Does anybody remember? What are humans supposed to talk about?

Ok. I’ve been on here too much today. Your cats and pups are wonderful, and you are all very funny. I need to go hide again now.

Is Starbucks using “I’m Gonna Be (500 miles)” in their radio ads because they’ve had to close so many locations that you will walk 500 miles to get to your local store?

Anybody else’s time with their family just an ongoing Facebook highlight reel?

I will not give in to, “just go to sleep and do it in the morning. It’ll be fiiiine”

Old habits die hard. And die hard is a Christmas movie

Did they schedule Pluribus so that all of the episodes will be out in time to watch while we’re visiting family and friends who subscribe to AppleTV+ over the holidays?

I never really paid attention to the lyrics of Run, Run, Rudolph, but as someone who grew up in a Christian church I always assumed the line about “the boy child” was about Jesus

Landman is the follow-up to Aquaman

Where can I learn some *light* black magic?

Newspaper? More like noosepaper, amIright?…

No one hates being brushed more than any cat I’ve ever known

Turn dead malls into GenX retirement homes.

The job of an ad executive is no longer about selling product. It’s using product to annoy viewers so much they spend money for the ad-free version

Will the re-release of Kill Bill include the new Fortnite chapter?

TFW you’ve lived long enough to understand why your grandmother was always depressed at Christmastime

RufusAI™ completely loses interest in chatting the moment you ask if Sweet Baby Bezos is dreaming of using your money to get back to space

YouTube Commercial Roulette is when you repeatedly reload a video trying to get a shorter commercial at the front. I will gladly reload a video for a minute and a half to not watch a 45 second ad spot…

My favorite Oasis song is that one Chemical Brothers song that whichever Gallagher sings on

“If you have ghosts, then you have everything.”

Im not doing it again. I CANT do it again.