Is the triple 0 emergency service offline because the lines are jammed with woke right politicians test calling the service? #auspol

According to this chart, precisely zero people who were too young to vote in 2016 have died. Must be a paradise for genZ in the post Brexit UK.

Forced to sit through #Insiders on the ABC today. Really past due to rename this to "The Footy Show". Zero discussion about anything substantive. Just tactics, polls, personalities and predictions. If they added live crosses to Mahatma Coat the transformation would be complete. #auspol

I just don't understand why so many Aussies are getting so sentimental about Colbert. Seems like a decent enough guy, but to me it just shows how captured by the USA our culture has become. Nauseating.

I am not "Anxious" you condescending fuck. I am livid. #AI

X has been fighting this in court for what, about 3 years? 2 hours is about how long it takes for X to generate the revenue to pay the piss weak fine. Just block that shitty site FFS.

When I was an ADFA cadet in the 80s, the 3rd years routinely bullied and bastardised the shit out of the 1st years. The 2nd years were split. Half wanted it to stop immediately, the other half, only after they got their turn the following year. Pretty much sums up tax debate right now #auspol

If Delta Goodrem sings a cover of "Two Strong Hearts" in the GF, I'll tune in. Otherwise it remains a hard NO from me. #eurovision

Trump tells the truth for the first time : "I didn’t even finish reading it."

Farrer electorate result is a big yawn. 2PP Conservative vote 57% this time. 56% for Ley last year. The ELEVEN elections over 40+ years prior it was between 65% and 73%. #auspol

If the Liberals were a business, they would be Myers. For decades, steadily sacrificing product quality, service and brand loyalty to compete on lowest prices, until one day they wake up and find all their new customers have pissed off to The Reject Shop. #auspol

This article is such a disappointing misfire. The real story gets killed by the headline-inducing clickbait rage about what constitutes 'income support'. The focus shouldn't be about where the money comes from. It *IS* worth examining deteriorating physical/mental health in work age people. #auspol

A lot of people losing their minds because Bezo 'bought' his way into The Met Gala with $10 million bucks, instead of just buying a few $100,000 tickets like regular people do.

All that product trapped in the cloakroom is gonna spike the price of cocaine for sure.

So hear me out, we need to speed up the #AUKUS subs, so we can fill their ballast tanks with diesel and sneak them through Hormuz undetected. Problem solved.

Damn right they should. And so should the rest of us.

It is tough being a regular human. I imagine being Carrie level omnipotent, and setting a random billionaire on fire each day. It does make me feel slightly better for a few delusional moments.

"Grace immediately catches Albo in his blind spot, with a brutal 'Dorothy Dixer' to the left kidney. Difficult stuff to watch.." #auspol

The National Press Club needs to explain why they think it's appropriate to invite the Israeli ambassador to speak - a man representing a country that has murdered 300 journalists since it started is genocide in Gaza. Hillel Newman should be expelled, not honoured by the media.

When it takes that long to spit out a thankyou to your wife, it looks like you have forgotten her name #sapol

Bullshitting lobbyists warn of dire consequences if we stop letting them rob us. You know, unprecedented stuff like "price rises" and "shortages".. Happy to pay more if it goes in our own damn bank account #auspol

#Raiders #Brumbies can buy their own damn stadium. The Canberra biz I worked at for 30 years employed more local people, built product for export and use by most Canberra public servants every day. Nobody bought us an office, and we didn't have billions in gambling $$ to buy our own shit.

Trump shat the bed, and is now having a big sook when nobody else wants to help him and Bibi lick the sheets clean.

If Albo was to announce he has accepted a request from Queen Mary of Denmark to send our Navy to patrol and protect the fjords around Greenland, he will be PM for decades. #auspol

"RONALD REAGAN WAS VERY SUPPORTIVE, WE SPOKE FOR 45 MINS..." 🤣🤣🤣 #iran #trump

"Hi Don, sending our military immediately, as per your request. We'll be sure to keep them well back from the front lines, consistent with your opinion of our help last time.. 10,000 fucking kilometres back, to be precise. Best regards to Vlad, hope that rash you gave him is clearing up." #iran

So while USA F35s are bombing the shit out of things, an RAAF one is doing loop the loops in Canberra for shit and giggles at a fireworks show. Ghoulish stuff.

I suggest "From The Tailings Dam To The Reef" would offer QLD protestors a legal loophole AND a multitasking opportunity. #qldpol #auspol

Can always count on The Nats to replace a lunatic with a bigger one. #auspol

I like to think that while all us long time despisers of #vilekyle are delighting in his demise, the real payoff is knowing that most of his listeners will turn on him like arsehole seagulls on a soggy chip, because that's the type of fanbase he has created for himself.

The Jewish Council of Australia condemns Benjamin Harnwell's appalling comment at the Advance conference and call on our leaders and the Antisemitism Envoy to speak out in condemnation.

The Valentines Day adverts in my feed are trying to get me murdered.

Tassie is now even more awful than it used to be. Never go there. #Kudelka

Biden: "We are not a nation that guns down our citizens in the street." Yes you are.

Just wondering if Trump's supposed immunity from prosecution extends to summary executions of US citizens in the street by his secret police goon squads? What sort of rancid country is this?

Sinner manages to scrape a win after they close the roof and he fortunately doesn't die. Now he is in the commercial break advertising SUNSCREEN. He is just taking the piss now. #ausopen

I wasn’t much of a Tesla fan before, but our new house came with two Tesla products pre-installed. Both of these are kinda fucked due to intentional decisions made by Tesla to screw over customers. The EV charger will only charge Tesla EVs and the Powerwall essentially cannot ever be upgraded.

Hey Carse! Back the fuck off, fella. I don't care if umpire turned down a clean bowled. Stokes as captain can have a robust chat with the umpire, but if he has to physically put himself between the umpire and you, then you are being a bit of a cunt. #TheAshes

Fucking pisses me of that Australia keeps platforming a bunch of overseas artists of questionable current appeal instead of current or up and coming Australian artists for any nationally televised event. Anyway, HNY to everyone except the showrunners on Aus TV.

@theguardian.com is reporting that, yet again, Kiribati is the first country to welcome the new year. This enlightening scoop is why I keep donating to them year in, year out. I admire their commitment to truth, accuracy, and being first with the big issues.

My hope for 2026 is that a human learns how to convince an AI chatbot to kill itself

Post any fake AI slop, and you get a block. Repost someone else's, you get an unfollow. Simple stuff really. Dont be gross.

Looks like the big winner in this year's #ashes series is going to OzHarvest who are currently leading the series 4-0 against SportsBet.

So Tim Wilson proudly wants to lead a party with the election slogan : "Most of us are not homophobic cunts!" Righto. #auspol

I'm melting... I'M MELTING...... aaaaaahhhhhhh!!

If this turns out to be my last post, it is because I'm not going through and age verification process. Plenty of other useful things I can be doing instead of this anyway.

Govt response is they won't be "intimidated" by legal action. Oh, fuck off! Legal action isn't intimidation. It's a petition for restitution by the independant judicial authority. "Intimidation" is the thing you cave in to EVERY TIME when Murdoch and 2GB say mean things. #auspol

Hey Everyone! It seems every single person, friend, foe and vague internet connection or commercial interaction is resulting in a black friday interaction. I just need to say, with love and affection, please fuck the hell off.

Breaking News: The Liberal Party adopts ambitious new policy position of "Net Zero Members of The House of Reps by 2050" #auspol

ABC Radio Canberra Breakfast had Tony Abbott appearing today for a saccharine chat with Ross Solly to flog his shit new book. Couldn't get him anywhere NEAR the ABC when it mattered. Fuck off back to 2GB, or pehaps Alan Jones has a podcast, if he wants to get the word out. #auspol