Restocked my fridge

Fasting time let's goooo

Meds took my ability to jack off but Itll never stop me from drawing cute girls kissing

I self sabotaged my progress and gained the inch back🧍

I'm such a fat chud argghh

Felt so nauseous today after throwing up

My weight is terrible I'm close to morbid obesity but at least my fitness is improving and I can run now + muscle growth🧍I've just been maintaining the same range of weight for the past couple of years and it makes me want to claw my eyes out

At a party and I am so terrible at socializing that I'm stuck in a bedroom watching TV instead of socializing

Binge purging will fuck up my teeth but I can't help it

Logging the caveman way

My stomach is protruding and my face is bloated as hell and I weigh 2lbs more than previously did I really get fatter this fast? I feel heavy as fuck

I can't gain that weight back. I need to chill. I need to not binge

Breakfast

Got out the hospital and lost 5 lbs during the week I was there. Lifehack

I'm gonna eat myself to death and I'm gonna cut myself because it's not like it matters whether or not I "fix" myself ill always be unwanted

I can never win

Why was I born so fucking ugly and uncharismatic. Why does no one fucking love me even when I love them

Trying to write it out to fight off binge urges. This is torture 😵‍💫

OMAD. Very hearty but it was tasty and made me feel better about being unloved

I need to regain control again

I hate my eating hsbits

Getting food cravings while alone in the house with no one to talk to is scary

I need to lock in so I can be as beautiful as my queen

Idk how to take good pictures but this was so good I'm so proud

This is one of the best protein bars I've tasted

Successfully fasted for 24hrs. I feel great and the meal I broke it with was SOO GOOD. God it's great to be back in controm

Banana

Omad. Ground turkey, mash potatoes, greenbeans, and pickled onions. It was very scrumptious

My world is stagnant. I don't know what to do or what to feel but at least it's making me lose my appetite.

My muscles are so SORE GRAGGHHHH

I don't think it matters whether or not I'm fully clean. It doesn't matter anymore. I am alone

I also tried exercising today but it literally felt like my heart was about to jump out my chest. I've been so dehydrated

I want to rip my insides out. I wanna throw them all uo. I want to remove the need to consume

I'm gonn die I hink I see God holy shit this feels awful

Actually feels like something is tearing open my insides holy shot I shouldn't have done that

Binged om spicy food I'm so so fucked my stomach is fucked

I'm gonna die alone

I tried to exercise but I feel so bloated and fat. I regret eating breakfast

Almost binged last night but it was delayed and eventually uber cancelled and refunded it. It was a sign from god

Why does just existing hurt so much

I feel so alone

Work outs been good I've been good and I've been getting stronger but I stopped being able to SHIT😭

I feel so guilty and sad and useless and like I'll never be able to live s normal life or care about anything ever I am a shell

Was doing so good this week with staying in a deficit but I binged. It was all I could think about and now my stomach hurts a lot

This is what I've got logged

Today was such a good food day. I meal prepped spaghetti w/ beef and chicken for the week and they both came out so good and filling I didn't even have the urge to binge. Maybe heavy lifting has been improving my mood ☺️

I wonder if the food service workers know that all that food is gonna be inside of me within in hour

Vomited and my upper abdomen feels so fucked

They weren't that great but I ended up binging on left over foods and I feel like throwing up

Urge to binge so strong I'm making my own cupcakes. (Not following a recipe I'm just guesstimating measurements and maybe they'll come out so bad it'll stop my binge)