The Revenant (And Moulin Rouge)

This makes me wildly happy

School just canceled for tomorrow. Olympic sized cheering for Tuesday! Remember when I thought the automated caller’s voice was female and a female colleague was convinced her automated call came from a man? It was weird and borderline set-uppy

I assume the whole world wanted Canada to win, excerpt for our own Legion of Doom. (Sports and politics!!)

I just found out this is the same actress.

The petition for a season 2 of PONIES has already been made, so at least we have that

Someone: That’s quite the dark patch you got over you, Paul… Paul: Story of my life

When you saw only one set of footprints, that was because I left.

Cancel school for a week!!!

While the ladies on PONIES haven’t quite gone into disguise mode yet, I fondly recall sharing Jennifer Garner disguises on ALIAS vs Keri Russell disguises on THE AMERICANS, generally speaking.

Plate of cheese, Eloise?

Dear snow gods, Please grant me snow days Monday and Tuesday. Humbly and imploringly, Paul (the Paul who is beleaguered)

The Gen X urge to stand in the place where you live.

If I know my Razzies, Melania will win Worst Actress next year, yes, for a documentary.

Speaking of Olympic figure skating, remember when my mom had to stage an intervention for me because I became addicted to Hard Copy's coverage of Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding in 1994?

If you’re not watching All Creatures Great and Small, I hope you’re ok with your choices.

Oh, here’s a dollop of joy

My frequent lament (What the holy hellfire?) is not feeling entirely hyperbolic anymore. Rats.

Do I like the tv show Ponies more than actual ponies? Maybe!

Going to a Song Song Blue party and I said I was gonna bring Forever in Blue Cheese Potatoes, but I couldn’t get to the store!! So instead I am making Girl, You’ll be a Macaroni Soon? It will work.

Paul, you fuddy duddy

Reminder: The Off-Broadway musical comedy The Silence is the most amazing piece of theatre ever ever. (Just Google the playlist)

Mrs Parker and the Vicious Circle Jerk?

You Can Never Count on Me!!

Pulp Free Fiction

I’d rather talk about bugs to you than talk about nothing to nobody…. My dumb life… grocery stores and laundromats… (Jesus Christ, Tracy Letts)

Off to see Carrie Coon and

As always on VDay, remember Parkland and the wildly inspiring teen survivor activists. #MarchForOurLives

Ariel: You want thingamabobs? I got twenty!! Flounder: Jeez. Brag much, you ungrateful whore?

The au pair of bad news

Sorry, bawling, Rudy somehow came on.

Science teacher to IT guy: I know what a pixel is. (That guffaw was me, everyone!)

Special shout out to the French teacher at my school who, upon learning the agenda of the two hour end of day meeting, perfectly reenacted

My CV update: Not in the Epstein files!!

I call it Swoon Cheesecake If anyone prays to the cheesecake gods, I’d kinda like no cracks!

Are there senior Olympics? Bc that could be interesting and sad for me.

How bout we agree to disagree, Alanis!?!

Kid wakes up in class and cuts to the chase: So Othello is just a shit husband.

Pam Bondi seems really fun.

Happy Valentines Day to me

A loss, in all sincerity

I can't believe how boring and stationary my day is. www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZom...

Say it to my face, Alias Grace!

Clueless

What if I joined a gay men’s chorus but had to promptly quit when I learned no one at all was interested in workshopping the 1970s Oompa Loompa medley? (Like sad, right.)

Maybe for the remainder of the fortnight I will insist on being called Paolo Cortina?

There is a moment in Notes on a Scandal when Judi Dench narrates, “Ah, bliss!” Ipso facto, I just sat down to a glass of wine.

It’s kind of interesting to wake up, check your phone and think, “Oh, no one wanted to cancel school today… that’s pretty rude.”