Me: sorry I was speeding officer, “Shut Up and Drive” by Rihanna came on shuffle Him: you… you know that song is about sex right? Me (a virgin): … Him: ok, put your hands behind your back pal

#Angle #1391 1/4 🎉 www.angle.wtf

this the vibe today. don’t come anywhere near me if you’re not bringing this energy

Do you guys think dinosaurs kissed way back in the day? (like before they were extinct)

You DO NOT wanna be a #8 Club Sub Mike’s Way on Rosemary Parm bread when my hungry ass is around 🤤

If these monkeys had to throw down, who would win? I know who I’m picking 🙂‍↕️

This mf at the bar at Applebees ordered 2 different drinks and is just having a conversation with himself 😭 I wanna join in the convo lemme third wheel! You, yourself, and me let’s chit chat

My custom license plate “676767” finally came in but it’s not funny anymore and now I look like an IDIOT driving around :/

Costcodle #875 1/6 ✅ costcodle.com

Wordle 1,690 3/6 🟩⬛⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟨🟩⬛🟨 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

I am not delusional.

gamer plays an online video game and impresses chat

DISPATCH CHARACTERS TIERLIST #TierlistTuesday

THE BUBATHON 2 SHIRTS RANK THEM TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS

BUBATHON 2 STARTS TOMORROW Up to 48 HOURS of gaming, yapping, and fun sub goals! Day 1 will be featured on the Twitch homepage! twitch.tv/burn2r

INNAWEEK BUBATHON DEC 18 2BM EST BEEEEE THEREEEEE

48m09s

should.... should i be providing daily bunnies? @developers.google.com what is it that you want from me.

going offline for a while :/ don't really wanna talk about it.

I will NOT allow human-octopus marriage. Sorry, that's a line I am not willing to cross. Discuss.

1h39 minutes of my life i will never get back @enderdragon minecraft is hard i will be back to beat it and by it i mean minecraft

BUBATHON 2 DEC 18TH MARK YOUR CALENDARS BE THEEERRRREEE 🐶

this is the crayola 64 pack for grown ups

1 1,2 2 3,4 3 3,8 4 ODDS x 5 4,5,9 x 6 8,0 7 5,6 x 8 8,9 x 9 2,0 x 0 2,3

DO NOT LOOK AT MY INSIDES only look at my outsides :(

WE THE BEOPLE are taking back the em dash, the Oxford comma, and all punctuation. YOU CAN'T HAVE IT @microsoft.com

MENTAL EALTH MATTERS you matter ❤️‍🔥 take care of yourself and your brain!

cactus bitch

How many unread texts do you currently have? I'm sitting on 46 atm

stubby

I have a theory Every single dumpster will eventually smell the same. It doesn't matter what you put in there, all dumpsters eventually smell like "dumpster"

putting a fake cast on my arm so I don't get judged for using a fork at the Chinese restaurant

LET EM SQUEAK IN YOUR MOUTH

Ordering a sub at Jersey Mike's and they asked me "Cut or Un-Cut?" WTF? Is that not kind of a personal question? Just let me have my sandwich :(

He's kinda bouncin on it crazy style! My mouth is just a big hole

Attention all Mouth Breathers you better watch out when using a toilet plunger

1 trillion lions could defeat the sun. change my mind.

tummy time 1v1 i would win guaranteed nobody would beat me in tummy time

im taking it like a good boy

Somebody get me a diary because I'm a wimpy kid 🗣️

Pasta is really just Italian scrambled eggs. Change my mind.

What's your strategy when putting on deodorant? How do you stroke it?

tiermaker.com/create/chair... #TLT

This is my haiku titled " #Ad " Amazon Brime Sub Ten bit TTS Tuesday Join Bitchcord Best Briends

How many times per day do you think you lick your teeth?

What are school buses doing during the school day? Could they not go fill that bus up with Amazon packages and do a little deliver on the side? Put those school buses to work!

IT IS TIME burn2r boetry slam PART TWO docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1F...

this is what i would crave maybe if i were a woman and on my period not really sure, since i am not a woman, but i did my best to put myself in a woman's shoes

It's my RIGHT as an American citizen to take a biss on the side of the highway and you can't stop me