Sometimes, when I get home from work, I need to take a few minutes to consciously uncouple from my day.

I love you like local sports news anchors love to take the opportunity to call Philadelphia “the city of brotherly love”.

In these trying times, the people need a hero. A symbol we can stand behind. We need Boner Satan.

This is kind of a humble brag, but it’s unintentional - our townhouse has 4 bathrooms and there’s only three of us in our family. When my brother and his family come to visit, it makes it seven people in the house and sometimes there’s 0 bathrooms.

When I was 18, my girlfriend’s father (an investment banker) pushed me to invest. So I did. I stuck $25 a month into a mutual fund and diversified and followed his plan. “You will have a projected $1M by the time you are my age.” He was nearly 50 at the time. I’m coming up in 50, and I’m shy of

This week I’ve had to ask a number of people to do the math when we’re talking about Daylight Savings Time. It was only ever 4 months of Standard Time and 8 months of DST. It was never “half the year in darkness”.

I don’t understand airplane seating and our corporate travel people. Every time I have a flight, they say “have you specified your preferred seat?” Then I say look it up. And they say “aisle” and promptly book a middle seat. And is seat selection 49 hours out or 24 hours out? Bah.

Not sure if Toronto (downtown) is just bonkers, or it’s a Sunday thing or maybe a full moon thing, but wow.

Traveling for work is crazy. Not long ago, relatively, I would had to take a horse and wagon across the country to get to this trade show. I should have left 4 months ago! Instead in 4 hours I’m just here now. And I have to work.

Oh man; it’s nothing but weird degens in the mall today. Oh no… I… oh no.

I’m eleventy billion years old and have worked for a number of companies and I still don’t know how to react to emails when someone gets fired. Even if they’re amazing or terrible.

Today, life has given me lemons.

I need a dark, sexy vibes shirt for a party. Does Randy River still exist?

Sat down on a bench in the mall to wait for my wife and oh fuck I’m a middle-aged guy sitting on a bench in the mall. I used to be cool.

I feel like the world is all sorts of insane all at once and like what the hell? Was it always like this?

Was just in our work elevator with Ken Sim. Weird.

I crossed the street past the guy from the BC Hydro commercials and I looked at him for an uncomfortable amount of time and he looked at me back and then we passed each other and that was a week ago and it still bothers me. Anyway, we’re in love now.

Watching the Seattle Torrent and the Toronto Scepters play and the only thing that’s bugging me is that the team names should be reversed. Doesn’t Toronto Torrent and Seattle Scepters sound better? Maybe I just like alliteration. Anyway, it’s a good game.

Okay, so it’s 10:15 am Christmas morning, I’ve been awake since 6:20am, and the 16-year-old child has finally risen and… he has decided to shower. We have not celebrated Christmas morning yet and on average this is a 45 minute endeavor.

My wife came to the gym with me today. Finally. I’m very proud of her.

Happy darkest day of the year to all who celebrate.

Without getting into the gory details, three pretty awful things have happened this December. I’m pretty close to a pre-2026 menty b.

Catching up on 2011 by finally watching Game of Thrones.

I love how our language is so insanely binary that you can find an opposing phrase of advice for every bit of advice given. Some examples:

He was the sweetest fluff buddy anyone could have ever asked for. I already miss him so much. Just pure heartbreak. I hope you’re chasing birdies right now, Charles. I love you so much. 💔

Those moments that define you? One of them happened tonight and I chose poorly. I was at a work holiday party while my wife and son took our cat to the vet to be put down. Crying on the SkyTrain is very cool (sarc.)

I know I’m an adult, and if I want cake, I can just go buy cake, but I shouldn’t buy cake, so I won’t buy cake, but I could buy cake, but also cake is expensive.

I fucking LOVE “A Praise Chorus” by Jimmy Eat World, but that one line “… even at 25, you gotta start sometimes…” really bugs me when I hear it at almost 50. Bro, you didn’t know anything then and you can restart anytime. And you’re probably going to have to. And I’m sure Jim Adkins has done.

My feed is depressing and I am tired. Please, suggest to me some funny MFers to follow.

I know a few people who used to go hard in the party scene. Like, hard. And they’ve gotten cleaned up and that’s really great, but now they’re going hard on sobriety. And that’s great too. It’s when they go so hard on sobriety that the perceived assumption is that everyone who is not sober is out

I am not Max Muncy from the Dodgers, but thanks for checking, though.

It’s story time! A weird, random anecdote for the 12 people still here reading this. At the SkyTrain platforms, twice a day, each day I commute into work, I watch as people move up and down the stairs on their commutes. I see everyone. All types of people. There’s the speedsters, the slowpokes,

I’ve been at the top of my game; I’m a level under that now, and I feel like I want to get back up, but I hated it there, so why do I feel that way? It’s been a couple of years and I don’t remember how to do it.

Had a little spiral yesterday, realizing I’m turning 50 in 2026, and realizing that I probably only have a solid 30 years of life left, which makes my son not quite my age when I die (assuming I die at 80) and it freaked me out.

My skin crawls when people refer to their wife as “the wife”.

I got separated from my wife at London Drugs and I can’t find here so I guess we’re divorced now.

I swear the guy next to me on the SkyTrain was wearing Sex Panther Cologne. My eyes are still watering.

Looks like I didn’t get raptured. Again.

Okay, it’s officially the end of summer. Feel free to post that.

Sydney’s Weenie.

I’ve never been good at expressing my opinion. Maybe more accurately I’ve never been good at standing behind my opinion. I have opinions. But I also have a need to be liked. And I’m tired and I don’t want to fight. But I want to express my opinions and be bold enough to stand behind them.

I walk past pickle ballers every morning at 7am on my way to work. It used to bug me that they were at it so early, but I’m up at 7am on Sundays ripping motorbikes with my friends. So I get it.

Unpaid labour? This guy had a work dream about installing a 50 foot demo screen at a trade show.

My baby boy started his carpentry program in grade 11 at a new school today. So proud of him. Also, why is he so old?

I want everyone to know that this is NOT the last week of summer. Summer ends September 21. Don’t be a sucka.

I have my annual review today (well, I’m only 10 months in but they review all at the same time). I know I’m good, but in this economy? Who knows?

R.I.P. to my trusty Krups coffee grinder. It coughed out one last very inconsistent grind before conking out. You served with duty and honour, and you will be missed.

The dentists at Brentwood missed out on an opportunity to rebrand it as “Brentistry”. Nope; that sucks. Sorry.

Another work success today. It floors me to finally be part of an organization that is open to trying new marketing ideas and having them lead to actual results.

Is “I wake up feeling rested and refreshed” a real statement about how people feel?