Chris Leyhe
@chrisleyhe.bsky.social
📤 8
📥 14
📝 152
Music lover. VA lover.
Children are the "Beautiful Enslavement". Once your first is born, nothing else matters. Your most deepest, primal animal instincts take over and suddenly, your sole purpose on this Earth is to give them everything you never had.🥲💚👍
1 day ago
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Bringing a dog named Shark to the beach was a bad mistake.
8 days ago
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Soy milk is just regular milk introducing itself in Spanish.
14 days ago
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A debut album is like a fart. It doesn't last long after you cut it.
19 days ago
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Tradition is just peer pressure from the dead.
22 days ago
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I don't know about anyone else, but I really need to teach my facial expressions how to use their inside voice.
27 days ago
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The definition of stalking: When two people go out for a romantic walk together....but only one of them knows it.
about 1 month ago
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After getting a physical at a doctor's office, a man was told by his doctor "You're in good shape, but you need to stop masterbating". The man said "Why? Is it unhealthy?" The doctor said "No, but you're scaring everyone in the waiting room".
about 1 month ago
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Murals can be quite beautiful. They're very large and in some cases quite detailed. They not only display the skill, but also the passion of the artist. But ultimately....they simply tell you that you are in a bad neighborhood.
about 2 months ago
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There are only 29,220 days in 80 years. In retrospect, that's not much time. Do what you can with them.
about 2 months ago
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Statistically: 50% of those who tried dating apps said that they had a positive experience.... The other half are still missing...
about 2 months ago
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The worst thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.
2 months ago
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Am I getting older? Or are grocery stores playing cooler music nowadays.
3 months ago
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A foolish man complains about a hole in his pocket, but a wise man uses it to scratch his b*lls.
3 months ago
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A wize man once said "Sex is like pizza. Even when it's lousy, it's still pretty good".🤔
4 months ago
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Ah! The day before Thanksgiving! My 11th Anniversary without a cigarette!🥳🥳🥳
6 months ago
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A question for the ages... Is "asscheecks" one word? Or should they be seperated.🤔
6 months ago
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Many people think it would be really cool if Pegasuses existed in real life. But when you think of what a pigeon does to a windshield, what do you think a horse would do?
about 1 year ago
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I remember when the most most painful thing about being alone on Valentines Day is that it feels like the whole world is having a party but you're not invited. Just remember, Valentines is 1 out of 365 of a year of not felling so isolated. After that, it's smooth sailing.👍
over 1 year ago
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When you think about it, the elf on the shelf is just a "snitch action figure".
over 1 year ago
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It's only a matter of time before the leash of YT tightens around the necks of social media influencers until the rules of posting content will be identical to the rules of posting an episode of Sesame Street. All the while, non-premiun subscribers will recieve 80% ads and 20% content.
over 1 year ago
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Fun fact: The tip of 7 out of 8 tentacles of an octopus are actually meant for grasping. The tip of the eight tentacle is literally "THEIR JUNK". Just imagine holding hands with an opposite-gendered person and "WHAMMO". You're carrying offspring. No wonder they've been around as long as dinosaurs
over 1 year ago
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I accidentally used my dog's shampoo. Now I feel like such a good boy.
over 1 year ago
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A stranger who freshly enters your life is simply a friend or enemy that you haven't met yet. Only time will tell if they bless or burden you. But at least, hear them out.
over 1 year ago
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Speaking as someone who's lived roughly 1/3 of a century on this Earth. I can tell you this. At some point in life, someone's going to see how reputably kind & moral you are and see you as someone who will make them more popular if they villainize you. I'm kinda going through this right now.
over 1 year ago
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🦃HAPPY THANKSGIVING 🦃 To those who celebrate!😊
over 1 year ago
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Sadly enough....News of all the good things you've done for others will eventually age and become yesterdays news, and no one will care. Happily enough....News of anything immoral or scandalous you've done will also age and become yesterdays news, and again, no one will care. It kinda balances out.
over 1 year ago
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Although VAs are my favorite of "single Vs" I absolutely adore Triple Vs (VA, Vtuber, Vocalist). I love double Vs (VA + Vtuber, or VA + Vocalists), but "Triple Vs (VA + Vtuber + Vocalists) absolutely win my heart!🥰
over 1 year ago
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I just joined this platform about a week ago. If you're here and I'm subbed to you on YT, be patient. I'll find you.😊💚👍
over 1 year ago
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you reached the end!!
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