Gaelic teachers will now be drafted in to make sure new residents of the barracks have "learned are language” [sic] before they are allowed to go about their business. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

"It's 106 miles to Sandringham, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses"

Inverness Tourist Board Marketing Tip #1: Confidence is paramount. 💯 #visitinverness

Sundays should be self-care days. 🚣 #visitinverness

Being useless has its perks. 🤖 #inspiration

One of the last remaining phone boxes in the Highland capital. #visitinverness

Emperor Trump took his chance to address world leaders in Davos today in a bid to persuade everyone that he's DEFINITELY NOT a baddie... 🇺🇸

Locals are being warned to avoid the area. #visitinverness

The ITB Weekend Weather Forecast. Yellow Alerts right across the gaff:

ICE agents spotted in Inverness today! 😲 #staysafe

The weather has left many Highland towns and villages isolated over the last few days. Delayed deliveries and dwindling supplies have forced many locals into 'experimenting' with alternative food supplies... 🐷🍼

You can now help choose which mineral-rich country the USA invades next! 🌍 Just cast your vote at your local McDonald's, and you can help America chore another rake of natural resources from more unsuspecting foreign powers! 🍔

World News 🌍 FIFA fixes embarrassing admin error and awards the correct prize to President Donald J. Trump.

Just picked this up at Tescos. An absolute necessity for Christmas day!👌🎁 #christmas2025

Jesus Christ has been approached for comment. ✝️

From the teaboy who worked on that one good modern Godzilla film... Watch it this Christmas day on ITB2! 📺🎄

Inverness > Aberdeen

Wee Big Bird says...

The protests continue in Inverness this weekend. 🚮 We'd like to remind the good people of Inverness that we are a neutral, unbiased, non-partisan organisation - even when it comes to wee fascist fuds creeping into our glorious city. #dontbeafanny

Inverness Christians and capitalists were on the randan this weekend as the annual 'Showing of Santa's Stigmata' signalled the start of city's Christmas celebrations. 🕳️🎅🕳️ #visitinverness

Inverness - there's no better place to be. ♥️ #visitinverness

Reding iz so lasst yir. Get your retro doorstops at Leakey's Bookshop, Church Street, Inverness. 📚 #visitinverness

A day out with the kids doesn't have to cost a fortune. Take the family out for a day yelling at The Almighty! 🗣️ It's fun, free, and above all else, somebody needs to have a f*cking word. 👍 #vistinverness

This weekend, Inverness saw the first of a rake of unvetted, fighting-age men from exotic places like Aberdeen, stream into the Highland capital to protest against other unvetted, fighting-age men from miles away streaming into Inverness. 🪧 #visitinverness

❌Please do NOT feed the racists❌ #visitinverness

🇺🇸 🇬🇧 Last night, the King and Queen sucked up to a very odd couple from the colonies at a State Banquet at Windsor Castle.

People are beginning to wake up to this... ⏰ #DingwallDoesntExist By Fanny DeVito

Mr Wrong'un - available to buy now from ITB books. 🇬🇧 #dontbeafanny

"The more expensive the car, the more excruciating the chat" - Jane Austen

Another group of poor wee souls from across the firth lands on the blessed shores of Inverness, looking for a better life in the Highland capital. 🤝 #RefugeesWelcome

Squeeze some bees this September when Inverness Farmers Market returns next month.🐝 #visitinverness

Inverness mourns the aftermath of #StormFloris #visitinverness

Keir Starmer and his wife Victoria Starmer have arrived at Turnberry ahead of President Trump's direct download of mental patter straight into the Prime Minister's brain. 👂👈 #dontbeafanny

Here he comes!🍊 The President of the United States of America visits Scotland. 🇺🇸🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 #dontbeafanny #donaldtrump

Boots Inverness' new weight loss campaign met with mixed reactions from the public.💪 #visitinverness

Stagecoach has released a brand-new, more accurate method of checking when their buses will actually turn up. 🔮 #visitinverness

Fandan Bananaman - A short, shite poem by Fanny DeVito #visitinverness

In Defence of Seagulls - a short poem by Fanny DeVito #visitinverness

Keir Starmer has accepted an invitation to visit US President Donald Trump during his expected trip to Scotland this month 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🇺🇸 #visitscotland

🌏International News: NATO cosies up to "Daddy" Trump and confirms defence spending will rise to 5% of GDP #makeminceandtattiesnotwar

Breaking News: *We think* Oceania is now at war with Eurasia. 🤷 Or it could be Narnia? Either way, dem bad guys are gonnae get it. 🍊 #makeminceandtattiesnotwar

Lovely weather for it. Taps aff for the apocalypse. ☀️

The Highland Council gathered in Bellfield Park today to celebrate the summer solstice with the annual 'Burning of the Receipts', where councillor expenses are cleansed for another year. #visitinverness

Emergency refreshment arrives in Inverness as a city-wide 'It's Fuckeen Boileen' alert is issued. 🥵 #visitinverness

Available now from Waterstones Inverness. 📚 A perfect gift for the mooching b'stards in your life.

PM mobilises air defences as Middle East conflict escalates🫡 #makeminceandtattiesnotwar

The Stoltman Brothers are to appear at the Leonardo Hotel in Inverness this Friday for an evening of stories about lifting things up and then putting them back down again n' that. #VisitInverness

Anti-war demonstration at Inverness Town House attracts celebrity protestors. #makeminceandtattiesnotwar

Inverness colouring book coming soon! 🖍 Great for passing the time between buses, or for those dim of wit/went to the High Skool. 🥴 #VisitInverness

After hearing the bewildering news that Snoop Dogg is to open a burger van at Celtic Park, Susan Boyle has announced she's opening an ice cream van at Clachnacuddin FC's Grant Street Park. #visitinverness #scottishfootball