I had to set up authoritywith British Gas to discuss my mum's account with them because she's deaf. It had to be done by telephone. The person from BG said "Is your mother in the room with you now?" & I burst out laughing.

Somebody on X called me dead and without a soul because I said I liked the film American Beauty. I probably shouldn't tell them I don't have a reflection, then...

Where are those currently in "hotels" awaiting the outcome of asylum processes supposed to go? Some will say "back to where they came from" but asylum seekers flee for a reason. Imagine your own children escaping war & oppression & then immediately being thrown back into it. Have some compassion.

Jeremy Vine on Radio 2 talking about the ATC problem yesterday, wailing "WHY does it always happen when people are going on holiday?" Um...let's think about it, Jeremy: maybe because the majority of people on planes are...going on holiday, so any ATC outage is going to affect mostly holidaymakers?

Is it my imagination (I don't think so, as I have quite a good ear) or is the Chancellor of the Exchequer sounding a bit like a dalek in her public statements?

Does anyone else put a pan of eggs on to hard boil for later use in a salad, see them starting to boil, think "Right: I'll give those 5 minutes" then consistently/persistently wander off and forget them for 20 or until you smell scorching? Every. Single. Time.

#Newsnight Alex Phillips trying to steamroller Zarah Sultana & attempting to minimise the damaging language of Starmer's "island of strangers"/"incalculable damage" speech by making a weak ""joke" about the genitive.

Does anyone find it odd that the eventual outcome of the papal conclave is being discussed in the news in terms of "a winner"? I know it's a technically correct description but it seems rather undignified to me. I'm neither Catholic nor religious so it's also giving me a bit of existential angst.

Does anyone else, when buying <seedless easy peelers> find themselves singing the words to the tune of "Peaceful Easy Feeling" by the Eagles? Every single time for me. And when I make cheese scones it's Daryl Hall and John Oates...

Spent the entire day waiting for someone from E.ON to change my soon-to-be 88 mother's power meters. Received a text this morning to say appt set for 12-4, then another to say tgey'd be here 12-12.30. Nobody came. Phonelines are closed and WhatsApp contact line is off because "It's a holiday" 😡

Last Christmas, I lost my debit card. It was only out in the wild for around 90 minutes & no immediate harm was done but it was 6 weeks before a replacement eventually reached me. When it did it came with a new PIN. I'd had my old PIN for decades. We had a good relationship. I ought to have kept it

Why do we even have an April Fools' Day? People are fools every month of the year.

I've set a loaf of bread to rise. I suspect it's going to be MASSIVE so I have both kitchen doors open.

Today is National Linguistics Day. Hurrah! Go us!

So is it a tie in the sambathon?

Haha! Imagine expecting an amateur dancer to be anything like Gene Kelly, Craig.

The overnight snow has revealed a leak in the roof 😐 No doubt this will be costly. Summoning all my positivity and being thankful that I HAVE a roof, at least.

People are posting photos of their bookcases. Here's one of mine. Please forgive picture quality: I've never been that kind of artistic/creative.

Week 2 and I've reached a score of followers. Keeping it going, slowly and steadily :-)

I'm puzzled by the whole "starter pack" approach to community-building. It's all a bit "Oh: you just arrived? Go & knock on these people's doors & ask to come in for tea" & as if the numbers matter more than the quality of interaction. I'll just have to stay down the small-group end of the pool.

My followers have now reached the Ides. Hurrah.

I just want to eat cheese all day and all evening today.

Yay! I've reached the Spinal Tap of followers. All the way up to 11 today.

Does anyone else get an overwhelming rush of Ready Brek smell whenever they hear the start of Edwin Starr's War?

This is my new favourite cartoon.

Is anyone watching MasterChef Professionals?

I had 485 followers on that other platform. Here, I have 1 and I can't tell you what a surprise even that is. Anyway. Hello, and here's to peace, calm and civility. We can dream.

Well, this is new.