Airport intercom: did someone leave a laptop at security? My husband: do you have your laptop? Me: 😬 As airport security pages "Julie Calidonio" In my defense, I have no defense just that motherhood has made me the equivalent of Dory from Finding Nemo. And it was my work laptop 🫠 #motherhood

There's a bit of irony that I just told my daughter I can't walk with her because I need to share my essay on my socials when the essay is about choosing her over pursuing my writing. Read below about how I resolved my mommy midlife crisis. Thank you! #writing #motherhood medium.com/middle-pause...

Me to car salesman: I can't part with my 2014 Honda Odyssey for sentimental reasons Him: this might be inappropriate to say but you remind me of Zeta-Jones. Me: Catherine Zeta-Jones? Him: Yes from Zorro. Have u seen it? Me: here's my van. I will take every car you have #humor #hondaodyssey #minivan

My husband: what do you want for Mother's Day? Me: for you to write the synopsis for my book 🤷🏻‍♀️ #querying #queryingauthors

When you spend ten minutes trying to escape the snake in your house only to realize it's a dog leash 👀 #humor

My latest essay talks about what I learned from landing my agent but failing out on submission to book publishers. If you are #amquerying, please read and learn from my mistakes! You only get one bite at the apple. #writingcommunity #writers #writingtips #querying medium.com/middle-pause...

Now that I'm 40ish, should I cut my hair! 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ #advice

My son is a hard core #bibliophile. It's hard to keep up with his appetite for books, but I realized I have saved my books from my 4 years at Duke. His goal is to get through then by the end of the summer! 🤯 I love how curious he is. We'll be posting updates as he goes!! #books #mybooks #duke

Is 69k unread emails below average, average or above average? 👀😬🤷🏻‍♀️ #emailhoarder #lifelessons

Do I tell him they are for the kids or just let him feel special? ❤️❤️❤️ #marriedlife #nostalgia #thelittlethings

What it's like being together 26 years: @kmschmid1977.bsky.social snuggles my neck and whispers: is that Biofreeze or Noxzema I smell? I whisper back: both. He hugs me tighter and says: I knew it. Love you. #Marriedlife #myhusband

Check out my essay about being Hispanic when you don't speak Spanish. They call me a "no sabo kid"--but I'm doing what I can to preserve my father's culture. #hispanic #writing medium.com/middle-pause...

THE GOOD PART x DO I KNOW YOU? An impulsive anniversary wish sends an unhappy power couple back in time, rewinding two decades of deception and offering them a chance to explore what might’ve been if they hadn’t married #P2Ppit #a #r #q

THE GOOD PART x DO I KNOW YOU? An impulsive anniversary wish sends an unhappy power couple back in time, rewinding two decades of deception and offering them a chance to explore what might’ve been if they hadn’t married #cupit #a #ttr #rc

Read about the time I was catcalled with my kids while at lunch, teaching me that sexual harassment doesn't end with motherhood! #writingcommunity #women medium.com/middle-pause...

Lately, it feels like my dream of being a writer is playing second fiddle to my real world obligations and day time job. So excited to attend the Deep Dive to get focused in 2025! #dds2025excited #writingcommunity

It's fitting to have this published as I'm boarding my flight home from El Salvador, an empty trip w/o him there. I long for those idyllic days of riding in the back of a pickup truck up winding roads to travels unknown, inhaling her scents with him at the wheel. #Grief medium.com/the-wind-pho...

THE GOOD PART x DO I KNOW YOU? After a power couple’s impulsive 20th anniversary wish sends them back in time and erases their unhappy marriage, they make a pact to help each other fulfill the lost dreams of their youth. #P2Ppit #a #r #q

PITCH: In a world controlled by corporate vampires, two men struggle for autonomy. Will a chance meeting lead them to freedom—or a web of subterfuge, where every thread brings a monster offering death or permanent confinement? #P2PPIT 📖 💙📚 #Q #R #A Power Hungry CEO x Abandoned Puppy Bartender

HEARTLESS x KILT TRIP, C FORTUNE for tone ’97: it’s ONLY ONE SUMMER IN BERLIN, then she can return to France. But she’s falling for the city—and her reluctant host. Their chemistry sizzles. The devastating catch? She must go. Heartfelt, retro #R #P2Ppit #UW #Q #A

When Keira's sister is captured by a shape-shifting immortal, she teams up with the God of Light to rescue her; but an ancient darkness grows within Keira, and she must choose between stopping those who seek to harness it or saving those she loves. ✨️ #P2Ppit #Q #A #RF 🌗

JOURNEY TO RALLEM Josie, Jameson, and their friends travel across the continent in the hopes of bringing back Josie's lovers. They face unexpected challenges from meddling, immortal ancestors with age old vendettas. At each turn, events drive Josie and Jameson closer. #P2Ppit #Q #r #f

THE GOOD PART x DO I KNOW YOU? An impulsive anniversary wish sends an unhappy power couple back in time, rewinding two decades of deception and offering them a chance to explore what might’ve been if they hadn’t married #P2Ppit #a #r #q Co-written with my husband @kmschmid1977.bsky.social

THE LIFE BETWEEN follows a cancer survivor afraid to hope for a future beyond her next three-month scan. But when she crosses paths with a deploying soldier, he inspires her to fully embrace life even if neither of them survives the year. #p2ppit #uw #A

"Yes, I’m calling it a hoo-ha to pander to the common denominator and trick men into reading an article about women’s health..." Read my essay about why it's important to study the impact of perimenopause and menopause on our health. Clapping is appreciated. #women medium.com/middle-pause...

What every writer of personal essays fears hearing from their twelve year old son: mom, I googled you and you are all over the internet. 😳😳😳😳 Me: Don't read any of it! #writingcommunity

My husband @kmschmid1977.bsky.social and I are ending 2024 agreeing on a beginning for our joint novel! Our book baby is finally ready to be sent into the world. Hopefully good things are on our writing horizon for 2025 🥳🥳🥳 #writingcommunity #writing

Someone left this comment on my latest essay and it's everything. Thank you stranger for making me think maybe I'm not a failure as a writer. 🤷🏻‍♀️ #writingcommunity #writer

When your husband has a boo and it's not you!! Read about how I learned to cope with not being the center of my husband's world! #bromance #marriage #humor medium.com/bouncin-and-... medium.com/bouncin-and-...

With #type1diabetes, you can do everything right 99.99% of the time, but it will only take one untreated low to lose my son. Those are not odds I will roll the dice on--ever! Neither should his school district. Click below to learn more. #type1diabetes medium.com/middle-pause...

In this latest episode of my 40 year old life, I saw this test on the counter. Sighed that I wasn't pregnant, but wondered when I did the test bc I didn't remember peeing on it. Then I realized it was my son's covid test. Unless I did pee on it and we have to begin again... 👀 #motherhood

I currently have 17 followers on here. Would showing some skin get me to 18? My forearm has seen better days but it still gets the occasional wink by passersby.

My husband and I agreed to rotate picking out Christmas movies to watch in December. So that basically means I'm watching Die Hard 15 times. 🤷🏻‍♀️

How do you make friends on BlueSky? Asking for a friend who has no BlueSky friends. Also, that friend is me. 👀

My husband and I both work from home. When I feel overwhelmed, I'll ask him for a cuddle break. We cuddle for a few minutes and it helps get me through the day. 26 years together and he's still my cuddle buddy. ❤️

He's an investment consultant. I'm an attorney. But we are both writers Life has so many paths. Glad we got to share that today at our kids' school #greatamericanteachin event!❤️❤️❤️ #writingcommunity @kmschmid1977.bsky.social