Every time I see a picture of a Cybertruck, the theme from "Steptoe and Son" plays in my head.

This week sees the release of "Hades II", sequel to the only video game I've liked this century. But they've done that thing of conflating Cronus (primal titan) with Chronos (embodiment of time), and ooh it boils my pedant-piss. This is why I can't have nice things.

Now I'm in my 50s, I find myself surprised that people traditionally get more conservative as they grow older. Because I'm old enough to have watched the same right-wing bullshit over and over and over again. I'm probably more radicalised now than I was in my 20s. I just don't have any energy left.

Genderqueer sequel to "BlaKkK Klansman" called "Transman Klansman".

Two years ago, I started writing about Russell T. Davies' problems with #DoctorWho stories set in the present. I never posted it because civilisation is actually burning and I felt silly, but since everyone's going to be squeeing about Alex Kingston on "Strictly" this week, I might as well.

I have a "Doctor Who" screed coming up in a bit. I know, it's been ages.

Under the Old Republic, Wookiee culture valued craftsmanship and interaction with nature. Twenty years later, Chewbacca's family from the Holiday Special live in a consumerist suburbia. This is accidentally the best satire of imperialism in Star Wars.

Yeah? Well I'm gonna be (*six*-hundred miles).

Presumably there's a Canny Valley where all the convincing androids live. Also a Reet Canny Valley where all the Geordie androids live.

Petition: Marvel Studios should make a film based on Jack Kirby's "2001: A Space Odyssey" comic, following the same plot as the original "2001", but in the Marvel universe with characters like Vira the She-Demon and Mister Machine.

I like watching documentaries about police officers on the beat and imagining how they'd act in the same situations if the cameras weren't there. I think I've invented Realist Headcanon.

So there *was* life on Mars, but it was a godawful small affair.

I should write for the Wall Street Journal.

I've read this Wiki page and they've definitely missed some.

Apparently the FBI searched the home of a guy they think shot that other guy, and he had a gold-tier Antifa membership certificate, and a T-shirt that said "sickos", and also he liked to dress up as a woman, but a furry woman called Foxy Wokebitch. It'll be all over the internet tomorrow.

Stevyn Colgan's "Jabbagpuss" (2012). This is my kind of scum. Baggy and a bit loose at the seams.

Important rules clarification from the "Magic: The Gathering" website. #mtg

"Graham Linehan arrested at Heathrow over his X posts." www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

@talkingpicturestv.bsky.social Enjoying how you scheduled a film called "The Nudist Story" between "Public Eye" and "Hands of a Stranger".

I'm not saying Keir Starmer should be harpooned through the kidneys, but I do *completely get* why someone would want Keir Starmer to be harpooned through the kidneys.

The change in personality I've experienced after upping my dose of antidepressants really underlines that far from being discrete and self-willed individuals, we're honestly just bloated sacks full of chemicals oh I made myself sad again.

Sliding into your future light-cone in defiance of the laws of special relativity like

Just as the problem with "The Descent" is that the creatures in the second half aren't as horrifying as the thought of crawling through a collapsing cave with no hope of rescue, the problem with "Nope" is that the billowy sky-monster in the second half isn't as horrifying as the chimp. #Nope #Film4

I have reoccurring dreams about eating pieces of Lego. They're crunchy and addictive, but taste of nothing apart from a vague sweetness. And every time I put one in my mouth, I think: "I'll never be able to rebuild the Lego set that piece came from again." Then I wake up sad.

You're more likely to have five coin-flips come up heads than to roll double-six on a pair of dice, and that's just ridiculous. PROBABILITY YOU ARSE.

Following the deaths of both Gene Hackman and Terence Stamp, police have released a sketch of a man whom they believe may be able to help with their enquiries.

It's said that when a near-senile Reagan met Gorbachev for "talks", he'd nod at everything Gorbachev said, then go out of the room and be quietly muttered-at by George Bush's people. After which he'd go back in and explain that he wasn't necessarily agreeing to anything. Now... (1/2)

The AI that sorts things on Amazon Prime has decided "The Six Million Dollar Man" counts as DIY, which is sort of how you'd *expect* a robot to see it.

With the first brace of "Strictly" contestants announced, news sources are universally referring to "Doctor Who's Alex Kingston", which must piss her off almost as much as it does me. "'Doctor Who fans are screaming!' says Dianne Buswell." Listen, you sign up Milton Johns, *then* I'll be screaming.

Sylvia Nemesis.

To Hell with your fancy mathematics, I'll never accept that 2004 was as long ago for people nowadays as 1963 was for people in 1984. #TOTP

It's been said that nostalgia's a form of depression. I think I belong to a part of Gen-X that feels wholly alienated by the modern world and instinctively wants to shelter in the past, but also remembers that what we liked about the past was the way we used to look forward to the future... (1/2)

Being over 50 feels like being Rutger Hauer at the end of "Blade Runner", watching your foundational memories fade from pop-history. I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. The ladybird invasion of '76. A dog who says "sausages". All those things will be lost in time, like Chegwin in the rain.

Announcing this right on the heels of the OSA might look like a horrifying attempt to stage-manage the UK's internet culture, if it weren't for the fact that the people doing it have all the Machiavellian ingenuity of cress.

A big theme for US-based YouTube is "how [pop-culture thing] changed [genre] forever", where the genre's global but the pop-culture thing is unknown outside America. ("This ONE SKETCH from 'LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY SPANNERS' sent SHOCKWAVES through the WHOLE OF COMEDY!") The UK should try doing that.

I wanted to watch that Japanese horror movie "Ringu", but I think I got the wrong tape.

I enjoy "unsolved mystery" YouTubes, but in every case, the explanation's likely to be the same: witnesses are useless. Yeah, nobody saw the vanished woman leave the railway carriage. But I don't automatically trust people who had no reason to be paying attention and who've been dead for 120 years.

42 years on, what's most striking about "V for Vendetta" (not the movie version) is that although its post-WW2-coded version of Britain was never feasible as an '80s dystopia, it's *exactly* the version of Britain that Reform voters want now. Even under Thatcher, nobody tried to make it 1946 again.

"Clash of the Titans" AND "Time Bandits" AND "Excalibur" had their UK premieres on this day in 1981. And people think Barbenheimer was A Big Moment.

'80s Italian horror movie "Witchery" features a woman being sucked into the '70s #DoctorWho title sequence. Only tinted red, because it's evil now. (At 39:00.) www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZHj...

D'you think fantasy nerds in the '30s ever thought to themselves "I really want to write a monster guide for Lord Dunsany's 'Pegāna' stories, but there's a new camp in Buchenwald and Spain's fallen to the fascists and 200,000 people have been massacred in Nanjing and now I just feel f***ing stupid"?

If your mansion house needs haunting, just call

There used to be a segment on "Multi-Coloured Swap Shop" (c. 1976) where kids with interesting collections would show them off to Noel Edmonds. And I just found an episode on the Internet Archive that's, um... quite something. archive.org/details/tv-a... (segment starts at 30:15).

Who is this "Lee Obese" person, what's he so morbid about, and why does my doctor keep mistaking me for him?

I think what we really need, amongst all of this [gestures at burning world run by billionaire far-right narcissistic capitalists], is a parable about the lies of mid-twentieth-century Soviet communism. You know. For kids.