I want The Pitt to cast me as a small therapy horse who wakes kids up from anesthesia by smashing a synthesizer with its face

Why does my dog beg to be given marshmallows. How did I raise this decadent little boy king

Something I think about a lot is that if I ever had a baseball walk up song it would be “Sixteen Tons” by Tennessee Ernie Ford

Had a nail biting relapse and bit my poor nails to the quick, and you know what, I deserve credit that I held out this long given LITERALLY EVERYTHING

Tried to flush out sinuses, may have actually just injected saline into brain??

Does anyone else have the thing where the more everyone loves and is talking about a TV show, the less they feel able to watch it?

“Am I being a helicopter mom if I help my dog solve her snuffle mat” - a thing I just said out loud to no one

I regret to inform you I have done it again (eaten an entire tin of sour candies in one sitting)

Ah it’s good to be back on a Twitter-esque app again, so I can scroll through people’s posts and become absolutely sick with anxiety #hahaha #wonderful

PSA: All of David Lynch's features have just dropped at archive dot org, including Industrial Symphony No 1, Hotel Room, and the Duran Duran concert

Every time Kendrick Lamar performs Not Like Us I imagine Drake’s body slowly crumbling like that guy in Looper

A reminder that books by Canadian authors published by independently owned Canadian presses are almost always printed in Canada. The GST holiday ends on Valentine's Day so show #CanLit some love and head out to your local independent bookstore this week or next.❤️📚

was mostly keeping it together until I read Kyle MacLachlan's tribute to David Lynch

I’m replaying Arkham City and I’m preemptively anxious about having to fight Mr. Freeze. Nowhere near that part of the game and I’m already stress watching walkthroughs.

I hate that Wayfair thinks I want this.

Somebody Somewhere is a miracle.

Very weird to be posting on an app for the first time again. I feel a lot of pressure to do this properly and make a good impression. But I'm also me, so I'm just going to say I have a tummy ache from eating too many onions. #Hi