Very traumatic night Pet death. Hearing my sister cry over the phone, just to have my selfish parents make her feel worse and lock me outside the house for an hour. At night. Alone. I sat on my mom's car until my twin fell asleep before finding my way inside. My nerves are shot

One thing that always makes me feel exhausted is trying to explain a very real mental health struggle to a family member who could care less. Talking abt a diagnosis I got a while back (unspecified sleep disorder) and how I've been struggling and all I get is "just go bed at night" :|

It's been so rough lately, and with an impending birthday, all I want to do is retreat and be alone I have such an overwhelming sense of dread and panic slowly accumulating within me

Nothing makes me more upset than when ppl don't take accountability for stuff. Passage of time isn't an apology. Popping up and acting like nothing happened isn't going to magically smoothe things over. Legit I don't want to talk to ppl when they owe me an apology. Just fess up to it bro.

Daisy, my elderly dog, is doing so much better She no longer stumbles and is back to her old self. Tomorrow is her last day on meds! :]

Guess who got sick Both me n my dog are going through it rn lmaooo

The absolute hysterics I was in when my childhood dog started stumbling..only to find out from the vets that she has old dog vertigo. She's okay!! And actually pretty healthy for being 15 Daisy is home and recovering ❤️

I just realized I never explained what my little dude is. He's a bilbly w floppy ears. His glasses are round bc I got some Harry potter ass glasses going on that I wear...if I remember to...

Recent doodles from when I feel well enough to draw Been super exhausted lately ugh

On today's misadventures: I lost my balance while babysitting my brother's dog and took a door handle straight to the dome ((I'm okay, it wasn't that hard. Still..ouch))

Something that makes me happy when dystonic symptoms get really bad and I get bummed out is that I like to watch videos of cats w cerebellar hypoplasia. They're just like me frfr (also known as wobbly cat syndrome)

How life is going rn Also I really want raising canes rn

This dystonia shit is so ass. My coordination is so off that I stumble, fine motor movements like picking stuff up is challenging with the added difficulty of my tremors, and it's so exhausting that I've been donking out for hours

Why is my cat such a diva

I forgot to share Cadaver, who's part of a personal project I'm working on I not only inflicted the poor bastard with my own trauma, but he's also going to experience ADR due to meds he's put on later All u need to know is that he's a retired test subject who lives w an adoptive family

My twin is moving away tomorrow...I'm totally not bummed out by it..

My sweet baby ❤️

Just an update to say that if I seem upset, it has nothing to do with anyone 🙏 I apologize if I come off cross or snappy, I'm not meaning to I'm just stressed rn

Experiencing acute dystonic symptoms again due to my meds, so that means it's benadryl time The horrors persist, but I persist harder...after I wake from my nap

I have been a bit mentally unwell the last few days, but being sent goofy tiktoks definitely grounded me for a bit I'm okay! Just working through some things

When the living situation is so ass that I have to mediate the family dispute and half of the time I'm doing this bc these mf keep interrupting each other.

Sometimes I remember moments where I've been flustered or blushed at a compliment and I will physically clutch my heart to keep myself composed

I have such a bad habit of falling asleep w my phone in my hand, either while listening to music or talking mid convo 😭 I donk out so fast

Hey uh..fuck studio orange 🖕 I wasn't against giving studio orange a chance when Trigun stampede first dropped. But the concept art that was released is absolutely not okay. Like...I thought we were over stereotypical racial designs by now...I'm so disappointed 🥀

How I feel everytime I wake up from a midday nap

That new TADC episode had no right being the message I needed to hear right when I started working on my attachment issues 😭 Kinger saying "giving space should never be the same as giving up on someone" felt so personal I erupted into tears. Goated episode.

Gang, I need u to listen to me..bc the epiphanies I be having in my bed while rolling around like a gas station hotdog are profound. When working on my attachment stuff, at first I was like "ough..💔" But u know what I realized? This is priming me for deeper connections. It's growing pains.

Something that I've run into while working on my attachment issues is I get very strong depersonalization/dissociative response from it and it's some of the strongest I've ever dealt with. Good news is, it's getting easier to work on my attachment everyday!

Comm for a friend on discord Thanks for commissioning me pookie 🫶

Been doing much thinking, so I'm going to share my thoughts from the perspective of an anxious attached person and the conclusion I came to when doing research abt attachment. I've met alot of avoidant ppl,even dated a few. And for a while, I never knew why it never worked out (cont.)

Sigmund, my draft horse/ red river hog fella. Stoic stalwart who loves taking care of other ppl, but is learning to advocate for himself to be taken care of. Learning to set boundaries so his willingness to help isn't taken for granted. Lightning strikes when his temper flares

I don't remember drawing this but the Higgs brainrot is real ig 😂

I'm on another plane of existence rn Help

Woe,painting be upon ye

Getting alot of rain tonite and it's putting me to sleep

Ough..I know I talk abt it all the time on here, but healing can be just as brutal as it can be beautiful. I've been dealing with both grief and anxiety and I was perplexed because I had no idea what my anxiety was trying to tell me.

Finally got some art done this week! This is my most recent character, Cambrian. He works in a museum and takes folks on tours of the fossils on display, and when he's not particularly busy, he focuses on fossil restoration Part raptor, part dog Can be rude to ppl playing w his heart

Have been having the worst anxiety of my life recently, as it comes in ebbs and flows. It's it's been a very good exercise in talking about how I feel to my support system instead of just bottling it up. It's like 97% panic and 3% depersonalization

Put all my pins onto my beanie One half genshin, one half Pokémon

I had super duper mega burnout and depression after the con bc I miss everyone but I'm slowly starting to come out of it and back into my creative headspace again, yippe!! Got some art to work on now

A thread of songs I have been throwing it back to this week

@dreamwalker20.bsky.social I love my twin, send post

I love that a majority of my con experience has been me saying this to people so far

Almost forgot, these were gifts for my most coolest and favoritest person ever, @larvalparasitoid.bsky.social I adore Nik with his large meat dumpling :]

Slept for about 12 hours or so Con prepping has been grueling on my body and I'm very sore n sleepy still

I have the hotspring song from Death stranding 2 stuck in my head and my poor twin has shouldered the brunt of my DS2 fixation. I've been humming it all day and I caught my twin also starting to hum it to herself too. It's infectious.

What do you MEAN that nightow made a tribute to a mangaka who was caught with cp on their computer..is nothing fucking sacred 😭 I feel so sick bc I LOVE Trigun, but I now absolutely lost all respect for nightow. Fuck that dude.