Thinking today about the women who shaped me. One rejected the religion of her ancestry and turned down an arranged marriage, walked away from tradition, and bravely built a life on her own terms. Her 'no' was a quiet, radical act of rebellion. 🧵

When you’ve spent your entire life being taught there’s only one way to be happy, it takes incredible courage to say “I’m not happy here”. To all who have left the religions that harmed you and built a new life for yourself, I see you. I honor you. We have risen. ❤️

Real divine inspiration from church leaders would look like protecting victims. It would not look like shaming them, blaming them, or demand they forgive their abusers. It certainly would never include excommunicating them. Inspired leadership would never lead to punishing the wounded.

A huge problem with religion is, "does this theology cause harm?" is never asked. It’s just, "is it true?" Once you’ve decided your beliefs are true, the harm caused is irrelevant and can be blamed on the failure of person claiming harm, rather than blaming the harmful theology.

The church was built for married men, designed to serve their needs and reinforce their authority. So when married Mormon men tell me how much peace and happiness the church brings them, it's like no shit, dude. You're benefiting from a system made explicitly for you.

1️⃣ As an unmarried Mormon, the stress of being single was overwhelming. It was hard enough to be alone, but knowing my eternal happiness and salvation depended on marriage was both painful and terrifying. 💔

When I first left Mormonism, it felt like my world crumbed and the floor dropped out below me. That’s to be expected when you realize your entire worldview is incorrect. The good news is that it gets better and as you put your life back together, life is more beautiful than ever.

Why didn't I leave or speak up after my first temple experience, even though it felt unsettling, bizarre, and even creepy? Because belonging was more important than my discomfort. 👇🏼

I’ve often felt angry at myself for not leaving Mormonism sooner; remaining in a place where I was miserable, unwelcome and forced to hide myself from those closest to me. But my struggle was not stupid or foolish. It took the time it took and happened the way it happened.

The first time you are presented to converse with god at the veil.

When I stopped believing in Santa, the magic left Christmas. When I stopped believing in Jesus’ divinity, the sacredness left too. Now, Christmas is about cherishing relationships, gratitude, and respecting winter’s call to rest. However you spend the holiday, I wish you a good one.

You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf, but have you heard of Lurch the Church? It’s a game where, instead of jumping through hoops to keep an illusion of belief alive, you simply stop going to church. Fun, simple, and no cognitive dissonance required!

Trying to accept that I will never be able to achieve a healthy work/life balance without being rich enough to afford to hire help.

🎶 Dashing through the snow in a one-tapir open sleigh 🎶

To be fair, the prophets only said they won't lead you astray; they never said they won't fuck you up.

A god that works in mysterious ways looks suspiciously a lot like a god who does not exist.

“It's just one of those Sundays", Mormons will say to themselves knowing full well they are in a religion that never has any other type of Sunday. When every Sunday is a blur of meetings, responsibilities, and endless to-do lists—but you still call it a ‘day of rest.’ 😜

The marriage privilege within Mormonism can make unmarried people feel alone, isolated and unimportant. I was a faithful, unmarried adult for almost two decades, I’ve felt this discrimination first hand. It’s difficult when you belong to a church that idolizes marriage.

I hosted family for Thanksgiving and since I don’t believe in God, I don’t pray. Cue the Mormon awkwardness with everyone standing around waiting for me, the host, to kick things off with a prayer. So I said: “I’m grateful you’re all here, now let’s eat before we all starve.” Just as effective.

I didn’t choose to be a Mormon; that choice was made for me by my parents. Leaving was perhaps the first real choice I ever made.

I notice I carry a lot of anxiety about never making a mistake at work—like I need to be perfect to feel secure and valued. When I do make a mistake, I end up being incredibly hard on myself, even imagining I’ll get fired, even though logically I know that’s not true. 1/3

Today feels like the day I first felt disillusioned with the LDS Church. I wanted so much for it to be what I believed and hoped it to be—a good, honest, noble organization. It broke me to realize it wasn’t. Today, I feel that same hurt and disappointment in America.

A haunted house, but it’s full of Young Women leaders saying, “Modest is hottest, but we’re not here to judge…”

I cannot believe I was indoctrinated to believe that a man who doesn’t earn his Eagle Scout Award won’t be a good husband and father.

2024 intentions -be thoughtful with how I spend my time -express gratitude freely and often -romanticize my life -ask more questions -spend time sitting quietly outside -talk to myself with kindness -lead with sympathy -make more meals to share with friends Tell me yours 👇🏼

You’re allowed to talk about what the church and/or its members did to you and how it hurt you. It doesn’t matter how Mormons feel about you talking about it or if they shame you for talking about it. If Mormons want people to think better of them, they can start by being better.

Heavenly Mother’s name is Eloher.

The Mormons in my personal life don’t understand how much I DON’T SAY about the church for the sake of our relationship. They are free to post “think celestial” memes and conference talks daily but if I dare speak out about how I feel, they will feel attacked and despise me.

My mom, in all seriousness, told me she doesn’t believe in silly superstitions, while I know full well she WILL NOT let her garments touch the floor.

10 Things Mormons Like That I Don’t 1. Attending church 2. Illogical doctrine 3. Never feeling good enough 4. Polygamy 5. Temple rites 6. Garments 7. Joseph Smith 8. Feeling superior 9. Racist and sexist doctrine 10. A vengeful god

Hi. I’m Abish and I used to want to die but that’s before I found ✨Leaving Mormonism✨

Me: church was painful for me, I felt alone and ostracized and like I didn’t matter. It hurts and I’m suffering. Mormons: Sorry you feel that way. Come back to church, we don’t actually ostracize people. My proof is I’ve never felt that way.

There’s more water bottles (4) in Bednar’s day of apostolic ministry then there are women or POC (0).

There’s more bald men (3) in Bednar’s day of apostolic ministry then there are women or POC (0).

There’s more artificial plants (13) in Bednar’s day of apostolic ministry then there are women or POC (0).

There are more candy bowls (6) in the day of Bednar’s apostolic ministry than there are women (0).

Men: what are your thoughts on the parable of the 10 virgins? I have some questions but I don’t want to lead your answers.

Today I celebrate my 1-yr anniversary of my resignation from the Mormon church! 🎉 A huge thanks to me for getting out & doing the hard work of deconstruction. A big thanks to my ExMo fam for your caring & support. Yay! Hell Yes! 😀 👇 👇 👇

I told my therapist that when my family or friends tell people about my church status they will say “I stopped going to church”. He replies: that’s an overly simplistic and dismissive way to describe what actually happened. I think about that a lot.

I’ve had this tree for years but it never grew beyond 3-4’ tall until I moved & it finally had the right conditions to thrive. I too, was living under conditions that failed to nourish me and until I abandoned Mormonism and the ideology that broke and abused me, I was alive but not thriving.

What I’m not doing: ❌ trying to fix the church ❌ trying to convince people to leave ❌ mocking believers ❌ being mean What I am doing: ✅ sharing my story ✅ making friends ✅ empowering people ✅ shining a light on the harm the church causes

The thing is the church *could* be better but it chooses not to be.