I now have access back on my main Instagram account!

Update on OCD recovery: I am 3 weeks free of engaging in compulsions and rituals. The hardest part is THOUGHTS. My body is shaking all the time. I feel scared all the time.

I wanted to experiment with colour and texture. #astarion #baldursgate3 #bg3fanart #astarionbg3 #astarionfanart

I forgot to post the full painting of this. It’s just a study of the moment when Astarion ascends. #astarion #astarionfanart #ascendedastarion

Bless her cotton socks. I really want to talk about her to someone 🥺

I’ve been working on this #wyll painting for a few days now ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 Reference is a VP by the lovely @adrielmancy.bsky.social #baldursgate3 #bg3 #bg3wyll

OCD recovery is hard but it really does pay off eventually. I was really stuck in the pits with it for a year. But it’s true what they say. Acceptance hurts but it really is the key.

𝓐 𝓦𝓪𝓵𝓽𝔃 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓢𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓱𝓭 Latest piece for a WONDERFUL client. Their absolutely stunning D&D character with Strahd Von Zarovich 🧛🏻💃 #d&dart #strahd #strahdvonzarovich #ocart #fantasyart #illustration

oh thirteen, you're so special to me. another art piece! #thirteenthdoctor #doctorwho #jodiewhittaker

I finally finished my painting of my dark urge Drow, Acantha. I love her so much. Her story is marred in tragedy and angst. 💜💜🖤🖤 #baldursgate3 #bg3 #durge #darkurge #baldursgate3fanart

Why do some mods make Tav/durge look like a teenager or child? 😧

The Duality Two paths of the same story. One to embrace, one to deny. Both to over-come the past and live for the future. ❤️‍🩹 #astarion #baldursgate3 #astarionfanart #bg3 #baldursgate3fanart

Work in progress. Still a color study with only the gouache brush, without using the smudge tool. It's the only thing that doesn't drain my remaining energy too much lately 🫠 #wip #raphael #bg3 #baldursgate3 #art #procreate

Last year i was persistently stuck at the 500 mark so this growth feels wild to me. I am so thankful for the support I have received recently on instagram. I think my recent shift in how I engage with the community has been a factor.

My newest Astarion painting. This is a repaint based on a VP by my dear friend Ellessario! #astarion #astarionart #baldursgate3 #bg3 #astarionfanart

I have. .acquired a doomed yaoi in my Saturday game and I'm already drowning. 😭 Sorrel is from Juniper's past, a relationship that ended in heartbreak and Sorrel running away from home. Despite not having seen him in years, Jun's current adventures are making those memories resurface. #fiwork #dnd

Cheeky Pup 🥀 #astarion piece i did that i’m OBSESSED with🥴 prints on my website!!! bbybelart.bigcartel.com/product/chee... #bg3

this piece is up on my website as a print!!! inspired by james dean & the reference pics i was scrolling through on pinterest 🙂‍↕️ bbybelart.bigcartel.com/product/jame... #bg3 #astarion

take her hand? #doctorwho #thirteenthdoctor #jodiewhittaker

As a nsfw artist I believe it’s a really big red flag when other nsfw artists don’t know the difference between CNC and r@pe.

One of the best things I did was give myself permission to start healing. It was like a weight lifted off my shoulders. I am learning how to draw quicker. I am enjoying writing whatever I want. I am choosing peace over confrontation. I am not people pleasing.

Happy Pride Month to me and my evil gay friends.

Gradually reconnecting with people feels good. I have finally cracked past some of my negative ruminations (I have ocd) and found a ground of acceptance. Instagram feels better. It’s been good to start talking to old acquaintances again. I’m feeling proud of my art achievements.

Normalise giving yourself a fucking break.

‘Violent Delights’ A new painting for the #ascendedastarion fans. It didn’t take long and it was only supposed to be a colour study at first. I hope y’all like it ❤️‍🔥 #astarion #baldursgate3 #bg3 #astarionfanart

Also want to add that I’ve been overwhelmed with the amount of support on instagram regarding my art. People are so kind and it really gives me the motivation to keep practicing.

Illness and grief has taken so much from me this past year. I am so so thankful to my friends who stuck with me, even when I was silent. I am lucky to have some of the best people in my life ❤️‍🩹

Yep applies to all fandoms 👏 Despite some truly horrible experiences within this fandom, I’ve also made some incredible friends and experienced a lot of kindness!

I have finally finished a fully coloured realism piece of #astarion It’s honestly just a redraw of the below screenshot. While no imagination was involved this did challenge how I render. His coat and lace was a difficult. But the hardest thing was definitely the colour. #baldursgate3 #bg3fanart

While I’ve been poorly I’ve been working on some realism. It doesn’t challenge me on an imagination level but it does help me brush up my technical skills. I recently finished this Astarion piece, I originally painted this back in December and wanted to redo it. #astarion #baldursgate3 #bg3

I’ve been really unwell for the past week and a half. There’s also been other stuff going on but I’ve felt a lot of comfort in the community lately. Instagram has been improving for me and it seems like my reach is improving. I know SM isn’t everything but it has been a nice escape.

Extraordinarily hard 7 days with grief and issues with my physical health. Really struggled but I am still here. Here’s an old pic of my loves ❤️‍🩹

Something, something, lipstick kissies #fiwork #astarion #astarionancunin #bg3 #baldursgate3

Designing/figuring out a new OC to help with some Juniper angst (my harengon from a campaign I'm in) and dammit. Gdi. His name is Sorrel. #fiwork #harengon #sketches #dnd

Grief feels like a deep, jagged, bleeding wound this week. And it makes me feel so alone. Every time I try to reply to a message, my thumbs linger over my phone, words evade me. My cheeks are sore from my tears. My sleep is infected with hospital flashbacks. My chest aches.

Sometimes I really think people just want Wyll’s personality in Astarion’s body.

If you snub your friend just because they’re doing better than you, then you were never really a friend. Can we normalise bigging up our friends when they create amazing stuff? 🖤

I also feel like my OCD is going to spike and I literally hate it so much. It’s like being lost in a choking fog and I hate it. I will ride it out to the best of my ability.

The awful thing about dealing with grief is that I feel so fucking dreadful this week and I’ve hardly had communication with friends or family for the past 4 days and I don’t even know how to ask for help. Like, I don’t know what to say to people. It’s like I am looking through a window.

The future cover for my yet-to-be-published fic 🌿 #Astarion #BG3 #WIP

Heh yeah

I've participated in a fan artbook featuring Baldur's Gate 3 cooking recipes!!! Besides the illustrations for the book, I worked on merch and dakimakura with Astarion this is the first thing I want to show you >///< #Astarion #BaldursGate3 #bg3

a recent print i made for my shop :) #jodiewhittaker #thirteenthdoctor

Tough anniversaries are coming up. May be disconnected/out of sorts. I am thankful for those who’ve actually checked in. ❤️‍🩹

style study of the gf #thirteenthdoctor #jodiewhittaker

One of my online besties made this beautiful piece of my Cass and Astarion 🥹 #astarion

…and another artist I greatly admired 😍

Another artist who inspires me to improve my skills 🥹