For the first time ever, consumer confidence has reached "12yo boy with acne and a speech impediment" levels.

Dear Mr. Trump, I am not now - nor have I ever been - a member of Antifa.... BECAUSE THAT IS NOT A REAL THING

Remember Everyone Voting On Letting Unwell Tyrants Into Office? No?

I've waited 4 decades for a chance to fit this reference in organically...

Just pitched an 80yo stranger the idea of writing a feature biopic together, based on a play he wrote 26 years ago. Have I lost my mind? Possibly. Or maybe, just maybe, we'll be a match made in heaven, and he'll actually live long enough to see our film get made.

As problematic as it may be, this video is exactly how I would describe having bipolar disorder.

Four of the seven photos I shot in NYC...

My nephew Robbie's memorial today in Elmont, NY.

God bless @amtrak.com for waiting for me, for providing a roomette, for the free food and drink, and for the wonderful service by Kayla on the Crescent today. Truly the best way to travel!

Just got tix to Crooked Con 2026. I have no idea what the day will consist of or what the purpose of it is... But I gotta do something with myself, you know?

Two decades ago, I put a photo of a sunset on RedBubble and called it "Coachella Sun." It was doing well, until the festival had it pulled down. Never mind that I shot it in the motherfucking town of Coachella.

I'm trying to get my nephew to become a motivational writer and speaker. If you believe you can manifest stuff, please think on this one. Help make it happen for him!

My 37yo nephew, truly a brother to me, died in a motorcycle accident last month. This was his memorial today in Winchester, Virginia. Hold your loved ones tight.

This is awesome... Just a gigantic jet fuel spill in our local waterways - AND 2 dam breaks - in the last 3 months, which our government tried to HIDE FROM THE PUBLIC.

@kalshiofficial.bsky.social had a prediction market: "How many gold cards will Trump issue before May?" According to all sources, the answer is 1. My prediction was 1 to 5. Payout: $882. So I won, right? Not according to Kalshi...

Wish I could hear the adorably benign phrase, "Goodness gracious!" without next thinking the less cute: "Ass is bodacious..."

The boy who cried assassination attempt.

Finally started hanging my art collection, after living in my house for almost 4 years. It feels so good to see these pieces that I love so much again... The work of creatives will always make me happy.

I've often wondered if I'd ever have a reason to return to the island where I spent so much time growing up... Thank you to my mentors @roadmapwriters.com for planning a 2027 retreat and giving me the perfect excuse to go back there!! I can't wait to see Joey and Dorian et al next May in BARBADOS!!!

This was the last IG msg I got from my 37yo nephew Robbie (in response to me sending him photos I had shot on assignment), before he was killed in a motorcycle crash last weekend. Crushing. 💔

The first known permanent photograph was taken by Joseph Nicéphore Niépce at his residence, known then as Le Gras, in Saint-Loup-de-Varennes, France. In 1826, Niépce captured the image titled "View from the Window at Le Gras" using a process he developed called heliography...

For people (like me) with epilepsy, the "aura" before each seizure stays the same, but it's different for each of us. Here's mine, every time: 1. Major dèjá vu, like I know everything that's about to happen, then it does...

Who doesn't love a TACO Tuesday??

Hey, y'all remember Cuba and its people? Good times...

But will it really be any better when he dies and Adolf Hickler becomes President?

It's not easy being the Easter Bunny, but somebody's gotta do it.

If any facial expression could convey, "Go ahead, big boy... Lay your dick on my tongue and prepare for the worst BJ of your life," this is it.

She's gorgeous. She's wicked smart. She's magical to be around. Oh and btw, this is how my niece sings:

If you're Gen Z, and you really want to know what life was like in the 1990s, please watch these 6 films: 1. Reality Bites 2. Singles 3. Clerks 4. Party Girl 5. Empire Records 6. Can't Hardly Wait

Kaydence Carpenter instigated with racist speech at her car. Kaydence Carpenter was afraid of strangers standing around because she is racist. Kaydence Carpenter tried to kill a whole group of people because she is too racist to care that they are human. Kaydence Carpenter needs to be in prison.

Found the PERFECT family to buy my Baltimore house! They're obsessed with the place, just like I am. I'm taking a hit on the $$$ (no surprise with the price of everything skyrocketing), but it's worth it to me to know that the 1923 home will be loved and preserved, rather than gutted and flipped...

Just shot these at Laurel Park racetrack and a private farm in Harwood, Maryland - for a profile of my oldest friend (and big-time nonprofit executive turned thoroughbred exercise rider) Courtenay Brown - for The Chronicle of the Horse.

Eat it, Leo & Timée!!

Me, to literally all my friends and family, almost all the time...

Putting a half billion dollars into rebuilding Pimlico Racetrack is the worst misuse of money happening right now in Baltimore. Laurel Park just canceled racing this Saturday bc they (regularly) can't get enough entries... (1/2)

First Noam Chomsky is in the files. Then Kristi Noem gets canned. If I were this guy, I'd watch my back.

You have to be 21 to bet on FanDuel, but MINORS are allowed to bet on when we bomb foreign countries and pass laws against trans people. Wtf is wrong with our society?!?

@nbcnews.com Jose-Diaz Balart's reporting on Cuba is the most one-sided, insanely subjective view on the events imaginable. He speaks with a cold hatred, from an utterly unsympathetic POV. We might as well take what Trump says about Cuba as scripture, while we are DESTROYING a beautiful country.

An open letter to Jeremy Piven: Sir, I was at your show at the Arlington Drafthouse last night. (I was the chubby redhead who had you sign PCU stuff.) Almost never one to fan out, I have absolutely adored your acting since 1986. So, with all due respect, I have to ask: WTF ARE YOU THINKING?

I was lamenting that Israeli NBA player Deni Avdija ever left the Washington Wizards, because his nickname there (The Wizraeli) was great. My buddy instantly responded that it's no big deal, because now he can just go by The Denocide. 🏀

Everybody knows that talcum baby powder causes ovarian cancer. But nobody talks about the decades when that same powder was used to cut cocaine... How many people have died from cancers caused by inhaling that asbestos-laced poison? Asking for... many friends.

America's Greatest Generation was all, "We will die for Jewish people's freedom... but they sure as shit can't join our country clubs."

This morning, Buddhist Monks - who traveled 2300 miles from Ft Worth to Washington, D.C. on their Walk for Peace - finished their journey in my hometown of Annapolis... (1/2)

INTERMITTENT SCROLLING FASTING: For the next week, I'll only be looking at social media/news 8-10 nightly. Will respond to all msgs on socials then. Want to reach me, please text. Want to catch up, let's FaceTime/Zoom. I have to get back to living my own life, instead of those of total strangers.

20 yrs ago, James Van Der Beek & I hung out at a very slow car wash on Sunset for an hr & we just chatted the time away. He was so sweet and funny. He was single & I wanted to ask him out, but I was chicken. I grieve for James, his friends & family & all my fellow Xennials who grew up alongside him.

The world MUST hear about Justin Arnwine... Well-known in the East Coast poker world as one of the winningest tournament players in years. Just 2 months ago, he won over $80K topping a tourney. His schtick... (1/2)

Even Dr. Moreau would argue that Epstein's clients should be in prison, and he made half-human beast monsters on his island.

It took me a long time, but I finally figured out that "Trump Derangement Syndrome" is just racist people's way of saying you're crazy for not being racist.