I put a brand new pair of tights from snag on this morning, fresh out of the box, and there was a wasp in them and it stung my thigh.

I can’t tell you how loudly I cheered when Alan touched a face

I had to deal with a dead pigeon in my garden this morning and that was better than watching Tom on Strictly

In memoriam...

Watching Strictly from my sick bed I suddenly realise where I know Chris Robeshaw from: ohchrissaviges “Coquettish Ghost” insta account 😂😂😂

I do not remember my teaching degree mentioning that I may very well spend my day on the Bridgewater canal on a double canoe with ten year olds having done a book fair in the morning before school and another after school. Where was the maths????

That’s it. My baby boy in uni. And now: the rest of my life including having to sell my lovely house 😢

I cannot stomach this ongoing pattern of women, especially working class women and WOC, facing consequences for corruption, and rich white men who have been born with only the best untarnished silver crockery rammed into every orifice prancing away scot-free.

Very late to the party (again) but I am very much enjoying #Hacks

Birthday cake. Smaller one is gluten free: it looks tiny but is coffee shop muffin sized

T2 has got his A levels and is in his first choice Uni 🎉🎉🎉

I’m having carpets laid on the stairs landing and two bedrooms tomorrow which has resulted in me having to try to clear all those places whilst not creating utter chaos which which I could not cope. It’s not easy

My absolute favourite thing about that match (and there were lots!) was a video my boy has just sent me of his gf at the moment the winning penalty went in.

Best. Cats. Ever.

And still I am in school. How?

I’m livid, disappointed and resigned by exH behaviour. It’s like Twitter circa 2013

I’ve reached the “not sleeping/on the verge of a cold/stress bonanza” stage of the academic year. Despite stellar exam results yesterday and actual progress in the end of year production the thirteen working days remaining are weighing heavily.

He has and I am eagerly awaiting my order!

I work in a tough old Trafford school but it was super sweet to come into my boys checking in on how I was after the news about Diogo Jota this morning

My baby is 18 tomorrow and I’ve just spent two hours prepping the house for his birthday party tonight. Bought a new frock, written a speech. It’s a moment. Two lovely young men to adulthood pretty. Time gone in a flash.

Thursday night rush hour tram. A man is eating a whole double packet of custard creams. Another with two vapes in his hand is using a laptop. What is this???

Moving my eldest and his gf into their proper “forever”* flat a week before youngest 18th is proper “slipping through my fingers”

Another year of KS2 SATS done ✅ should I not be retired by now????

Performative dad loud parenting also occurring

Unnecessarily annoyed that a place I never go to isn’t open the hours I want it to be. To be fair, I checked online. Online lied. Now I am drinking filthy Starbucks coffee waiting. To collect an order I’ll probably just send back. Sigh.

Eighteen months ago I moved the kitchen round to the disgust of T2 who said it didn’t make sense. As this morning I STILL opened the wring cupboard for a cup I’ve moved it back

Bizarre day, now topped off by the Ocado van pulling up, sending the “we’re here unpacking” notification and as I waited by the door, just pulling off at speed. There is no dinner in this house. I also don’t know how to deal with this. Or why??

Been for lunch and to watch Abigail’s Party at the theatre today. I’ve now decided to watch Conclave in honour of today.

I’m a very lapsed catholic but it never quite goes away and I liked the late Pope. Rome looks beautiful today

I have a todo list as long as my arm today that culminates in attending my sisters 50th birthday dinner. Obviously I had a terrible nights sleep until 6.10am and now need coffee before commencement…

Good Friday tradition requires hot cross buns, fish pie for dinner and an alcoholic beverage on the sofa with tv by 4pm. Tomorrow is little sisters 50th birthday dinner and then Easter dinner on Sunday with all kids. Back to work Tuesday #booooooooo

Every day this week I have had lunch and wine with really lovely gorgeous friends and finally I realise that THIS is how I should be living my life

My little sister is 50 today. She’s drinking champagne in bed in Cornwall. I just had a smear #yinyang

Just cleared out two big cupboards in the dining room as part of my prep to sell, and my god I thought I’d done a good job in lockdown but apparently not.

Yesterday I returned a perfectly good dress because it had a zip up the back. If I am on my own it’s impossible to do. Am I not flexible enough? I was imagining myself running out to an uber asking the driver to do it, or a randomer on the tram

Irritating bolshie dad turns up an hour late to parents night having not turned up at all to the last one or the one before. Me: “you’re an hour late, Mr A I won’t be able to see you, I’m fully booked till the end at 7.30.” Him: “it’s ok, I’ll wait.” Me: “er…no.” Cheeky MF. He left.

I had breakfast in bed (no coffee, slightly charred pain au chocolat - coffee situation redeemed pronto) flowers, a sweet teddy bear, fudge and a beautifully worded card. No pressure, T1 later… am now prepping roast beef dinner incl pineapple tart tatin as too tight to pay for dinner out.

Also my desire to cook the dinner on any night has expired six months before I can officially enter my “on toast” child free era

Feeling a bit meh so I’ve knocked back a vitamin D with a gin and tonic to cover all bases

Watched Adolescence today. Possibly not as shocked/horrified etc as some as a) two boys b) teach that age (ish). Powerful, moving, unbelievably well acted, thought provoking, and hopefully starting some conversations.

I always remember a smug married on the other place posting that it was “such a trope” in movies when single woman can’t do up a zip or a bracelet on their own and having just tried for ten minutes to zip a back zip up I could blow as raspberry in their face right now

Never in the history of anticipation have I ever been more disappointed than finally getting my hands on M&S lemon curd hot cross buns.

🅦🅞🅡🅓🄸🄿🄻🅈 #811 🌟 Length Score: 93% 🚀 Letter Score: 73 🔗 Play Wordiply: www.wordiply.com 🎬 Today's starter: 🄻🄰🅂

Just watching dog agility on Crufts and looking at Rafferty languidly licking his non existent balls

I’ve got two days not going into work. WFH all day tomorrow (!) and then my mental health day on Friday when I am going away to London for the weekend 🎉

www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio... Paradise on Disney plus. Thank me later.

I moved my bedroom round last night and then slept 10.15-7.45. Is this a coincidence? (It’s ok, I’m on holiday)

I know Love is Blind is bollocks but I love it so

I am in Anglesey and this makes me happy

Like A Prayer Borderline Miles Away Power of Goodbye Ray of Light