. . . or fish, or people out enjoying the ocean air, or whatever.

As gross as the idea of fucking Donald Trump in the throat may be this is pretty funny

It's important to plan ahead for your kids' financial future. Start a college fund for your first child, and then set up a bail fund for the second

A House of Dynamite does an excellent job of illustrating why it is a bad idea to staff our national security apparatus with Brits and Aussies

When the new furniture is to your liking

If there was a store whose entire business plan was "We don't sell on Amazon, ever," I would shop there all the time.

The vileness of the Trump administration is boundless and depthless.

Now that Tron: Ares has finally been released I can move on to focusing on how little I am anticipating this movie. share.google/D9eCMitrKpdo...

Is it really necessary for both of these movies to be out at the same time

Inflatable nylon novelty costume manufacturers profiteering off of a looming US civil war is just not something I would have predicted

Good Lord these people are such fucking lunatics

The folks at the Nobel Committee should find some helpful guy named Donald Trump . . . eltarry to give the Peace Prize to.

How nice for them. Also, why does America suck so very fucking much?

Today in redundancy: "Irritating turn from Jared Leto."

Again with the helicopters.

Just out of curiosity, what are the morbidity statistics regarding anorexia in older populations?

We live pretty much right under the flight path a helicopter would take going from the White House to Walter Reed and I feel like annoying chopper noise has been more common than usual today. Probably just wishful thinking though.

I watched The Thursday Murder Club and thought it was curiously slack and lifeless and overlit and overdressed and--oh, directed by Chris Columbus. Now I get it.

I feel like if your job title is "President of the United States" then openly beating up on some of those states is . . . not right?

Look at this spooky Halloween pic of an abandoned mental hospital hallway shot through a fence! . . . that I took after I accidentally turned on the camera when my phone was lying on the radiator unit in the bathroom.

I've discovered the all-"Law & Order" channel and my family isn't happy about it

I've seen it asked "Why did One Battle After Another flop?" and the answer is "Because it's based on a Thomas Pynchon book and you can tell."

I'd be all right with the comedians playing the Riyadh Comedy Festival if it were understood that the penalty for failing to get a laugh meant their tongues would be cut out.

Using American cities as "training grounds" for the US military seems to me to be a uniquely moronic idea. They'd be terrible training grounds--way too soft and compliant at the beginning to learn anything, but they'd quickly become the most hellaciously violent resisters on earth.

Our house is haunted this week. Haunted by the walnut tree.

Is it true that like a third of Bluesky posters are self-published romantasy novelists, or is there some other reason they all keep popping up in my feed?

Just had an interaction with an ICE ERO team, who were standing around loafing in an alley after having already taken a guy into custody and he'd been carted away. "You should get another job," I told the fattest, whitest one. "Nah, this one pays really well," the tubby evil fuck replied.

"The Trump plan does have some unanswered questions . . ." has got to be one of the more obvious and unnecessary caveats ever uttered.

This movie is apparently based on the book Nuclear War: A Scenario by Annie Jacobsen, which leads one to believe that it will NOT have a happy ending.

I'm sorry, what? What the fuck is an "AI actress"? "Computer Program Projected onto Screen" sounds less punchy I guess.

I mean, if it was my job to make a movie I'd cast Chloe Coleman and Chase Infiniti as sisters but that's just me.

Must be so wild to work in Hollywood. "I got a supporting role in a big sci-fi film!" "That's awesome, who's the lead?" "Jared Leto." "Oh. Well. At least your Equity insurance will be set for a while."

Never got hooked on Tiktok, so I got that going for me

Please sue each other into oblivion, you twin twats www.theguardian.com/technology/2...

My kind of book. A little Larry McMurtry, a little Richard Russo, some Wallace Stegner, E. L. Doctorow, and Stephen King thrown in, almost a thousand pages long--just a delight to read.

Man, that Nate Bargatze is one multitalented dude

Seems at least possible that the Rapture really did happen yesterday, and all the truly good Christians who actually deserve to go straight to heaven did so--the fact that there are influencers and megachurch preachers and Hillsong parishioners and whatever still around, that doesn't prove anything.

I hope this experience encouraged the train to quit wasting time and go faster in the future

I mean, my experience isn't vast but I think it might be true that the Amish are ALL at least partially autistic

This is so weird--this guy is bummed out that not enough people celebrated him for opening a box of toys.

So if I don't get Raptured tomorrow, that means I'll have to spend eternity in hell after I die? But until then I get to love on an earth where all the people who believed in the Rapture are gone? FAIR TRADE

I assume Disney reckons folks will come creeping back once the furor blows over but I gotta say, at 14 and 7 both my kids LOVE the idea of standing up to the Trump Administration any way they can.

I am a fierce advocate for whatever method of speech suppression there is that would guarantee that I never have to hear a thing Ross Douthat says ever ever again.

We--I--went apple-picking today and it was a mistake. So many apples. So many.

One of my firmest and most deeply held convictions is that no one should ever have to listen to someone named "Markwayne."

It's that some people are assholes I don't need to click this link

I believe that most despots crack down on comedians because they want to control dissent for political reasons but with Trump it's genuinely because his widdle feewings get hoit.

Disney+ just sent a follow-up email asking for details on why we cancelled our subscription on Thursday, sheesh.