These personalised #Spotify playlists are getting a bit much. Do I have to start closing the curtains?

When she realised Edward’s withered right leg was making further perambulations difficult, Emily offered to initiate full hover mode (even it risked a backdraft and gravel in the gusset). #GirlsOwnCC

My wordle choices today. Coincidentally, also my morning routine.

“No response. I’ll increase the frequency.”

“I’ll lower mine if you lower yours.”

All Good Thongs #GrokDoesStarTrekEpisodes

Please spare a prayer (or even better, money or volunteering time) for the work of London (and other) homeless charities this season: BBC News - George joins Prince William in preparing meal for homeless www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

First image from next year’s Doctor Who Christmas Special just dropped. If the Disney deal was still going there’d be at least 10 of ‘em and they’d be Judoon.

If you see this, quote with your model of positive masculinity.

Oh, Tennantbaum #AllIWantforChristmasIsWho

“… and you say I shouldn’t worry my pretty little head about this Horizon software you’ve loaded on my laptop?”

When, as part of my cloning experiments, I extracted DNA from a fragment of cloth stained with the blood of Dixon of Dock Green actor, Jack Warner, I never expected six uniform police officers to turn up at my door.

When I wrote my article about male strippers and full frontal nudity in theatres, I never expected six out of uniform police officers to turn up at my door.

“Oh… you’re so big!” “Why, thank you darling.” “I was talking to the whale…”

Enjoy the Sunday caption contest. Give away ❤️s, retweet to encourage more competitors, include #GirlsOwnCC

Dr Alex Comfort’s Joy of Sex was full of ‘em.

Peaky Blinders II: The Wrath of Kiln.

This reminds me of the time my ventriloquist neighbour had to dismantle his doll ahead of relocation to a new address. I saw the arms, legs and parts of the head leave the house, but I didn't see the lips move...

Gonna chew me some gum and read me some words from @quantick.bsky.social’s latest tome. #AndOtherStories

Using one photo already on your phone, what is the announcement tomorrow at 2?

@richardcoles.bsky.social have you departed the hell site formerly known as twitter? I’ve been slowly reducing my activity there but may bow out altogether as everyone I enjoy following seems to be moving here.

Never mind clamping down on cottaging in municipal spaces, what about all the weapons testing?

Slightly diminish a band: Living In A Cricket Box.

Take me down to the Paraglide City where the grass has several impact craters and the emergency services attend with alarming frequency.

Take me down to the Paradigm City where the grass is as green as you’d expect in most municipal spaces of this type.

“Yes, Jamie, it is a big Labubu.”

Got wordle in three a few days ago and inadvertently came up with a forgotten pop band from the 80s…

Because they entered his apse without permission?

Could cause some conversational confusion if any members get elected: “What’s your job?” “Your MP.” “No you’re not.” “Yes I am. I’m in Your Party.” “I don’t have parties. And I wouldn’t invite you if I did.” “Misunderstanding?” “I’m married and my surname is not Understanding!” Etc etc…

To be honest, I’m not sure I like the direction this Cannon reboot is going in.

“Before I depart, I must say, what a delightful purring noise.” “I know! It almost drowns out the sound of my cat. You’ll forgive me if I don’t stand up to see you out?” #GirlsOwnCC

Anyway, book launch. I may put money behind the bar. Or just my briefcase.

The Needle and The Damaged Bum.

Watching the Bellend - sorry - Legends slot at #Glastonbury2025. Do you think someone should tell Rod his fountain pen has exploded in his jacket?

Find out more about Learning Disability Week here: mencap.org.uk/learni...

It’s #LearningDisabilityWeek. We're celebrating the 1.5 million people in the UK with a learning disability & championing their right to be seen, heard & valued. 78% in #SharedLives have a learning disability, living full, connected lives.  #DoYouSeeMe #LDW2025 @mencap.bsky.social

Please help if you can. This is a domestic abuse association who could use some extra visibility/donations. paris.nuitdesrelais.org/teams/elles-...

Linda

“The night’s are colder now, maybe I should close the door…” A Winter’s Statement of The Bleedin’ Obvious, David Essex

“I’ve seen two high agency males go at it like you wouldn’t believe…”

Visits to @TelfordWrekin & @OxfordshireCC #SharedLives schemes left a big impression on Chief Social Worker Isabelle Trowler: “If you are an authority or a social worker or personal adviser who doesn’t know about Shared Lives, you are missing a trick.” #CareLeavers

Shared Lives carers Ouma, Drusilla and Sandra were invited to the King’s Royal Garden Party at Buckingham Palace. “The cakes were exquisite, and our carers looked fabulous!” Read more about the day: sharedlivesplus.org....  #SharedLives #RoyalGardenParty

“What do we want?” “A W on our left and right buttocks!” “And when we bend over?” “WoW!”

“I’ve just been shot multiple times and now I’m covered in kidney beans, lentils and split peas.” “Did you get a good look at the weapon?” “I think it was a pulse rifle.”

I've seen an identically named road but one laid on a parabolic incline in the depths of winter because, as we know, Revenge is a street best curved cold.

“I’ve just remembered that episode of Last of The Summer Wine where an escaped hamster climbs into a pair of tights, unbeknownst to their wearer.” “Nora Batty?” “Well, she was quite sore…”

“How long before they realise we’ve actually dismembered someone?l