It's only when a tradie comes around and I try to offer them tea or coffee (because I'm not a monster) that I realize we don't have normal tea or normal coffee because we don't really drink them at home. Currently contemplating offering the electrician sleepy tea.

Eating lunch outside and having to fight the wind to keep the broccoli on my fork until it reaches my mouth. It is still better than taking a break inside, there's people in there.

The dominance of wide legs in the dress pants arena is making me insane. I live in Wellington. I have to be able to tuck my pants into my boots, otherwise the wind blows up my pant legs and makes it feel like im not wearing pants at all. There's a tornado in my pants and it is too happy to see me.

Working on my mihimihi got me realizing what I actually need to be working on is all that baggage I got about being related to my ancestors.

Had two drinks at the work function and now I can't stop telling everyone about Kākāpō cam.

Living in late stage capitalism has me jealous of the hypothetical animal chewing off a limb to escape a trap. You're telling me there is an actual way out and the price is only chewing off one limb? I fucking wish that was an option to escape this fucking timeline.

Really hope they find something actionable in my ankle ultrasound, otherwise I will have been walking around all day with lube in my socks for nothing.

I don't usually eat shortbread, but uh, this particular shortbread, is um, making some compelling arguments.

As I am going through the process of recovering from an injury that is covered by ACC I am calling bullshit on the idea that we have appropriate accident compensation that means we don't have to sue when we get hurt. 8 months of physiotherapy at $40 a week, I would actually like to sue some bitches.

Lessons from my mid thirties: I do have a bunch of awesome friends but, as they are largely my age and older, I can't ask them to help me move the dead washing machine down the three stairs in the garage. I care too much for their spines.

I have got to stop looking at things at work and thinking "well that doesn't expire until 2026, we have heaps of time"... we do not in fact have heaps of time until 2026.

When that friend we always knew was gong to make it actually does make it, we get glammed the fuck up.

Felling kinda done with interesting times, could really do with some boring times please.

Lessons from my mid-thirties: give up on looking cute for a gig and focus entirely on sunburn prevention. You will still look cute.

Going to a festival today but I'm 34 so the only drug interactions I'm googling are diclofenac and paracetamol.

Hairdresser: so who are you looking forward to seeing at laneway? Me: Chappell Roan, Lucy Dacus, Gigi Perez, Wet Leg. It's going to be a very lesbian heavy lineup. Hairdresser: that's really what New Zealand needs at this time. Me: you know, you are so right.

Need to get me one of those tear-away shirts for laneway just in case Chappelle Roan ever looks at me.

I need some kind of combination physiotherapist/psychologist, it turns out the lack of confidence with which I move through the world is genuinely damaging my body.

Back at work after three weeks off and I am Gandalf in the Mines of Moria the way I have no memory of this place.

12 month update on this: it doesn't work to only check the parts of the shower that previously had gecko, because gecko can come up with a new plan of hiding at the top of the shower curtain so gecko can fall from a height onto tits resulting in screaming, crying, screaming, naked running.

Getting a lot of ads for Christianity in the Heated Rivalry tag on tumblr, like even the gay app is like y'all need Jesus.

Day to myself and I could go and see any of the presumably exciting art around the Wellington region, but what I am doing is going back to the same Jason Greig show at The Dowse that I have already seen because it is so fucking good I am thinking about planning a heist.

Lessons from my mid thirties: it is possible to stay completely sober on news years eve and still feel hungover on January 1st, staying out until 12:30am just does that now.

At midnight I kissed a beautiful dog on top of her beautiful head and now I am going to eat a bagel. Absolutely crushing 2026 so far.

News from the physiotherapist: when she says "have you tired butt stuff?" she means "have you tried excercises for these particular butt muscles as part of rehabbing your injury?" and not uh "have you tried butt stuff?"

Ran out of glad wrap for the leftovers so the red wine jus has gone into the fridge in a snaplock bag.

Feeling weirdly resistant to throwing away the piece of broken glass I just dug out of my foot, like I worked so hard for that you know?

Throwback Thursday: baby Paige and Alex, half our lives ago. We had no idea how this was going to go. I'm so glad we survived it together.

Our Christmas lunch for two has three packets of cheese, 1.5 cheeses per capita. I love being a grown up who is in charge of my own day.

Shout-out to all my friends for whom this day is not pleasant.

Laying on the the table at the physiotherapist with my legs fulk of acupuncture needles googling whether acupuncture is pseudoscience.

Last day at work for the year, call me Jean Valjean the way Freedom is mine. The Earth is still. I feel the wind. I breathe again. And the sky clears. The world is waking.

I just want it on the record, lest I am witnessed in Wellington city center this evening, I am not showing up for fucking James fucking Cameron, I'm gunna go see some drag, it just happens to be nearby. These titties get festive for queers not millionaires.

Go add Also, it's Christmas by Matt Rogers to all your Christmas playlists. You won't regret it*. *your mileage may vary.

Measuring how hot it is inside by how much it looks like the cat is trying to fake her own death.... it's fucking warm.

Just wanted to share this motivational cross stitch I finished, let's kick some ass today folks!

Learning to drive milestone achieved: got yelled at by some random man like I was doing something wrong when he was absolutely the one doing things wrong.

Paige is home, but more importantly Paige bought a bow tie for the cat.

Breaking news: you can just wear a cape to your normal-ass office job and everyone will be jealous of you.

Man, I did so well not spending all my money this week, I deserve a treat. *immediately spends all of my money on treats*

"When I am driving I hate sharing the road with cyclists" "Oh so we should create separate cycle lanes to minimize interactions between cars and bikes" "How dare you suggest there be a bit of road that's not for me" It's like they don't want cyclists out of their way, they want them to not exist

Finally got around to framing these cross stitches I finished months ago. I think we will hang them above Paige's desk so all their work is super queer and trans.

Logically I understand that the Rocky Horror Show references Frankenstein but that didn't stop me watching Frankenstein (2025) like "wow getting a lot of Rocky Horror vibes from this"

Found a single loose panadol in the cat's toy basket so I guess we are going to have to have a conversation about drug safety.

Turns out there's only so many crafting blogs you can follow in one go before you start getting better help ads.

Getting my period on November 1st in a house full of left over Halloween candy was a brilliant idea. Great work uterus.

I see you Fake Halloween earrings lovers. All these folks complementing my Halloween earrings on the 31st of October but they were silent when I wore Halloween earrings All Month Long. Imagine only loving skeleton earrings one day a year, couldn't be me.

Me: my bus comes in 6 minutes, is it possible to get all my meds in that time? Pharmacist: oh I am so sorry our computer is down right now, we can't do that. Me: okay, do you want to look at pictures of my cat for six minutes? Pharmacist: absolutely.

Learning I'm one of those people who can smell when sweat was made in terror by accidentally getting a waft of myself after driving lesson.

I was worried we were outing ourselves to the whole neighborhood with our commitment to Halloween decorations while never acknowledging Christmas, but the other day I said "Halloween is gay Christmas" to a straight person and they were completely baffled so I reckon we are in the clear.