mamdani, a 34-year-old state lawmaker from Queens, will be the 111th mayor of New York. He will be the first Muslim to ever lead the city, as well as its first South Asian mayor and the youngest mayor in more than a century. nyti.ms/47O4mT0

We did it, Zo!!!! 🥳

Thinking about the bottom of the barrel absolutely not urgent things my friends have pinged all in the Discord for yet nobody told me Dick Cheney died. I found out from a meme.

It’s always when I know I have to wake up earlier than usual that my brain decides it’s not sleepy.

My two biggest gripes with Stardew Valley are 1. The controls and 2. All the text is so fuckin’ small I can’t fuckin’ read ANYTHING

Extremely hilarious to me that my first instinct always is to be an asshole and yet I persevere and… don’t do that.

OP SHIP WILL OVERCOME ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING INCLUDING AMNESIA

Every other sentence out of my mouth is “toof hurt”

MOUF HURT KEEPING ME AWAKE

MOUF UNCOMFY

I’VE JUST SEEN A FACE I CAN’T FORGET THE TIME OR PLACE WHERE WE JUST MET SHE’S JUST THE GIRL FOR ME AND I WANT ALL THE WORLD TO SEE WE’VE MET MM-MM-MM-M’MM-MM

My Collections™️ are going to be getting a serious overhaul over the next few weeks ahhh I have so much to DO

I finally got my temporary tooth out to clean it but now… I have to get it back in… nnnnnnnnnnn

Very much not living la vida loca rn

Save me ginger ale… ginger ale save me…

The concept of having a second job really only appeals at 430 in the morning ig (or maybe it doesn’t appeal rn bc I feel like I’m dying (I didn’t eat enough food before taking my meds and now I’m nauseous) and it’s harder to call out from a part-time service job than my full-time desk one)

Woke up at 430, started thinking too hard about applying for a second job, now I can’t fall back to sleep, rip

Took me multiple days to realize I straight up (accidentally) threw out one of my credit cards (I used it to pay for my meds in the pharmacy drive thru and the pharmacist put it in the bag (and told me she did) except I forgot and so I threw out the bag… and my card.) anyway I ordered a replacement.

Check out our PW Best Books 2025 for your next favorite read! buff.ly/segXqqf

You never realize how many different parts of your mouth factor into a single action like spitting or gargling until you’ve got stitches in unorthodox places

Not me being like “I’m so eepy” while literally laying in bed. GO TO SLEEP THEN