Ever watch a movie where it's like, 300% obvious that the writer/director is inserting some autobiographical details, but even the smart video essays treat the thing like a team just put some tropes in a bag, shook it, and pulled out a checklist? Trying not to spoil the show I'm thinking of.

Advice collumns for straight ppl in 2026 are like "HOW, WITHOUT GUNS, DO I FORCE THIS MANCHILD TO WASH HIS FIRST DISH" or "Respectfully wish that she'd stop pelting me with chihuahuas. Am I the asshole?"

Welp that new years optimism lasted like 2ish days this time, huh. Embarassing to be American.

I want one. Who do I pay what? My current spend controller is a mere human brain, and don't even get me started on the sub-Brexual geekiness of my rock seating.

A 16 year old lookin' customer just drove up to our trash bin and threw out maybe 20 baby pacifiers, all soaked in what looks like peach yogurt, wrapped in a humungous shower curtain. ????

New Years is the time of year I always find out which of my middle managers likes to drunk fucken drive.

One reason books are better than movies is that books only have 2 points of failure. If the writing doesn't suck and the writer doesn't suck, everything's groovy! Movies are like, hey let's bet the barn that none of the dozen millionaires on project are ever gonna say or do anything reprehensible.

Sir. Sir do you work here. Do you work here? Sir do you work here. Sir. Do you work here? I was just wonderring if you work here sir. Sir i was just asking because, sir don't interrupt me, I was just asking because I was just wonderring I was just gonna ask if

I resent how when magazines write about shows, they use an actor's name interchangably with a character's name back & forth. I came to your recap because I couldn't tell all 200 conventionally handsome mumblefucks apart, now I gotta learn everybody's jellical names?

Been drawing 30 years and this past 2 have been the worst because I also get sad little peptalks from reformed technocrats about how AI can't bring me down. Buddy, why would a tech CEO's disrespect be the final insult if the VIEWER'S hostility couldn't even stop me?

Astounded by all the horny shit that puppets are saying every minute of every day on cameo dot com.

Stop giving commissions an "it's a Christmas gift" deadline. You create a logjam fuckscape during the month(s) an artist could best benefit from their own talents. Drawing as a job barely pays 1/2 a pizza per hour, but once a year it allows furries to reciprocate big storebought gifts with doodles.

Dogtangle is an excellent comic.

Retail employee watching The Nutcracker with a giant foam finger that says "Go Rats" on it. Maybe they'll win this year!

I'd love to talk somewhere else!!

Pros of Blsky: ● Potentially make a new friend ● Fewer fascists, if compared to leading brand Cons of Blsky: ● Some sort of misery device ● User becomes enabler to friends trapped in misery device ● Tucks insidious crust data into beautiful drawings ● Somehow arresting & boring at the same time

What if there were a pokerap featuring all 1,025 but with the BPM and emotional tone of that ad where "Arms of the Angels" plays over the slideshow of neglected pets. And instead of rap it was also Christian funeral yodelling, just like in the ad.

This would be a good time to order from @fantagraphics.bsky.social.

it was a real pleasure that my first commission had such a great prompt and characters. for @vinvertigo.bsky.social

Customers constantly ask how we could charge $2.98 for a bottle of water and I have a few off putting joke responses like "You can re-use the bottle as a decanter so it's no longer plastic waste" and "you can drink from the garden hose for free." Someone actually took me up on the hose thing!

You can't describe the personal shit that actually occupies your thoughts on social media, but you also can't be all "Hey follow fam there's spooky mysterious unspeakable situation I won't describe. Leave a like & a concerned comment tho, I love metrics 😊🫶"

How is it that furries see themselves as a gatekeeperless community of welcoming open-minded kumbuya ppl, but every time we're nice to a diaper haver, someone's in our DMs hissing and asking us to beware the eery one.

I like badgers, I like cringey old men, I like 1970s children's novelty albums, but for some reason KISS does nothing for me.

TF trigger concepts: ● There's an animal on a food's packaging ● There's an animal in an idiom ● There's an animal in some videogame ● There's a weird necklace ● There's an inanimate object in an idiom ● There's an inanimate object in some videogame ● An object is needed ● A noun was used

Everybody fussing over what's safe for Work like Work is gonna die of shock in its Victorian fainting chair if your lockscreen is too sultry a drawing of Mr. Nogoodnik from Bad Guys 3. Meanwhile Work is over here casually trying to give me heatstroke & a UTI on the daily

Got a copy of Moho 14, because I assume I'll be okay at it.

I dunno if there's a more consistent predictor of whether somebody sucks than they get mad at pigeons. I haven't had a chance to pigeon test all of you, but, so far, everybody who SUCKS in my life, if I've seen them near a pigeon, they were mad at it.

Just 1 more week and I have a humane work schedule. If anyone wants to hang out in Seattle (inexpensively) in September hit me up.

The crime in Washington DC is truly outrageous tho. One time I watched aliens blow up the white house with president Bill Pullman still in it. I also saw this Youtube clip where one of the Capitol critters bops the other on the snout so hard it makes kind of a diving board sound.

One of the things that has pretty annoying is that if you have any kind of bullshit meter, if you have anything inside of yourself that doesn’t enjoy being lied to, the last couple of years of almost every area of public life have been driving you up a fucking wall

Weapons was really interesting! I'm glad it lived up to Barbarian. There's something about commedians directing horror where they do a much better job?

True art is born of hardship so it's actually kinda cool that humanities majors gotta groom 40+ parasocial friends in order to GoFundMe what their insurance won't cover. The attention to detail on the snouts of some of this true hardship art is just, chef's kiss emoji. A++ nostril stuff, hubba hubba

Meat option people.

There's pretty much only 3 good things a movie can do. Depress you until you cry, have a puppet, or have a cartoon.

Been on a film noire kick, and whilst each cop is a bastard, and to copsbplay is copaganda, I dunno. 80% of These movies feature a drooling police force so incurious that a maximum of 1 detective has an entire brain, and he never bothers standing up for truth without the intervention of a hot lady.

Our mall just got a Build a Hair Vessel Workshop.

Neckoid

1 magic trick is the weirdest number of magic tricks to know.

I hate spotify for a few political reasons but the big shining #1 reason is that there's some guy with his hand on the knob, who can flick the knob, and Christmas music will breach seasonal quarantine.

Furries acting like these bipedal talking animal movies are made by innocent offline angels & we're bringing the impurity to it like yogurt corrupts a petri dish but like... Have you ever met an animation major born after 1980 who isn't either a furry or an anime in their downtime?

Aw yea, summertime. Firing up the ol' grill. Crackin' open some cold ones. Igniting the ol' brewski stove. Sparking up the big meat bong. Stenching out with my man the Towering Beef Plume. Waftin' the ol' pork cloud into the ol' neighboring apartment complex. Sharin' that nonconsentual BBQ cigarette

Don't wake me until I've stood upright for Hello Cow Lady Beverage.

Here's a food rationing tip I learned during Hurricane Sandy, you can boil thoughts and prayers in a Bripe to make a delicious water flavored soup.

Bourteen'b.