I swear I’m bigger than the other David 😅

Might need to pull a Diane Lane and move to Tuscany…

Is this too much cleavage for the Vatican?

Best way to beat the sleep deprivation x jet lag combo

Beat the heat 😚

Why do I feel strangely obligated to tell the other gym regulars I see every morning but never talk to that I’m going on vacation for two weeks

I hate when restaurants ask you to confirm your reservation the day before. I already told you I’d be there; that is *definitionally* what a reservation is

Nothing better than a humid trail run to sweat out a late Saturday night

I see your shower beer and raise you: shower mimosa 🥂

Kesha is so real for this tbh

The MLB hates fun

The difference between a 7am and 9am flight is so huge. Having coffee and food at home before you go to the airport changes everything

Can @ckab.bsky.social and I interest you in craft beer and/or 10-15 niche 30 Rock quotes

Whipped myself up a little morning treat. Literally.

Spring weather calls for a paper plane ☀️✈️🥃

All this new gay music and yet Wynonna Judd still hasn’t released the new song she performed at Stagecoach two weeks ago

Not enough coffee in the world today

Happy May the 4th! Here’s my current master ranking of all the Star Wars films/TV. (I haven’t seen some of the animateds)

Swimming really is the best morning exercise. Why tf do I do anything else

Mark of a good weekend morning is how long you can go before putting on pants

Snickerdoodles might be one of the most underrated cookies in the game

First WFH day all week, beautiful spring weather after the rain, and a new Kacey album? TGIF indeed ☺️

I was so mad about the omission of Joni Mitchell before remembering she’s Canadian. Leaving James Taylor and Stevie Nicks off is still crazy work tho

The most unique thing about Jayson Tatum is that good basketball players are rarely as hot as he is and hot basketball players are rarely as good as he is

Everyone celebrate by smooching your two best friends

It’s crazy how little laundry you go through in a week when you’re not exercising

Hydrated, caffeinated, AND the sun shining? Call it Finally Content Friday 😌

Realizing this specific outfit is now extremely Shane Hollander-coded to me

Best way to honor Earth Day is to celebrate year-round 🌎

Survived. Stayed under 2:30. Working on rehydrating

Third Boston tomorrow. Healthiest training block of the three so hopefully that translates 🤞

I can’t remember the last time n*tflix came out with a good television show but Big Mistakes lowkey the best show of the year so far???

Trying to manifest a cozy WFH Friday after a hellishly busy week

The most recent episode of Hacks is very important for those of us whose sexual awakening was Jesse McCartney in the mid 2000s

Sweater and shorts weather >>>>

Now to play a weeklong game called “how hydrated is too hydrated”

As soon as you reach the age where sleeping in is the biggest luxury in the world, you also lose the ability to stay asleep past 8:30a 🫠

99% of cocktail recipes on Instagram reels are godawful but this was a good one ☺️

Fun Friday fact- I wear flamingo underwear on Fridays almost every week and have done so for the last 5+ years. Genuinely can’t remember why I came up with Flamingo Friday but I’m sticking to it 🦩

It’s April 7th… what is happening 😩

Unfortunately I must report that I am now invested in the lives of the two Heated Rivalry lookalike contest winners who made out

This shirt is lowkey one of my most prized possessions

Queering the local Irish pub by showing up at 6pm on a Friday, ordering a paper plane, and demanding to watch women’s basketball

Treat yourself to a buttered muffin on this Fruit Confection Friday ☺️

The April showers came a day early ☔️

Friday, Old Fashioneds, and March Madness. Great combo

Watched the new Harry Potter trailer just out of curiosity and, among many other failings, it’s a great reminder that absolutely no one can cook like John Williams

The entire day after a 15-mile morning workout is a battle between not wanting to move at all and knowing that not moving will make your legs feel terrible

Shoutout to the nice lady at the front desk at my gym who was the first person to wish me happy birthday today 🎂

I’m sorry but “balls as big as church bells” is one of the funniest things a basketball coach has ever said