In an act of pure desparation... I have been able to scrounge together an additional 49 hours from the local timespace.... A blessing from Abraham Lincoln himself... don't ask how.

I am running out of time.....

If you can't stand me when I'm old and decrepit, then you don't deserve me while I'm young and spritely.

Do you guys think that the ppl who work in Microsoft's development team just smoke weed and watch tech-deck videos/Marvel movie summaries all day and write maybe two lines of actual code per week? I'm thinking yeah.

Yeah bro, you paid $99whatever for Windows 11??? Yeah you've just purchased PEAK TECHNOLOGICAL INNOVATION... You get: Services and functions that are just MISSING or UNFINISHED, shitty tech support from underpaid third-worlders... It's like a project car bro c'mon you gotta fix it yourself

my xbox blow out what do i do

Three billion years of hitting on the Starbucks barista and I STILL wouldn't reach spiritual ascendancy...

58 y/o married white guys will say things like "the ol' ball and chain" or "I got a BAG at home!" And still choose to engage in copulation with said ball and chain in the missionary position with the lights off. How does one reconcile with this dichotomy?

Nah fuck going to medieval times and giving peasant children Warheads candy, I'm going to 1840s Germany to give Carl Friedrich Gauss a Texas Instruments TI-Nspire CX and letting him accelerate advances in science and mathematics by centuries.

You KNOW that when the blood-alcohol content of these people reaches above a certain level, their eyes become a hollow abyss as their soul is ablated, becoming an entity of pure chaos only seen in flip-phone flash photos. Paint-thinner. not. even. once.

CONGRATULATIONS. You have just LOCKED IN on the GROUND FLOOR of a SOCIAL MEDIA BREAKTHROUGH... Will YOU be the one to shine like the stars..? Or will you be lost to the FLAME WAR... Only time will tell... ...see you on the FORUMS, KID.

Feels so empowering and culturally sensitive to be able to talk to my Nordic friends in their preferred tongue by replacing all the vowels with v's... Why yvs Jvhvnn, vt vs nvcv wvvthvr wvrv hvvvng...

Repost and Follow me if you like: - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!! - 🍻 Jägerbombs!!!