I'm so filled with sadness and frustration and it's making me feel physically ill

Wish I could be the kind of mentally ill where you're delusionally happy all the time no matter what. Instead I got the 'making up things to worry about' when there are actually things to worry about kind of mental illness.

Also there's only 48 days until spring comes hell yeah!!!

I feel like my first post of the day is always complainin 😕 Anyways let's try again, I've had caffeine now 😅 good morning frens 🌞💜🌞💜 Hope everyone is staying warm and doing something that makes you feel good. Will try again to be productive today but it feels like a 😴 kind of day tbh

Woke up freezing again, to temperatures way way lower than what was predicted. Hi, -9. Lo, also -9. Once again it lightS ME ON FIRE. People will die if they cannot actually prepare for weather condition.people cannot survive subzero temperatures for days on end of they DON'T KNOW IT'S COMING

Brekfist - grape juice mixed with water (1:5) maybe like a cup. He watched me mixing it up last night and said, "so you just want slightly grape flavored water?" Lol. It still tastes so strong to me. Seeing how many days in a row I can skip eñsúr without him noticing 😈

🧅🧅 Depressionion 🧅🧅

Turns out completely isolating yourself is not the right way to deal with this 🙃 wish I had a time machine. I'm just so scared of making everyone hate me.

There will probably not be any posts from me for a while as Jānuary-mårch are a lot of traümä dates back to back to back and this is the first time that I'm going through it alone. Hopefully I bounce back by April 💜 just doing my part to protect the world from myself. I'll miss you all 🫂

I find myself wanting to read something. But what I want to read is soooo specific. Which is why I write, but sometimes I just wish it was already written for me 🙃

I'm alive 👍🏾 didn't win the auction but that's ok. Been wanting to post here but I saw people are getting their accounts snatched so I have been in le hiding. Feels a lot like really bad times are here. Hoping we'll all be okay.

Omg how am I going to make it through six whole entire days 🫣

Ehhh eeeepy. Good morning!! 💜☀️💜 Please grant me good luck (help me win bid on the eeebae) so I can receive the talisman of good fortune (discontinued tamagotchi that goes for $300+ but I just saw listings for $75 and I've never bid on anything so idk how much hope to have)

Every time I visit my aunt I vividly remember when I was a teenager and she took me shopping. There was no juniors section so we were trying to find petit clothes to fit me and out of nowhere she goes "enjoy it, it's not gonna last forever." And I was kinda like 🤨

I will absolutely forget I posted this, and so will everyone else lol, but here's my goals for the year 1) do more things 2) passable beginner/level 1 Korean 3) wallzz on dis houseeee baybeeee We shall see if there's success in the cards

I'm so tempted to get myself a new Tama... But I can't even decide which one I would want 😮‍💨

I got a really cute and comfy sweater from my husbeeee 🥰🥰 we've been watching ST and I'm happy to have a bit of subtle merch ((pic stole from hoogle))

Thank you everyone who was thinking about lil ol me and my lil ol family today 🥰💜💜 we are officially on our way home!

If you're the 'keeping people in your thoughts' kind of person would you keep a thought going for me and my husband and doggos today? We'll be doing a lot of traveling 💜 In return I will do my best to make sure everyone has a good day and that good things happen, thank you 🥰🥰

Welp. Heat wave for the entire week before crimmaz, but now It's raining sheets of ice one day before we get to drive across the state. If I have to cancel I'll be so upset.

I couldn't get pictures fast enough but this year I decided this family does traditions in this camper. So I snuck out of bed early, quietly hid a bunch of dog treats all around the house (kinda like easter) and woke them up for the feast :p

HAPPY CHRYSLER!!!!! MERRY CRISIS!!!! 🎊🎄🎁💜🎊🎁🎄🎁💜🎊💜🎄🎄💜 HOEHOEHOE!!!!! 💜💜💜💜

Looping 😮‍💨

It'll never make sense to me how it's fine for other people to ignore me for as long as they want to, and I'm not allowed to take it personally because "people have lives" or whatever. But if I don't respond to /their/ messages then I hate them and I'm a bad friend and unreliable and bring petty 🤨

*rolling on the floor* !heeyyyy.... H-HEYYYY!!! good mornin ☀️🌞☀️ today from 6am until 8am Choco will be standing at the side of the road, yelling about things they enjoy so Santa knows what kind of friends to bring- if you're on the guest list already then there's no need to wait for your invite 💜

Im clapping for all of you who get your steps in, cheerinb with my whole sedentary ass 💜 genulinly proud of you guys fr and stepping vicariously through you

Pros- i can sip on it all day long and keeps me feeling not hubgry for almost the whole day. Cons- isn't there milk in this?

Oh it was 88# ( ⬇️ almost 2# ty 💩!) this morning but I forgot about it lmao. Kinda the universe throwing my entire argument about stopping the nutrition drinks right back in my face honestly. Oh well, I'll be small 'enough' for crimmass not that anyone will notice or care

Thinking about the time my dad brought the family to red 🦞 and asked me to pass him the cracker for his crab legs. And with absolutely zero self control I replied "I'm pretty sure it's better to just call them whyte ppl" 💜💜 he never took me anywhere again 😅

Study plans foiled by the dastardly subscription fee 😮‍💨 boooo lame

Long time ago lost all my friends. They told me to change. I changed, and still nobody wants me. And I can't remember how to be the way I was. I erased myself for nothing.

Good morning 🌞🌞🌞🌞 Tried to bring up the idea of quitting the Enshures last night. He got upset and then claimed that I'm actually smaller than I was at the start of the year... 🤨 Yet I'm 99% sure that I vividly remember seeing 83 when I first got that scale. Making me feel crazy for asking.

Choco doesn't get to use the Internet today ✌🏾 Choco is in timeout for spiraling after only 2 hours of being awake. 💜💜

At least I went back to 89. At least there's that.......

Wow I'm super bitter today sheesh. There's a sniper on the rooftop of my brain, assassinating any and all positive or productive thoughts on sight.

Good morning! Feeling like the narrator today 💜 maybe even a reliable one

The urge to ask for tamagotchi's for Christmas, but knowing I already have the "available" ones and what I really want is for someone to spend hours refreshing ebay until my dream Tamas magically appear.

I like to tell myself I don't have delusions, then catch myself thinking "maybe somehow my husband opened the ensurr bottles and somehow put more c4lori3es in, and then somehow perfectly sealed them back up so I wouldn't know." 😅😅

90 two days in a row 😮‍💨 skipping 3nsur3 today and gonna om4d dinner tonight. If I try really hard I could probably get down to 85 again by xm4s

Need to move somewhere warm so I don't have to wear massive clothes all the time. I wanna dress up in those barely clothes cute outfits and be a dainty little fairy. Y'know the one that looks like the top of made out of dew drops ?? Yeh yeh yeh, that one. ((Helllooooo mixed/man-ic episode ig))

Oh and also, - I forgor what I was going to post on this post. Have a good morning friends 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘 happy happy day

What if I started trying to lucid dream again but this time they weren't all nightmares?

Goal in the new year is for people to go "hmmm, human??" When they look at me 💜💜 that's been my goal for my entire life tho- maybe this time

With no context at all: FUCK GRÆT VALŪ TRASH BAGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Am I am apple

Y'all the stress is making me gigantic 🙃 wéit w/ clothes was 90 today 🤫

Me: I don't receive your messages because I don't have messenger Family: yes you do. Why are you lying to grandma telling her we aren't including you in the plans? Me: .... Literally what??

There's some snow melting and it's making the most perfect cartoon "bloop" sound every time. Foley artists are envious of my environment

I wish it worked like a video game- like you could just be like "oh shit, I fucked up optimization I gotta prestige so I can use my points to make my stats better" Nepo baby : ◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️[][][] Brain chem : ◻️◻️◻️◻️[][][][] Rizz: ◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️

As the freak child who is broken beyond repair, am I the one who has to tell my parents that they messed up? honestly thought they would come around and be apologetic for the past. They act like nothing ever happened. Do I have to send them a text like "hey I'm kinda mad" I thought it was obvious