Get a load of these bozos

Had never seen a cuck chair for shitting until yesterday

It would be so funny if Barnaby Joyce rolled Pauline Hanson for the party leadership

Two words baby: pancake wagon

They need to do a hybrid AFL x NRL type game like they did with AFL and Gaelic football

Jumble the letters in ‘art fair’ around and you can create new words like ‘fart air’

The QLD Maroons could beat any AFL State of Origin team

A lot of people don’t realise it but we’re actually living in the Golden Age of Custody Photos

The Australian urge to wanna hit the streets and start daring strangers when you find fifty bucks in your jacket pocket

When you’re trying to dig out an ingrown hair

Would love to recreate my favourite Italian story when I visit in a few months

I’m with Team Sweden in this curling debate cause have you seen that Canadian guy’s face? Very annoying looking guy

Angus Taylor has named Angus Taylor as Shadow Minister for Angus Taylor

Look my only advice to Joan Jett would be to maybe change the line to: I don’t give a DARN about my reputation. People might be put off by the use of the word ‘damn’. Other than that, keep rockin’ Joan!

I just wanna know who an Oscar Piastri signature burger from Grill’d is supposed to be aimed at. Who’s buying this?

You would think based on Saint Basil’s cathedral that Russians would be better at cake decorating than they are

We should build a grandstand at Cahill’s Crossing so we can watch people as they make the biggest mistakes of their life

AI fucking sucks but my new Nelson Mandela voicemail greeting is soooo good

Happy Valentine’s Day I just bought a new cat litter scoop cause Meatball did a shit so big and dense the last one snapped when I went to scoop it up

I’m begging for even a single Australian politician to be capable of buying and wearing a nice suit

What in the fuck is a hotspur? Tottenham should be called something like the Tottenham Baked Beans or the Tottenham Fightin’ Jellied Eels

Leadership spills are funny cause it means they all performatively walk into the party room in posses before the vote in the belief that we give a shit

I think what we’ve learnt from this Winter Olympics is that biathletes are all insane

It’s gonna be so funny if Angus Taylor loses the spill

I reckon Angus is gonna last as long as Downer did as leader

🌹Valentine’s Day 2026 Special Offer🌹 I will attend your house and play ‘My Sharona’ live on the bass guitar while you make love to your significant other. Once complete, I will then cook a special meal of crab cakes and a side (of your choosing) for you and your partner $225 (excl groceries)

I don't give Facebook permission to use my pictures, my information or my publications, both of the past and the future, mine or those where I show up. By this statement, I give my notice to Facebook it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute, give, sell my information, photos or take an

I like my coffee hot, my beer cold, and my heights wuthered

Lurching forward to powerfully deliver the words ‘Dengue fever’

Cupra brand cars look like they’d be popular amongst Division 3 soccer players

[Robbie Williams’ ‘Millennium’ plays]

Maybe if the scientists stopped moving the hands on this thing we wouldn’t be so close to annihilation?

Greg Bovino getting fired paves for the way for him to be on Dancing With The Stars next season

Eating a second wrap for lunch allows you to build on the success you achieved with the first wrap, refining and improving on the wrap that came before, without discarding its important legacy

What year are we in? What the hell is this?

If I was the mayor of Melbourne there would be people handing out Frosty Fruits and Sunny Boys across town today but you got who you voted for so sucked in

Would love to get one of those light up cod pieces the guy from Electric Six had in the Danger High Voltage video

Hi everyone, Bushwick Beckham here - the new Beckham child. Just wanna say that I think mum and dad are great! No qualms!

A young Conan O’Brien

So the entire Nationals front bench resigned tonight did you see this did you hear about this. I guess they knew there were some Ley-offs coming anyway *Hold for applause* Yes, yes yes folks we’ve got a great show coming up; Simon Helberg from the Big Bang Theory is here And music from Gorillaz!

Hi, I’m the Beckham’s new son, Bushwick. Brooklyn is gone and I’ll be taking his place in the family. Subscribe for updates. Can’t wait to have you along for the ride!

Out: Love Bombing In: Fart Bombing

That Naomi Osaka outfit is really giving a ‘Fashion-Forward Beekeeper from the Gold Coast’ vibe

I mean maybe WE’RE the crazy ones for letting the Jackass crew into our homes for a FIFTH time with a wonderful new film in the franchise!! I guess only time will tell. I’m Richard Wilkins

Seppos are truly incredible

The ENTIRE length of Lygon street is now a 40km/h zone and it’s fucking insane

Look if I could muster an inspiring act of heroism right now I would but it’s late and I’ve made a tea, so yeah. Timing’s off

It’s crazy they made Young Sheldon before Young Kramer

Emergency vehicles should announce the type of call they’re attending with the siren so we can make our own informed decisions

Rock on everyone